#I maybe have shattered it once so we had to replace it but like not an upgrade

[elix8r]

Prada Shoes and I Love Yous

PAIRING: heeseung x fem!reader 

GENRE: smut, angst, crack, (some?) fluff, college!au, exes to lovers!au, enemies to lovers!au, socialite/richkid!au

SUMMARY: Life as a socialite wasn’t all champagnes and designer labels, especially not with the turn your reputation took due to a simple misunderstanding. Now, you were being painted by everyone as a big fat cheater who shattered her sweet boyfriend’s heart—a narrative that couldn’t be further from the truth. In reality, it was him who had betrayed your trust. Frustrated and feeling deeply wronged, you returned to society and the new school year after a summer of cutting off contact with everyone and the drama. But just when you thought you were ready to face the world again, you were blindsided by something unexpected: the lingering effect Heeseung had on you. And who could blame you? Heeseung was way too hot for you to get over in just three short months and now, seeing him with the girl he once told you not to worry about all over him? Oh, it was on. 

You refused to be replaced, labeled as a crazy ex, or forgotten. No, you were going to make Lee Heeseung realize that you were the best motherfucking thing to had ever happened to him. 

WC: 21.4k

WARNINGS: some extent of emotionally cheating? (not actual cheating i swear it’s kinda unintentional), jake is a bestie and fwb hybrid (kinda flirty but it’s very much platonic i swear), so much miscommunication, profanity, drinking, drugs, physical altercation, mentions of puke, slut shaming, mentions of pregnancy (no one is actually pregnant), toxic relationship, roughdom!heeseung and sub!y/n, unprotected sex, oral (m recieving), rough sex, unprepped? sex (consensual), creampie, mirror sex, deepthroating, cowgirl, dick too big?, creampie, and i am so sorry but karina is a BITCH like it’s almost campy how villainess she comes off

AUTHOR'S NOTE: hope everyone has fun with this one!! had a lot of fun writing it like and i'd love to hear you guys' feedback! love you lots <3 ☺️

Fuck Lee Heeseung. Fuck Lee Heeseung. Fuck Lee Heeseung.

This was all you found yourself repeating in your mind like it was some mantra while you reapplied your lip gloss, making sure to take one last good look at yourself in the mirror before shutting it close once you felt the plane’s wheels coming to a stop. From the outside, you looked absolutely perfect as not a single hair could be found out of place; no one would’ve guessed that you had been on a plane for over 10 hours. But inside, you were a wreck as you felt your anxiety shooting up as your heart raced a million beats per minute.

“You need to loosen up, you look like you have a stick up your ass.” Jake was lazily scrolling on his phone while nursing a champagne in his hand, barely sparing a glance at you. He seemed to be in a much more relaxed state than you were.

You scoffed before sending him a glare. “You know, if anything, you should be the one panicking right now. Everyone’s going to be talking about how we came back together.”

“Good thing I don’t give a shit about what people say, right? Should’ve thought that through before inviting me,” Jake shrugged, finally lowering his phone to look at you. His nonchalant attitude was pissing you off. “Plus, this all just looks worse because Ryujin decided she wanted to spend one last week with whatever his name was.”

He wasn’t wrong. It hadn’t just been the two of you in Monaco for three months; Ryujin had also been very much present. However, she found herself a summer fling named Louis, and unlike you and Jake, she couldn’t find herself boarding your private jet without spending one last fiery week with her lover before saying goodbye for good and starting school again.

“Maybe we should have just stayed an extra week with her. It probably would have saved us from the shit show that I know we’re gonna be bombarded with the second we step off the plane.” You released a deep sigh before you started to gather your belongings around you.

Jake followed suit, grabbing his stuff and getting up from his seat. “Well, if we stayed back an extra week, then that would mean we’d have to deal with your mom’s wrath for missing her annual end-of-summer garden party that we promised we wouldn’t miss. You know how important it is for her, and to be honest, I’d rather face Heeseung’s wrath than your mom’s.”

He was right. This garden party of hers had been going on every year since even before you were born, and you’d be out of your mind to miss it. It was single-handedly the most important event every year for your family, and you couldn’t even begin to fathom how your mom would react to your absence.

You reached over and snatched the champagne glass out of his hand before you downed whatever was left in it in one gulp as you braced yourself, hoping the alcohol would give you the courage you needed to step off the plane. 

“Well, then I hope you’re prepared to take on Heeseung. Maybe he’ll be nice enough to spare your pretty face. God knows it’s the only thing you have going for you.”

Heeseung was going to fucking kill Jake Sim. 

When he woke up this morning, you were the last thing on his mind, something he seemed to have finally freed himself from. However, all the hard work he put into casting you away from his mind seemed to have been in vain, as now all he could think about was you and how you had returned after three months of radio silence with the guy you cheated on him with.

Livid didn’t even cover what he was feeling, and it was evident in the way he swung his club. Each hit seemed to be driven by a surge of pent-up frustration.

“What the hell, man? That’s the third time today you’ve been way off course. What’s going on?” Jay shot him an incredulous look as he tried to locate where the golf ball had landed.

Heeseung let out a frustrated groan as he ripped off his glove and shoved his driver back into his bag. “Y/N’s fucking back.”

That was all Jay needed to hear to understand what was going on with his friend. "Shit, I saw. I’m sorry dude, it’s fucked up."

Heeseung was in no mindset to be playing golf right now. All he wanted was to go back home and wallow miserably in his bed. Unfortunately, they were only on hole ten of eighteen, and judging by his performance today, Heeseung knew it was going to take awhile.

"Did you know?" Heeseung couldn't help but blurt out, his frustration evident in his voice as he watched Jay effortlessly swing a shot miles better than his own.

Confusion flickered across Jay's face as he turned to face his friend. "What do you mean?"

“Did you know that she was coming back with Jake?” Heeseung felt his jaw tense as he mentioned his ex-friend.

“I didn’t even know he was with her until today. Honestly, I thought he’d just fucked off somewhere and didn’t bother telling any of us, considering how things went down. You know me, I would’ve told you straight up if I had found out earlier.” Heeseung trusted Jay implicitly. He was as loyal as they came, but unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for everyone in their friend group.

"Do you think Sunghoon knew?" Heeseung's question elicited an audible groan from Jay.

If anyone in their friend group knew how Jake spent his summer, it would undoubtedly be Sunghoon. However, Sunghoon was notoriously tight-lipped, especially when it came to sensitive matters. Since the breakup, the entire friend group had undergone an incredibly awkward shift. It seemed that everyone had more or less chosen a side, and allegiances were clear.

"You know he wouldn't tell us anything if he did. It's getting ridiculous. The other day, I saw Gaeul and him having brunch or something at the clubhouse, and the moment she spotted me, she practically sprinted over to explain herself. She claimed she's still 'Switzerland' in the whole situation and hasn't chosen a side," Jay recounted, frustration evident in his voice. 

Heeseung almost snorted at the absurdity of it all. Their friend group had never been one to keep secrets or tiptoe around each other, but the last few months had been nothing but that. The betrayal by you and Jake had not only affected Heeseung's relationship with you but had also tainted the dynamic of their entire friend group.

“Literally, what is there to be ‘Switzerland’ about? I mean, this whole thing isn’t even complicated. Everyone saw them go into the bathroom together and come out literally holding hands. Trust me, I know what she looks like after giving head, and that's literally what she looked like in that video Beomgyu sent. Plus, Karina literally heard them.” Heeseung angrily got into the golf cart as Jay fished the keys out to start driving.

“Okay, well, no offense, but in all honesty, Karina’s probably not the most reliable source, cause she’s in an extremely biased position, but I guess that’s beside the point.” Jay’s words seemed to instantly bring a frown upon Heeseung’s face.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Heeseung’s tone sharply switched up in an almost defensive manner.

Jay, feeling this shift, nervously cleared his throat as he stammered, trying his best not to offend his already sensitive friend regarding an even more fragile situation. “I mean, uh, well. You know…”

“What?” The grip he had on the seat of the golf cart seemed to get tighter as he waited for his friend to elaborate.

“Dude, you can't be serious? You know Karina’s been trying to ride your dick for the past, what, give or take ten years? I mean, we all know that she’s never had a good relationship with Y/N, and I’m pretty sure most of that resentment stemmed from the fact that you’ve always been head over heels for Y/N.” Jay slowly parked the cart and turned off the engine as he explained.

Still not understanding Jay’s point, Heeseung furrowed his brows, shooting his friend another annoyed look before getting out of the golf cart. “What are you trying to get at?”

“Jesus fucking Christ, you’re dense. I mean, the last couple of months before Y/N cheated on you was the closest you seemed to have gotten with Karina because of that final project that you guys had or whatever. I mean, you were with her more times than you were with your own girlfriend, and knowing Karina, she seems like she could be delusional enough to have maybe taken that as a sign that you were interested in her? I mean, this is all speculation, but I’m just letting you know what we all saw.”

Jay cautiously treaded this topic. Heeseung was his best friend since they were babies, and he would always be on his side, but Karina was never anyone’s favorite with her extremely polarizing personality. He had no allegiance towards her, not to mention that she wasn’t actually even in their friend group and always only ever found lingering around wherever Heeseung was, so it was much easier for Jay to actually see through her. In fact, it seemed that all of their friends could pretty much catch on to Karina’s end goal except Heeseung.

“So you think it’s my fault that Y/N cheated on me?” The air got tense as Heeseung snapped at Jay while snatching his 7-iron out of the bag. “Just because I spent some time doing a stupid fucking school project with Karina doesn’t mean it gives her reason to go and suck off one of my best friends.”

Jay shook his head even before Heeseung was done with his sentence. Heeseung seemed to not be getting the point. “Fuck no, dude, that’s not what I’m saying. Karina has an incentive: you. If she gets rid of Y/N, then it means you’re up for grabs. Of course, Karina didn’t force Y/N to get on her knees for Sim, but she was the first one to come running, telling us what happened even before Beomgyu sent that video.” Heeseung was trying hard to focus on trying to get his ball on the green as he geared up to swing while listening to Jay.

“So you don’t think she should’ve warned me of what she heard?” He swung precisely, but it seemed that this whole course, to be precise, wasn’t going easy on him. He’d be lucky to get even a double bogey on the par-4.

Jay slightly grimaced at Heeseung’s shot. “No, it’s not that,” he let out a sigh as he walked over to Heeseung. “Look, you’ve been my best friend for as long as I can remember, and I know the past few months have been fucking hard because of what Y/N put you through, and I just want you to be careful. Karina’s always been kind of a conniving, spoiled bitch who finds a way to get what she wants. Just because she’s been warming your bed every night since Y/N fell off the fucking Earth doesn’t mean she should be someone you start trusting.”

There was nothing he could say back to his friend’s words and it seemed that what Jay had said clung on deep to Heeseung's thoughts throughout the day, casting a lingering shadow and leaving a bitter aftertaste in his mind.

A small bead of sweat trickled down your back as the sun's relentless heat beat down on you. You took a small sip from your now lukewarm glass of champagne, its warmth doing little to refresh you. Today felt even hotter than previous years, and once again, you found yourself questioning why your mother insisted on hosting her most important event during the hottest month of the year.

Your cheeks were hurting from all the forced smiles you’d already given to family friends and important figures in your mother’s business circle. This garden party was always about promoting her upcoming collection and ensuring the continued support, financial and otherwise (not that she needed any more money), of both new and old acquaintances and partners. So, as always, it was no surprise that you were dressed head to toe in unveiled pieces from your mother’s upcoming collection. While no one could deny her incredible eye for fashion and the breathtaking quality of her creations, the white-tiered tulle dress with its plunging neckline felt entirely too inappropriate for a garden party and was getting on your last nerve. You stood out like a peacock—a testament to your mother’s outstanding handiwork—but you weren't a fan of the attention it drew.

“I need to get out of this fucking dress,” you muttered through gritted teeth, your annoyance palpable. 

Jake chuckled softly beside you. “I can think of a few ways to get you out of that.” 

You shot him a sharp look, clearly unimpressed by his insinuation. “Don’t say shit like that, especially around everyone. It’s not funny.”

“What? No one's around to hear, and even if they did, it wouldn’t matter. Everyone already thinks we’re fucking, and to be fair, they’re not that off.” He shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips. 

Without hesitation, you elbowed him hard in the ribs, your face growing even more pissed off. “That’s not funny, Jake. Seriously, shut up. It happened only a couple of times and that’s it. If anyone hears that, they’re actually going to think I cheated on Heeseung with you.” 

Your pretty face sported a cold, serious expression, leaving no doubt about how much this mattered to you.

“Honey, I told you, they already think you cheated on Heeseung with me, so this isn’t going to change anything. Besides, you know damn well it wasn’t just a couple of times,” Jake rolled his eyes at your dramatics.

“Yeah, well, the difference is that every time I slept with you was when I wasn’t dating him, so I didn’t actually cheat. You’re just making everything worse by making it seem like you’re confirming what they already assume.” Your irritation was through the roof, and the heat was doing nothing to quell your annoyance.

Before Jake could say anything else, your mother’s saccharine voice filled the space. For once, you were grateful for her impeccable timing. “Oh, darling, I’ve been looking everywhere for you!”

The event’s dress code was always an all-white affair, but even then, your mother seemed to shine brighter than any of the guests. You were almost taken aback when you fully turned to face her. “Hey, Mom.”

You flashed her a tight smile, but she barely spared you a glance, her attention focused entirely on the figure next to you. Jake seemed to stiffen under your mother’s gaze. “Hello, Jake. You seem to be enjoying yourself,” she said, giving his attire a quick once-over and humming in approval. “You look quite nice. Brioni, I’m assuming?”

“Yes, as usual, the event is beautiful Mrs. L/N. You’ve definitely outdone yourself,” he nervously chuckled. Despite his attempts at flattery, your mother’s cold gaze remained fixed on him. “And you’re right, it is a custom piece from Brioni.”

“Unsurprising, seeing that your father is rarely seen in anything else. Perhaps you could enlighten him to broaden his wardrobe, and maybe we can see about getting you a custom piece of mine. I have no doubt the materials I use are incomparable to much of what’s in your wardrobe already. Though, I’m sure you already know that, since it seems much of your time these days is spent taking my beautiful pieces off my daughter.”

“Mom!” You gasped loudly, your eyes widening in disbelief at her bold statement. Your mother was never one to hold back her words, but this was beyond her usual antics. Next to you, Jake stiffened even more, nervously trying to regain his composure.

"Uh, Mrs. Y/LN, I can assure you that whatever you think is happening between me and your daughter is not actually true," Jake stammered, his voice strained with tension.

Your mother clicked her tongue in annoyance, obviously not buying his claims. "Well, the conversation I overheard the two of you having before I came seemed to say something different."

“Mom, can we not do this here?” You darted your eyes around, making sure that no one else was catching on to what was happening.

“Well, darling, I would usually never impose myself like this in your personal relationships, but it seems like the two of you have brought not only our families into this but now also my business as collateral just for the sake of some mindless fucking.”

You had never heard your mother speak with such scandalous vocabulary before. Seeing her like this was beyond unsettling and left you utterly speechless.  

“Ma’am, I assure you that the rumors about our infidelity are not true at all. It’s been a huge misunderstanding that—"

"Jake, I've always held you in high regard, ever since you were a baby raised alongside my daughter. You've grown into a very smart and handsome young man, one your parents should be proud of. Out of respect for your mother, who you know is one of my closest and longest friends, I've tried to overlook what's been happening over the past few months. However, overhearing the two of you brazenly talking about your sexcapades in public, especially during one of the most important events of my year, is something I simply cannot ignore. This has not only strained my relationship with one of my closest business partners, but it has also jeopardized our families' standing. If anyone else had overheard, I can’t even begin to think how much worse the already damaging rumors would become."

“Mom seriously can you stop this,” you were furious that she would decide to do this here of all places. “This is fucking ridiculous and you know damn well that none of those stupid rumors are true. We can talk about this later, please.”

"I believe I'm entitled to speak as I please, especially considering this is my event," she retorted sharply. "Your father and I were generous enough to allow you to spend your entire summer break away without expecting you to address this mess you've created for us. I had hoped for better judgment from you. Instead, you and Jake decided to further exacerbate this situation by turning this trip into some sort of romantic getaway. I sure hope you were at least being smart and careful. The only thing that would make this situation worse is if you were to become pregnant. Who knows, you might even be pregnant right now. It wouldn’t even surprise me seeing as though that seems to be the only thing the two of you were doing in Monaco.” 

Jake was a stuttering mess, his face flushed with embarrassment at the accusation. "Mrs. Y/LN, I swear that's not true," he managed to stammer out.

Before he could say anything else, your mother cut him off again. "I'm not so sure I can trust you on that. How can you be so sure that you didn't knock up my daughter?"

You were seething with anger at your mother's behavior, ready to intervene when suddenly a figure caught your eye. 

Heeseung's fist connected with Jake's jaw before you even had a chance to react. The punch caught Jake off guard, and as he tried to recover, Heeseung landed another swift blow to his face. 

"You got her pregnant?" Heeseung's voice was filled with anger as he launched himself at Jake, who was still reeling from the first two punches.

“What the fuck!” Jake groaned, struggling to fend off Heeseung's relentless assault.

Beside you, your mother was in a panic, shouting for security as everyone's attention turned to the commotion that erupted in front of you.

Before you could step in, Jay appeared out of nowhere, desperately trying to pull his friend away from their former friend.

"Heeseung, stop!" you screamed, rushing to Jay's aid.

But Heeseung was relentless, disregarding his surroundings entirely. All sense of decorum was abandoned as he straddled Jake, who was attempting to dodge Heeseung's blows while pushing him away.

From the other side, Sunghoon came running over to help pull Heeseung off of Jake. "Jesus Christ, Heeseung, get off him!"

After a couple of seconds of struggle, the three of you were finally able to pull Heeseung off of Jake, though he continued to struggle in attempts to break free. Security, called by your mother, arrived and joined in to help restrain the enraged boy.

Jake laid on the grass, his previously pristine custom white suit dirtied with splatters of blood and dirt from rolling around. Heeseung didn't look much better, his own suit now stained with blood, evidence of the fight. Despite being at a disadvantage, Jake had managed to land a few good punches, evidenced by the blood dripping from Heeseung’s nose. It was a chaotic scene, with whispers and murmurs from the other guests confirming their attention on the altercation. You could sense your mother's fury, even without seeing her directly.

"What the hell is this?" A gruff voice angrily interrogated.

Heeseung’s father had never been an easy person to be around, so you couldn’t even imagine how angry he currently was at his son’s behavior.

However, Heeseung seemed not to hear his father, his eyes staying trained on Jake, who was getting up with Sunghoon's help.

“Oh my, Liz, I am so sorry. I’m appalled; I genuinely am. I'm so embarrassed. I don’t know what came over him.” Heeseung’s mom quickly ran over to where your mother stood with fury and attempted to sincerely apologize.

“We are leaving.” Heeseung’s dad yanked his son from the security’s grip and started to drag him away, but not before also turning towards your mom with a stern look. “Yes, we apologize for our son’s behavior. We hope it didn’t ruin this beautiful event, and we will be excusing ourselves. Thank you for having us.”

You were still in shock with everything, and it seemed that everyone else was too, as no one moved and stood in silence, taking in everything that had happened. There was no way this just happened.

To say the last couple of days had been hell for you would be an understatement. Honestly, it felt even worse than the days following your breakup with Heeseung, when you could at least pack your bags and leave the country. But this time, with school starting in a week, that luxury would unfortunately not be granted to you a second time. Your parents were adamant that you face the mess head-on and frankly you found yourself wishing that you never returned from Monaco.

To make matters worse, Ryujin still wasn’t back. While she called every day, you still felt alone, especially since you hadn’t talked to Jake since your mom’s party. Rumors about your supposed pregnancy were rampant, further emphasizing your alleged infidelity, and you figured it was best to get some space from Jake until the rumors died down.

With nothing to do, you found yourself doing things you’d never normally do—like wandering down the chip aisle, looking for something to make you feel better about your situation.

“No, Ryujin, you don’t get it,” you huffed into the phone, frustration evident in your voice as you searched desperately for anything that sounded good. “I’ve gotten DMs from random people I’ve barely spoken to, asking if I’m actually pregnant and how far along I am. I’m so fucking sick of this.”

“Oh babe, I’m so sorry. This sucks so bad. It’s literally so fucking absurd and Heeseung was so stupid for this like I still can’t believe he did that.  Don’t worry though, I’ll be there soon so just hold on,” Ryujin sounded sincere as the sound of waves echoed in the background. You envied your friend, who was probably at the beach right now, getting a nice tan with her hot beau, and not miserably suffering in this stupid predicament like you were.

“Ugh, I can’t wait until you’re here. I’m like seriously going through it and I just hope it’ll die down once school starts, but I doubt it because—”

“Y/N?” 

You were abruptly cut off by a shrill voice. Even before you turned your head to face them, you knew exactly who it was and found yourself unable to hold back an exasperated groan. “Fuck, I’ll call you later, Ryujin.”

Karina had always been one of the most beautiful girls you knew, even from a young age and you couldn’t deny that she looked stunning now, even under the horrendously yellow dim lights of the grocery store. But, like always, she had a knack for bringing out a grimace on your face, which you sported as you turned to face her.

“Oh my God, no way! I thought it was you earlier but I was like, no way is The Y/N out shopping for groceries. But honestly, who else could it be? I mean, you’re unmistakable.” Karina held a shopping basket in one hand that barely had anything in it. She was dressed like she was about to attend a charity gala, a stark contrast to your Lululemon shorts and an old shirt from Heeseung’s closet.

“Hey, Karina,” was all you could let out before she animatedly started speaking again, not giving you a second to talk. 

"It's been so long! I mean, how long has it been since we last saw each other? You didn’t even say goodbye to any of us and just left but you look great, especially considering—oh, and congrats! Honestly, I was actually worried it would be awkward between us, but once I heard the news, all my worries disappeared. You and Jake seem so happy together, and you have no idea how thrilled I was when I heard that you guys are about to start a family. It’s so cute and I now know that there's no reason for me to worry about you getting mad about me and Heeseung. Although I was a little surprised your boyfriend attacked mine like that, but I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding.” 

Karina spoke without pausing, giving you no time to digest her words and she didn’t seem to notice your growing annoyance as she continued to babble with that smug look on her face.

“Wait hold on, you and Heeseung are dating?” There was no way you heard her right.

But it seemed that you did as she nodded with a bright smile on her face. “Yeah it’s still kind of new only a couple of months but it’s been amazing. I mean I’m sure you know just as well that he’s like literally the best.” Her voice slowly drowned out as you took everything in. A couple of months ago was literally when you left for Monaco so it meant that Heeseung didn’t waste any time to make Karina his girlfriend. 

“What the fuck, Karina?” You didn’t hold back, making sure she knew you were beyond enraged at this new revelation.

Her face held a surprised expression as you cut her off abruptly. “I’m sorry, but what do you mean?”

You rolled your eyes. You knew she understood exactly what you were talking about, and it infuriated you that she was pretending otherwise. You knew Karina too well; she was reveling in the fact that she currently had something you didn’t for the first time in her life.

“Drop the act, Karina. I don’t have time for this shit. We both know exactly what you’re trying to do, and it’s pathetic. You and your friends can call me a slut for supposedly cheating on Heeseung, but it’s rich coming from you when you and Heeseung literally did the same thing. Not to mention the fact that you two didn’t even wait a decent amount of time before getting together after he and I broke up. So honestly, I hope you’re both happy and sincerely, fuck you both.” 

You didn't bother to stick around to hear whatever else she had to say. As you turned and walked away, you felt your eyes welling up with tears. You thought you were over Heeseung, but clearly, that wasn’t the case. The revelation of his new relationship pulled at your heartstrings, making you wonder if you ever really mattered to him the way he did to you. Nothing hurt more than realizing that the two year-long relationship you cherished above all else might have been a joke to him.

“Ryujin, I really don’t think I’m up for going out,” you sighed, looking at yourself in the mirror. Ryujin, on the other side of the room, was finishing her makeup at the vanity.

“No way, I told you, you’re not staying holed up moping around because of Heeseung again. You already did that in Monaco, and I’m not letting you waste any more time on that asshole. You’re coming out with us, and you are going to have an amazing night.”

Ryujin had finally come back the day before, and while having her by your side made you feel better, you couldn’t stop thinking about your ex.

“I seriously doubt one night of drinking and partying will make Heeseung disappear from my thoughts,” you muttered, rolling your eyes. You knew Ryujin would end up dragging you out, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t complain the whole time.

“I think you’re underestimating the power of a good night out. Who knows, maybe you’ll find some hottie to get your mind off everything,” Ryujin shrugged while spritzing perfume. “Maybe you should go looking for Jake.”

You shook your head at her. “Jake’s not going to help.”

“Well actually, from what I remember I think Jake helped a good bit with speeding up the process of you getting over moping about Heeseung a couple of months ago so who’s to say that it won’t work this time?” 

“I am not sleeping with Jake again. That would literally make everything like so much worse. Everyone already thinks I’m pregnant with his kid. I don’t need more things to fuel that rumor.”

Ryujin wasn’t wrong about your summer situationship with Jake helping to distract you, but continuing it back here would only add fuel to the fire. Not to mention, your relationship with Jake was purely platonic with some sexual attraction. That was all it ever was even back in high school, and you had both talked at length about how neither of you saw a relationship beyond friendship. So even if you went to him looking for something more, Jake ultimately wouldn’t be able to give you what you wanted.

“Well then there’s other people! What about-” You cut her off abruptly.

You cut her off abruptly. “Ryujin, I know you’re just trying to help, and I really do appreciate it, but I just think sleeping with other people isn’t going to solve anything. I just want to lay low this semester and focus on school. I don’t want to be wrapped up in more drama.” Done with the conversation, you grabbed your purse, suddenly more eager to get to the party if it meant changing the subject.

“Ready to go?” you asked, and just like that, her eyes lit up and a wide, giddy smile spread across her face as she eagerly followed you out.

The Uber ride was short, and before you knew it, you had arrived. Hyunjin was known for throwing the best parties, and tonight was no exception. The massive manor, which you were all too familiar with, was already buzzing with more people than you imagined his parents would ever find acceptable.

“Hey, there you guys are!” Ryujin’s close friend Yujin, who you were also friendly with, excitedly ran over to greet you both. She had been studying abroad for 6 months and you hadn’t seen her since so you were even more elated to see her. 

“Hey, Yujin! It’s been a while! You and Sunoo looked like you were having the time of your lives in Italy.” You greeted her warmly, following her inside as she led you to where all the drinks were.

“Oh yeah, it was beyond amazing, but I’m sure nothing compares to Monaco. God, I haven’t been there in ages.” She poured out shots and passed them to you and Ryujin. Without hesitation, the three of you knocked them back, grimacing slightly at the aftertaste.

“Fuck, I already miss it. It took like an hour to say goodbye to Louis, and I was so upset for the first 30 minutes of the plane ride. But the good thing about summer flings is that after the goodbyes, there's nothing left to hold onto, so it’s easy to get over.” Ryujin poured another shot for both of you while Yujin reached for a can of Ranch Water.

“I literally thought they were going to try something serious since she was with him all summer. Half the time, I couldn’t even find her because she and Louis were off somewhere, but I guess he really was just a summer fling.” You nudged your friend as Yujin let out an amused giggle.

“I bet! Those pics on your most recent Insta post, man, they were hot. What about you, Y/N? Any European hotties catch your eye?” Yujin wiggled her brows, and you rolled your eyes while reaching behind her for a can of Ranch Water.

“More like an Australian hottie,” Ryujin teased, and you instantly elbowed her.

“Jesus Christ, Ryujin, seriously shut up.” You shot her an annoyed look.

Yujin, however, seemed to find amusement in Ryujin’s remark as she gave you a wide-eyed look while giggling. “No way, so it’s true then?”

“Fuck no. I mean yeah, we hooked up, but I swear to God I’m not pregnant.” You shook your head vehemently.

You saw Yujin open her mouth, but Ryujin beat her to it, grabbing your arm. “Don’t turn around.”

Your brows furrowed at her panicked actions, and you started to turn your head, but she quickly stopped you. “What? What happened?”

“Fuck, Heeseung’s here,” Yujin answered, her eyes darting around past your head. “He’s over there near the pool table. Don’t turn around.”

You stood still, heart racing, as you listened to your friends' directions. You saw Ryujin's expression shift from panic to a scowl.

“And he brought Karina. She’s stuck on him like a fucking leech,” Ryujin sneered. Even before the summer, Ryujin had always been Karina’s number one hater, so her reaction was no surprise.

Quickly, you decided it would be best to leave the area, and the girls seemed to think the same as the three of you started to move. But before you could take a step out of the kitchen, a booming voice caught your attention.

“Y/N!” Sunghoon’s voice echoed through the music, loud enough for everyone in the vicinity to hear. You stiffened as you realized your presence was now exposed to everyone.

“Fuck, it’s been a long time!” He approached with a massive smile and, before you could even respond, engulfed you in a tight hug. Behind him, you spotted Jake trailing close by, rolling his eyes at his friend.

"Hey, Sunghoon," you greeted him back, debating whether to reciprocate the hug he wasn't letting go of.

"Okay, buddy, that's enough," Jake intervened, yanking his friend back.

"Oh, princess, you got even prettier while you were away! If that's even possible, but damn, you look amazing," Sunghoon's red, dopey eyes hinted at his intoxicated state.

"He's crossed," Jake confirmed, as if reading your mind.

"Oh God, why did you let him do that again?" Ryujin scolded Jake, delivering a disapproving look along with a smack on his arm.

"What the fuck! I'm not his babysitter," Jake retorted, shooting Ryujin a pointed look.

"Well, he is your best friend," you shrugged.

"I'm totally fine, you guys worry too much," Sunghoon shot everyone a smile before reaching for the drink in your hand, which you quickly pulled away.

"Yeah, Sunghoon, maybe lay off the drinking and smoking for now. I think I still have the video from the last time you got crossed," Yujin remarked, raising a skeptical brow at his current state. The mention of the video drew snorts of amusement from everyone except Sunghoon.

Instead, Sunghoon's eyes widened at her words, shaking his head vigorously. "I swear that won’t happen tonight."

"Well, it might if you keep this up," Ryujin added, recalling the infamous incident the last time Sunghoon was in this state. It involved projectile vomiting on a girl followed by passing out on her, effectively ruining any chance he might have had with her.

"Whatever," Sunghoon rolled his eyes, turning away, but before he could even take a step, he turned right back around (unsteadily with Jake stepping in to steady him), and blurted out, "Heeseung's here."

You could hear Jake cursing under his breath at Sunghoon’s words, while Ryujin nodded.

"Yeah, we were trying to sneak out of the kitchen before they noticed us, and then you had to go and yell Y/N’s name," Ryujin added.

"Oh," Sunghoon sheepishly nodded. "My bad."

"Does he have to fucking bring her everywhere?" Jake muttered, casting another glance towards where Heeseung and Karina were.

"You know, I even heard Jay’s getting sick of her tagging along everywhere."

"Where’d you hear that?" You shot Sunghoon a suspicious look.

“Gaeul.”

"She still hangs out with them?" Ryujin scoffed, clearly annoyed.

"She claims to be the neutral party between us."

“So she’s still being a fucking dumbass?” Ryujin shot back, clearly unimpressed with their friend’s stance.

"Well, she still reports everything back to us, so it's not all bad," Jake tried to reason, but Ryujin wasn't buying it.

From next to you, Yujin chuckled. "Your friend group is so fucking messy, thank God I'm not involved. I'm going to find Hyunjin for some weed. Good luck sorting out your drama." She shot you a wink before briskly walking away before anyone could respond.

"Are we really that messy?" Sunghoon asked innocently, but before anyone could answer, he vomited everywhere.

You were cursing under your breath as you tried to wash the puke out of your shorts, fuming at Park Sunghoon. Thankfully, they were black, so staining wasn't an issue, but standing in your underwear in a house party bathroom, scrubbing your pants instead of enjoying the night, was infuriating. Even if you managed to clean them, you'd be stuck wearing damp pants for the rest of the night.

As you wrung out the fabric, desperate to dry them as much as possible, the bathroom door suddenly swung open.

“Oh! Sorry— Y/N?” Heeseung’s eyes widened in surprise when he realized not only that someone was already in the bathroom but that it was you.

In your haste to escape Sunghoon's vomit, you must have forgotten to lock the door. Naturally, Heeseung had to be the one to barge in.

The two of you stood there awkwardly, each taking in the other's appearance. It was technically your first real encounter since your return, discounting the brief moment at your mother's garden party before Heeseung was promptly escorted away by his parents.

He looked way too good, enough to stir butterflies in your stomach. It was unsettling how Heeseung could still have this effect on you after everything that had happened.

"Hey, Y/N," he greeted cautiously, breaking the silence. The tension in the room was palpable.

"Hey, Heeseung," you replied, unsure of how to navigate the awkwardness.

"Sunghoon was right," he blurted out abruptly, his words coming out in a rush before he could stop himself.

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. "What?"

"I-I mean, he said... that you look even prettier now," Heeseung stumbled over his words, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "I mean, not that you weren't pretty before, but, um... yeah." 

Your cheeks warmed at his unexpected compliment. This wasn't how you had imagined your first conversation with him after coming back would go. 

"Uh, thanks."

A few more uncomfortable seconds ticked by before Heeseung finally seemed to notice your state. "Uh, what are you doing?"

You had completely forgotten about your current attire—just in your underwear, a lacy black thong that had driven Heeseung wild a few months ago.

"Oh, Sunghoon threw up on me after getting crossed," you explained, shaking your head in annoyance as you returned to wringing out your shorts.

"Again? Fuck, he really needs to learn not to do that. If he had a nickel for every time he puked on a pretty girl while he was crossed, he'd have two," Heeseung remarked, a hint of amusement in his voice. You couldn't help but let out a small laugh. There was no way you were actually laughing at your cheating ex’s jokes. 

Heeseung seemed to relax a bit upon hearing your giggles, joining in with a laugh of his own.

"Here, let me help. There's probably a dryer around here somewhere," he offered, finally deciding to step into the bathroom as he closed the door behind him. He bent down, rifling through a couple of cabinets until he found what he was looking for.

"Fuck, I don't know why I didn't think of that earlier," you muttered, taking the dryer from him and plugging it in before switching it on.

He reached over to hold your shorts for you while you dried them. After a few minutes, you turned off the dryer, confident your shorts were dry enough by now. "Thanks," you said, taking them from him.

As you looked up at him, you suddenly became aware of the closeness between the two of you. Your breath caught in your throat as your eyes locked with his.

Fuck he was hot.

You could feel the all-too-familiar warmth spreading throughout your body as the two of you held each other's gaze, neither daring to look away. Slowly, almost as if guided by muscle memory, you inched your faces closer until you could feel his breath on your lips, poised to kiss him. But a small voice in your head stopped you before you could fully lean in.

“Wait.” 

Heeseung instantly pulled back. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

"No, no it's not that. I can’t do that to Karina," you hurriedly explained, shaking your head. Tears threatened to spill over as the pain of Heeseung's past betrayal resurfaced. Despite any animosity toward Karina, you couldn't bring yourself to inflict that same hurt on anyone else.

"What?" Heeseung furrowed his brows, confusion etched across his face as he looked at you.

"Heeseung, you can't just fucking cheat on her after you cheated on me with her!" You shot him an incredulous look, unable to believe how close he had come to infidelity once again.

His head shook vehemently, confusion clouding his eyes. "What do you mean? If anything, you're the one who's cheating!"

"Jesus Christ, for the last fucking time, I'm not dating Jake!" You yelled in frustration.

“And I’m not dating Karina!”

The two of you stared at each other, mutual confusion now evident, leaving you both speechless.

“What?” 

"Yeah, I'm not dating her! And what do you mean you're not dating Jake?" Heeseung shot back, equally bewildered.

"I literally saw her a couple of days ago, and she told me the two of you had been dating for a couple of months," you said, watching Heeseung shake his head in disbelief.

"What the fuck! She's fucking lying, we are not dating, let alone have been dating. That fucking bitch, literally what the fuck," Heeseung was beyond pissed.

You scoffed, equally heated. "Karina was literally rubbing it in my face about how happy you two were. And for your information, I have never dated Jake."

"What the fuck, Y/N? I fucking punched him!" Heeseung felt like he was going insane. Everything he had believed for the past few months was suddenly a lie.

You rolled your eyes at his outburst. "Yeah, I fucking know. I was there, if you remember! He still has a fucking split lip because of you, and my mom's still beyond mad about it."

You had to be lying, Heeseung couldn’t believe your words. “There’s no fucking way.”

“Yeah you fucking dumbass, you beat him up for nothing.” 

“Wait, wait, wait no it’s still fucking justified! He was one of my best friends who went on and fucking slept with my girlfriend!” There was no way the two of you were actually having this conversation at a raging party after not seeing each other for three months.

"No, he didn't! Or at least not while we were dating, and I'm also not fucking pregnant!" Your voice echoed in the cramped bathroom. You were still intoxicated and could feel a headache coming on. 

"Fuck you! Literally, everyone saw you two that night," Heeseung retorted sharply, but before he could continue, it seemed he fully absorbed your words, his eyes narrowing in disbelief. "So you have been fucking Jake!"

"Yeah, but only after we broke up, not before! And you can't be acting all innocent when you've literally been with Karina!" You were annoyed by his accusatory tone. He was such a fucking hypocrite.

"Okay, but I didn't blatantly sleep with her at a party while we were still together like you did—"

You cut him off by smashing your lips against his, needing to silence him in any way possible. You couldn't stand another moment of arguing about this.

You could feel Heeseung freeze for a second, taken aback by your action, but he quickly recovered as you could feel his lips move against yours. 

There was nothing romantic about the kiss as the two of you hungrily pushed back against each other, fighting for dominance. Teeth clashed against each other as your tongues battled back and forth and you could barely breathe, but it seemed that neither of you considered stopping anytime soon. 

His hands quickly found themselves ripping your top off you as yours went straight down to undo his pants and push them down. You finally pulled away from the kiss to spit on your hand before going straight back into his lips. Not a second was spared to think about your actions as you didn’t hesitate to stick your hand down his underwear. He was already half-hard and you quickly wrapped your hand around his length, inciting a groan out of him. 

While one hand worked on pushing down his underwear the other worked on pumping him. Heeseung was in almost the same state as one of his hands was found groping at your boobs, playing with your nipple, while the other also attempted to pull your underwear down.

As soon as your thong reached mid-thigh, Heeseung quickly broke the kiss to turn you around and roughly push you down against the bathroom counter. You jolted at the cold counter pressing against your already sensitive nipples but Heeseung pushed down hard on your back so you couldn’t lift yourself up. You looked helpless in the mirror and without warning you felt his dick plunging deep inside of you.

You gasped at the intrusion. Sharp pain erupted within you as tears welled in your eyes and you could do nothing except tightly squeeze them shut while your hands desperately attempted to grab at anything to hold on to. Heeseung had started to fuck you without even giving you a second to adjust and your cries filled the bathroom. 

You hadn’t been fucked like this in so long and sure Jake was a freak in bed with a big dick but he had never considered fucking you before making sure you were prepped. No, this was Heeseung’s specialty. He fucking loved it and you couldn’t help but also find yourself loving the pain that came with his pleasure. 

“Fucking slut, look at yourself,” Heeseung growled in your ear before roughly grabbing your hair and pulling it back, forcing you to face yourself in the mirror. 

“Please, Heeseung,” you could barely moan out. 

His hand gripped your hip so tightly that he knew bruises from his fingers were sure to be left afterward and his eyes were crazed as he battered himself even harder against your cervix, giving you no respite.

“What? What else could you want, I’m already fucking you. Greedy whore.” You felt yourself clench tighter around him as you heard his words. You were almost there as you could feel the tight coil just about ready to snap.

“Oh fuck, Heeseung harder,” you screamed. 

Heeseung did just as you asked and as if it was possible, you felt him force himself even deeper inside you at a faster pace. You knew he was battering deep at your cervix, but you were too focused on chasing your orgasm that you couldn’t even care for the dull aching pain. His hand in your hair pushed your head against the mirror and you found yourself unable to stop yourself from drooling and fogging up the mirror. His animalistic grunts filled your ear and the grip in your hair got tighter. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You screamed out as the coil snapped and you felt yourself reaching your ultimate high. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you slumped against the mirror, having no strength to hold yourself up.

Heeseung was also close as you felt his cock twitch inside you and before you knew it, warm spurts of cum painted inside of you as you felt him thrust a couple of more times while he panted. He came so much that you could even feel some drip down the inside of your thighs.

“Fuck,” he breathed out as he slowly pulled out, watching his cum drip out of you and land on the bathroom floor. 

You were still slumped against the mirror, attempting to catch your breath and process what had just happened.

As your eyes connected with Heeseung’s through the mirror, a rush of emotions overwhelmed you. The weight of what the two of you had just done bore down on you, and shame began to smother you, making you feel like you were suffocating. You couldn't stay there with him a moment longer. Quickly, you dressed yourself, doing your best to ignore the aching pain between your legs. Heeseung looked confused by your sudden change, but before he could say anything, you were out the door, leaving him to dwell on the implications of your actions.

You honestly hadn’t been listening to anything Ryujin had been saying for the past couple of minutes as she rambled on. Instead, you stared at the piece of salmon on your plate, analyzing each line that ran through the fish. If you didn’t focus on this, your mind would start drifting back to what happened yesterday, and you'd rather shoot yourself in the foot than think about that.

“Hey, Y/N, are you even listening?” Ryujin raised her voice, trying to get your attention.

Snapping out of it, you finally took your eyes away from your dinner and looked up at her. “Oh, sorry, I got distracted.”

“Yeah, no shit. I’ve been talking to you, and you went catatonic or something. What is up with you?” She furrowed her brows at your unusual behavior.

“Nothing, I’m fine,” you quickly responded, but you knew the second she put her utensils down that she wasn’t buying it.

“Don’t fucking try to lie to me. I can see through your bullshit. What’s wrong?” Her gaze was intense, analyzing you as if there would be an external sign explaining your strange behavior.

You sighed, debating whether to tell her exactly what had happened. Deciding against it, you realized that if you opened that can of worms, things would get even messier. “Uhm, I don’t know, I guess I’m just still hungover.”

“You didn’t even drink that much yesterday, though,” she said, brows still furrowed. She had noticed you hadn’t come out of your room all day and had to literally drag you out just to get dinner with her.

“Are you sick? You don’t really look sick though.”

You shook your head, searching for anything to blame your odd behavior on. “Uhm, I just think I bruised my cervix, and it just hurts.”

Her eyes instantly widened, and you could see her holding back a grin. “Oh my fucking God, you slut. You had me thinking something actually bad had happened! When did you and Sim even run off to fuck?”

You sighed in relief, glad that she was distracted by the news you had just dropped on her. She didn’t notice the lingering look in your eyes that indicated there was actually something deeper driving you mad.

“Uh, quickie in the bathroom. I don’t know, you were probably too drunk to notice.”

She hummed while nodding. “Yeah, I’m not going to lie, I don’t really remember much after Sunghoon puked everywhere. But fuck, a bruised cervix from a quickie is insane. Oh, Yujin is going to love this.”

“Yeah, it’s a fucking bitch. I feel like I’m sitting on a knife or something,” you said. You weren’t lying about this part—you were sure Heeseung had actually bruised your cervix with how hard he fucked you last night—but you were fine letting her think you had slept with Jake instead.

“Oh, my poor baby. No wonder you’ve been in bed all day. Let’s just get this boxed up and head back to the apartment. Geez, I’m gonna have to have a talk with Jake later.” You flashed her a smile, nodding at her suggestion, glad that this not only got her off your back but also got you out of having to stay another thirty minutes at this restaurant.

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹: 

if anyone asks we fucked last night kk?

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

wtf

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

no questions pls 

JAKEY 🤢🦮: 

fuck that what’d u do 🤨

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

none of your business go back to playing               roblox with riki or something 🙄

JAKEY 🤢🦮: 

THAT WAS ONE TIME

JAKEY 🤢🦮: 

fuck you

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

tell me!!!!! you made it my business when you dragged my dick into whatever it is so i deserve to know 😤

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

i bruised my cervix

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

HUH

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

NO I’M NOT TAKING THE BLAME FOR THAT??

Y/N (evil bitch) 👹:

everyone’s gonna think you have a big dick

JAKEY 🤢🦮:

bet 🙂‍↕️ 

The rest of the weekend passed without Ryujin or anyone else probing into your life, and you couldn’t have been happier. There were so many moments where you debated whether or not you should reach out to Heeseung, but you quickly dismissed the idea. Besides, you had blocked him on everything, and you were sure he had done the same, so there would be no point in trying.

Distracted by thoughts of Heeseung, it had completely slipped from your mind that school was starting back on Monday. Last night (thanks to Ryujin of course), you hurriedly packed your school bag and made sure you had everything for the first day.

And while you usually enjoyed school, just from today, you already felt overwhelmed. It seemed that all your professors had decided to assign work and readings for the next class. You were already swamped with assignments, feeling the weight of the semester ahead.

“Okay, but don’t you think I at least deserve to know who you slept with?” Jake's voice cut through your thoughts as you walked through the library shelves, searching for a book your professor had assigned out of nowhere that wasn’t even mentioned in the syllabus. You had been barely listening to his yapping as most of your focus was on finding the book. 

“Ryujin won’t stop talking my ear off about how I broke you and how you couldn’t move all weekend. She thinks I’m an ass and won’t stop scolding me like I’m the one who did it! I’m a gentleman—I’d never bruise anyone’s cervix without permission,” Jake said with an exasperated tone, trailing behind you.

“I’m pretty sure gentlemen, at least the ones i know don’t beg on their knees for anal-”

He cut you off, his eyes widening. “Alright, alright! That was one time and I was drunk. Jesus, woman! And don’t act like you didn’t let me do it—you were perfectly fine with it. Either way, I still feel like I should know who the fella is.”

“Please don’t say fella, it’s such a turn-off.” You scrunched your face at his choice of vocabulary, shaking your head before turning back to search for your book.

“Okay, fine, whatever. I just want to know who I’m protecting from Ryujin’s annoying ass, and honestly, I think Sunghoon overheard her, so now we can assume the whole school knows.” It was well-known that once any news hit Sunghoon, it spread through the school like wildfire. He had a bit of a loose lip and an affinity for gossip, making him the school’s personal Deuxmoi, but with none of the anonymity (maybe Perez Hilton was a better comparison).

“I’m serious, Jake, you don’t want to know. Just leave it. You owe me anyway.” By now, you were growing increasingly irritated with Jake’s relentless probing and the fact that you still couldn’t find the damn book.

He shot you an incredulous look. “Owe you for what? Now you’re just making up debts that don’t even exist!”

“Anal,” you replied without missing a beat, already smiling, knowing his reaction.

“Oh my God, Y/N, fuck you literally! Geez, if someone had told me this was the price I had to pay for putting it in the ass once, I wouldn’t have even touched it with a ten-foot pole,” Jake exclaimed, and you couldn’t help but giggle. You loved to mess with Jake, especially because he was always so overly dramatic and had the best reactions.

“Seriously, Jake, you don’t want to know. You did your job, so thanks, but please stop bothering me about this.” You flashed him an exaggerated smile and patted him on the head.

Jake’s eyes widened, and he stopped in his tracks. “No fucking way.”

“What?” You didn’t like how he was staring at you.

“Please don’t tell me you slept with Heeseung.” The smile on your face instantly vanished as you froze at his words. How the fuck did he know?

“No fucking way. You just slept with the enemy? Are you kidding me? Do you see this?” He gestured dramatically at his face. “This is the aftermath of my survival from his wrath and proof that I fought valiantly for you. And you go ahead and sleep with him? Oh my God, and you made everyone think I fucked up your vagina when it was actually him? Holy shit, wait until Ryujin hears about this.” You quickly reached over and clamped your hand over his mouth, realizing how absurdly loud he was being in the library.

“Shut the fuck up, you’re practically screaming! And what the fuck are you even talking about? Of course, I would never sleep with Heeseung.” You did your best to mask your surprise, hoping he wouldn’t catch on.

Jake shook his head, scoffing in disbelief. “You’re such a shit liar. The only other time I remember your cervix getting bruised was when Heeseung fucked you on that yacht last Christmas. Remember how you had a hard time sitting straight at Christmas dinner?”

Fuck, he got you there.

You sighed and reluctantly nodded, closing your eyes in frustration. “Okay, fine. But please don’t tell Ryujin, Sunghoon, or anyone else. I already feel like shit about it, and my self-worth is in the gutter right now. I’ve been sick all weekend just thinking about it.”

“He didn’t force you or anything, right?” Jake's face shifted to one of genuine concern, his brows knitting together.

You shook your head. “No, of course not. It’s just that I regret it so much. I felt so gross afterward. It was just a really, really bad drunken mistake, and I don’t want to talk about it. Seriously, thanks for covering for me. You’re literally the best because I really don’t want anyone to find out. I just want to forget about it.”

Jake studied you for a moment, clearly understanding how much this was affecting you. He nodded, reaching out to give you a comforting hug, which you gratefully returned while you let out a sigh. “Yeah, don’t worry. I won’t say anything. Just let me know if he tries anything else or if you need anything.”

The hug was comforting, a small balm for the turmoil of the weekend. You were relieved he didn’t press further or make you feel worse about what happened. However, as you started to pull away, a familiar voice sliced through the air, bringing with it an overwhelming sense of déjà vu. Jake’s groan confirmed the arrival of the last person you wanted to see.

“In the library is kinky, but what can I expect from the two of you? Always so classy,” Karina’s smug tone cut through the air. You and Jake quickly broke from the hug, and you rolled your eyes as you faced her, already irritated by her presence.

“Are you stupid or like blind? Cause obviously if you weren’t then you’d be able to clearly see we were just hugging you fucking dumbass,” Jake snapped back, his tone sharp. Normally, you’d find his sass amusing, but Karina’s presence seemed to have sucked out any potential humor in the air.

“Jesus, Jake, you’re such an ass,” Karina snapped back at him before turning her attention to you. “Get your dog on a leash, would you? Maybe you should have been more careful about who you chose to have a kid with. The anger issues are seriously concerning with this one, not to mention the aggression. Heard about what happened over the weekend.”

“Karina literally shut the fuck up. You know damn well I’m not pregnant. It’s not even funny anymore; you’re just dragging it out. Just fucking mind your own business,” you snapped, your anger bubbling over. You could see Jake’s jaw clenched tight, his irritation matching your own.

“Well actually it kind of is my business 'cause Heeseung has been MIA all weekend, and I can’t help but wonder—since you’re such a slut—if you had something to do with it. The past few months since you two left were perfect, but the second you come back, everything seems to be fucked up. So tell me, what the hell happened at the party?” Karina’s sneer was almost unbearable, and you fought the urge to slap her.

“Maybe he finally realized what a fucking bitch you are.”Jake’s voice was laced with disdain. If Ryujin was Karina’s biggest hater, Jake wouldn’t be far behind her. Even as kids he hated even having to sit at the same table as her so his hostility towards her was all too familiar for you.

Karina ignored him as her glare remained fixed on you. Her pretty face now twisted into a deep frown and you knew she was pissed. It was a stark contrast to the fake friendliness she’d shown you just a week ago at the grocery store.

“I didn’t fucking do anything, and I don’t want anything to do with him, so fuck off. Seriously. Maybe Jake’s right—he finally realized how much of a clingy piece of shit you are,” you shot back, frustration evident in your voice. You should have known that Karina would notice Heeseung missing from her side for a good portion of Friday night.

Karina’s expression hardened as she took a step closer, unyielding. “You’re such a shit liar. What did you do?”

“This is bullshit. Let’s fucking go,” Jake said, grabbing your arm and pulling you away. Neither of you wanted to spend another second there.

“You know he said I did it better than you, right?” Karina’s taunt was intended to provoke, and it did just that. You froze, feeling her words hit hard despite knowing she was just trying to get under your skin.

“C’mon, let’s go. Don’t fucking listen to her,” Jake urged, tugging you along again. As much as you tried to ignore her, her words had a lingering effect, and you hated that they got under your skin.

You didn’t care that this was your last year in college; you were convinced that you needed to transfer anywhere far away from here. There was no way you could endure a whole year of torment from Heeseung and Karina. As if to cement this decision, today seemed determined to be the worst day of your life. The moment you arrived at your apartment, rage surged through you when you saw who was waiting for you in front of your door.

“I’m going to fucking call security,” you instantly snapped, pulling your phone out of your back pocket.

Heeseung’s eyes went wide as his hands reached out in front of him. “Wait, wait, wait! Please, Y/N.”

You stared up at him, his eyes pleading with you to hear him out. Those bambi eyes always got to you, and this time was no different. With a roll of your eyes, you slowly put your phone down. “Okay, but I swear to God, if you try anything—”

“I swear I won’t! I promise, I just really need to talk to you. I’ve tried texting you, but I think you blocked me,” Heeseung said, sheepishly scratching the back of his head.

“Fine,” you muttered before walking past him, opening your apartment door, and stepping inside. You left the door open, signaling that he could come in, but he seemed hesitant, staring at the open door.

“Are you coming in or not?”

He blinked a couple of times, surprised that you were allowing him into your apartment, but he quickly followed you in and closed the door behind him. He hadn’t been inside in so long that it felt almost surreal. Everything looked exactly the same, and he found himself realizing that he had kind of missed being here.

“Wow, nothing’s changed,” Heeseung remarked, his tone revealing his surprise, especially as he noticed the photo of the two of you still on top of the kitchen counter.

You followed his gaze and felt heat rise to your face. You didn’t really know why you hadn’t taken it down. “Uh, yeah, I mean, I also haven’t been here for like three months, so I didn’t really have time to change anything.”

Heeseung nodded, but as his eyes trailed back to you, he found himself staring, forgetting his words. You were as gorgeous as ever, but it seemed that the time away had only made him realize how even more beautiful you were. 

“So, what did you want to talk about?” The air between the two of you was awkward, just like at the party however, seeing him sober during the day gave you a much clearer look at him, and you wanted to fucking die. You hated that effect he had on you. 

“Oh, yeah, sorry, uh, I just wanted to check up on you. Friday was kind of intense, and you ran off before I could say anything, so I was worried. I’m sorry for being so rough with you. I shouldn’t have done that.” Heeseung had been beating himself up over how he had treated you, so much so that he hadn’t talked to anyone all weekend despite his phone blowing up with messages from his friends.

“It’s fine. It was something we both wanted, and if anything, it’s on me. I kissed you first, so I’m sorry for that.”

Heeseung shook his head. “No, don’t be sorry, seriously it’s okay, but uhm, I also just wanted to make sure you knew that I wasn’t lying when I said I wasn’t dating Karina. I swear I’m not.”

Your brows furrowed as you recalled the incident in the library a couple of hours ago. “Well, does Karina know that?”

“What?” 

"She confronted me and Jake at the library, demanding to know what I did for you to ghost her all weekend." Heeseung frowned slightly at Jake’s name, and his frown deepened as he listened to what Karina had done. "From what it looks like, she seems to believe that your relationship is much more than whatever you’re saying it is."

“What the fuck? I swear we’re not together. I—” He stopped himself and sighed, realizing that to make you understand he was telling the truth, he had to tell you everything. “Fuck, I— Uh, shit, we’ve just been kind of hooking up, but I swear that’s all.”

He looked almost embarrassed admitting the nature of his and Karina’s relationship, and you could feel a part of your heart waver at what you heard. For him to admit out loud to you and confirm what you had thought was happening hurt despite you knowing that you didn’t have a right as you two weren’t together anymore.

“Oh, uh, okay.” You nodded as you quickly turned around and opened the fridge. You pretended to look around as if you meant to open the fridge before reaching to get the Brita out for water. You knew that if you faced him, the tear welling up in your eyes would pour down your face.

Heeseung went into a near-panic as he saw your reaction. Having dated you for over two years and known you for your entire life, he could tell you were upset. He noticed your shoulders tensing as you kept your back to him, looking into the fridge.

“Wait, wait, but I swear it’s nothing more than that, and I promise whatever happened between Karina and me is over. I don’t have any feelings for her—I never did. She was just there after you left, and it just happened,” he rushed to explain. But his words only seemed to make you feel worse as he continued to ramble.

“Why are you telling me this? You think this is going to make me want to get back with you?” You shook your head in annoyance, grabbing a glass from a cabinet and filling it with water from the Brita.

“No! I’m not trying to convince you of anything,” he said, now genuinely panicked. This was not how he intended the conversation to go.

“You know what she said?” 

“Huh?”

“Karina, you know what she said?” He slowly shook his head, clearly confused by where you were going with this.

“She said that you told her she did it better than I ever did,” you snapped, your anger evident as you stared him down.

His eyes widened in shock, and he scoffed in disbelief. “What the fuck! I’ve never said anything like that to her or to anyone, and it’s not fucking true.”

“What? So she’s just lying to get under my skin?” You were fuming, frustration etched across your face. “Karina’s a fucking bitch, but even she wouldn’t just make something like that up. You must’ve hinted at something for her to believe it.”

“No, no, no, I swear I haven’t said or done anything remotely like what she’s claiming. She’s a fucking liar,” Heeseung's anger flared as he defended himself, clearly outraged at Karina’s audacity.

“Well, it still doesn’t change the fact that you ran straight to her bed the second I was out of the country—literally one fucking day after we broke up!” You huffed, clearly pissed.

“Ok well don’t fucking act like you didn’t do the exact same with Jake. What the hell, Y/N? It isn’t my fault we broke up! You literally slept with one of my best friends!” Heeseung's frustration boiled over, clearly bewildered that you were still trying to act like you had no role in ending the relationship.

“I’ve told you a million times that I didn’t cheat on you with Jake! What more do I have to say for you to believe me?” You were fed up with defending yourself on this issue.

Heeseung rolled his eyes, “Honestly, aren’t you tired of keeping all this up? Beomgyu’s video and Karina along with everyone else hearing about you two should be enough proof.”

“Oh my fucking God! Jake went into the bathroom with me to help because I was puking my guts out. I drank way too much that night because I was so upset after seeing my fucking boyfriend cuddling with some other bitch all night! You’re genuinely a complete moron if you think Beomgyu and Karina are reliable sources. Beomgyu’s been a fucking asshole to me since freshman year because he’s still bitter that I refused to sleep with him, and Karina has wanted to get with you for as long as I can remember. Seriously, I thought you had at least some common sense in you!” You were yelling so loudly that your throat was already starting to feel raw.

Heeseung shook his head in disbelief. He had no idea Beomgyu had even tried to make a move on you, and now that he thought about it, he realized there had always been tension between the two of you. While he knew about Karina’s crush on him, he hadn’t thought she’d actually go as far as to lie about this. “Okay, well people still heard you two together.”

“Fucking hell, Heeseung, it was a house party with a hundred people. You really think anyone could hear anything over the music? You know what, whatever—believe what you want. There’s no point in trying to convince you otherwise. I’ve been honest with you the whole time, and it’s been you who’s been unwilling to listen. You dumped me without even considering my side, even though you were the one neglecting me during that last month before we broke up, spending all your time with Karina. Honestly, even if you’re telling the truth about not sleeping with her before we broke up, it doesn’t change the fact that you emotionally cheated. The number of dates you forgot or canceled to be with her, and how many times I saw you two together on campus when you said you were just hanging out with the guys. Whatever. It doesn’t matter anymore. We’re not together. Just get out.”

Tears streamed down your face, and you didn’t bother wiping them away. You wanted Heeseung to see the pain he had caused you.

Heeseung was at a loss for words as he saw the pain etched across your face. It broke his heart and he couldn’t help but start to realize that maybe there was a chance you were telling the truth and that he might be to blame for everything. He felt his heart crumble. “Y/N…”

You sniffed and shook your head. “Get out, Heeseung. I never want to see you again.”

It had been a week since Heeseung had gone over to your apartment, and every day since, he had been determined to find a way to make it up to you. He knew what your last words to him were, but there was no way he was going to let you go that easily, especially now that he realized he was most likely the one in the wrong and that Karina was a fucking bitch. He had come to that solid conclusion five days prior when he finally decided it was time to confront her.

“Oh my God, what the fuck? Seriously, where have you been? What happened? You literally just disappeared,” Karina ran over to him once she saw him at the café he told her to meet him at.

Even looking at her face made Heeseung want to vomit. “I heard what you did.”

Karina frowned, not understanding what he was saying as she took a seat across from him. “What do you mean?”

“Y/N told me about what you did at the library.” Heeseung tried his best to keep his tone even, attempting to mask the rage he was feeling toward her.

Karina nervously laughed, trying to brush it off. So, he was with you while he ghosted her. “Oh yeah, I ran into her and Jake trying to get it on at the back of the library. Isn’t that fucking insane, like in public like that?”

Heeseung wasn’t in any mood to entertain her. He was already at a boiling point. “Cut the fucking bullshit. She also told me what you said to her at the grocery store. I don’t know what I did to make you think that we’re dating, but we’re not. I don’t even remotely like you.”

“What?” Karina was taken aback by his words. Sure, Heeseung was never as affectionate and loving towards her as he was with you, but she thought she had made good progress in getting him to fall for her.

“Yeah, so I swear to God if I hear you telling anyone else that we’re dating, I will get a fucking restraining order. You have been nothing more than an easy lay for me to get my mind off Y/N this whole time. I let you hang around me because I felt bad, but that’s over now, especially since I realized you’ve been lying to everyone, including me, about everything.”

Karina’s face paled as she took in his words. She opened her mouth to say something, but he didn’t give her a chance. “Also, you’re delusional if you think you’re even comparable to Y/N, much less better than her. Go learn how to actually suck a dick before going around telling anyone that. Seriously, fuck off, and don’t ever talk to me or my friends again.”

Heeseung took off right after that, leaving Karina sitting alone at the table. It felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest as he stormed out of the cafe. Since then, he’d been planning a way to get you to hear him out. The only thing he could come up with was outsourcing, and in this case, that meant trying to reach you through the people you hung around.

It was a no-brainer that trying to talk to Ryujin and actually getting her to hear him out would be harder than getting you to talk to him again, so that was out of the question, which left him with only one other choice. 

Just standing in front of the apartment was making him pissed, but he knew this was probably his best bet. He let out a big sigh before knocking loudly. He waited a couple of seconds, and after a bit, he wondered if he should knock again, but before he could, the door opened.

“What the fuck?” 

Heeseung was the last person Jake would have expected to be on the other side of the door, and it caught him severely off guard.

Heeseung hadn’t seen Jake since he beat him at your mother’s garden party, and while it seemed that any previous marks left on his face from the fight were gone, Heeseung still felt bad. Okay, well, actually he didn’t feel that bad because he was still beyond pissed at Jake. Heeseung had by now come to the conclusion that you were most likely telling the truth about not cheating on him, but it still didn’t change the fact that Jake had fucked you who knows how many times after the two of you broke up.

Jake had always been a very close friend of his since childhood, and if Heeseung was being honest, in high school there were a good number of times when he couldn’t help but find himself envying his friend. It was kind of always known in your friend group that Heeseung had always had a tiny bit of a crush on you. So, when it became known that Jake had been the one to take your virginity, Heeseung was beyond crushed. In fact, he had avoided Jake for a good week, too envious of the fact that it wasn’t him who had been your first. But he was quickly able to get (mostly) over it as he couldn’t deny that he wasn’t surprised; you and Jake had always been the closest. But now, knowing that Jake had broken bro code made that resentment resurface, and he wasn’t sure if it was going away anytime soon (if ever).

“I need to talk to you,” Heeseung reluctantly said. 

“Fuck no,” Jake responded with a condescending laugh, shaking his head in disbelief.

Heeseung’s jaw tightened as he pleaded, “Jake, please.”

Jake stared him down, scrutinizing every aspect of him, clearly enjoying Heeseung's desperation. “Why? Y/N told me what happened on Monday. You’re a fucking asshole.”

“You don’t think I don’t know that? That’s why I’m here. Just let me in,” Heeseung said, his patience wearing thin.

“What’s in it for me?” Jake crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. Heeseung could tell he was relishing the sight of him getting so desperate.

“You already got to fuck my girlfriend as many times as you wanted. Don’t you think that’s enough?” Heeseung gritted his teeth, his voice tight with anger.

Jake rolled his eyes but opened the door, letting Heeseung in. “You know she’s not your girlfriend anymore, right?”

If Heeseung wasn’t so determined to win you back, he would have had no issue punching Jake in the face again. But he needed Jake’s help, so he held back and tried his best it ignore him.

“I need your help,” Heeseung said, crossing his arms and facing Jake.

Jake barely glanced at him as he headed to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of what Heeseung assumed was a protein shake. He started to shake it, more focused on his drink, acting almost as if Heeseung wasn’t even there. “You’re funny if you think I’m going to help you with anything.”

Heeseung sighed once again, watching Jake’s dismissive attitude. God, Jake was such a dick. “I know I fucked up.”

“Yeah? Took you long enough to realize.” 

“I need help getting her back.” Jake let out a derisive snort that he didn’t even bother to hide.

“Holy shit, you’re delusional. What makes you think I’d help you?” Jake’s laughter was infuriating, and Heeseung started to regret coming here.

“Jake, I know what I did. I know there’s nothing that can fully make up for it, but I need Y/N back. I’m begging you, man, I need your help.” Heeseung’s pride was at rock bottom, but he didn’t care. If this was what he had to let go of to win back the love of his life, so be it.

“You literally cheated on her. Why the fuck would I help someone who cheated on her try to win her back? You don’t deserve her.” Heeseung couldn’t deny it anymore; he had emotionally cheated on you, whether he intended to or not and it sickened him to realize that he was responsible for your pain.

“I know I don’t deserve her, and I also realize what I did and how I’m responsible for everything. I know now that the last month before we broke up was terrible for her, and I was a complete asshole. I didn’t mean to hurt her; everything just spiraled so quickly that I didn’t have time to process it. I swear I’m not trying to make excuses—there aren’t any. But the last three months have been hell for me. You don’t understand how empty I’ve felt, how much it’s all hurt. Hearing that you two came back together from wherever you guys were fucked me up so badly that I ended up taking it out on you, and I’m sorry for that—it was fucked up. But what I’m trying to say is that this whole summer has made me realize just how much I need her. Seeing her again has only made that clearer. I should have listened to her that night, but I was so blinded by anger about you two that I lost control, and you have no idea how much I fucking regret it. Talking to her last week made me see just how badly I fucked up, and I guess I was too caught up in Karina’s lies to accept the truth. I know I don’t deserve her, but please, I just need one last chance to make things right.” Heeseung’s sincerity was evident in every word, and Jake could tell that this was something Heeseung had been tormenting himself over for a while.

“I don’t know what you want me to do,” Jake said honestly. “I don’t even know how I can help. This is between you two.”

He hadn’t expected Heeseung to lay everything out so openly, and he was a bit taken aback. But Jake still struggled to fully support Heeseung. He knew how miserable and broken you had been after the breakup, and he wasn’t sure he could let you go through something like that again.

“I just need her to know that I’m sorry and to hear me out just once more. I know I don’t deserve it, but please. This was all I thought about this entire week, and I don’t know what else to do. I mean I came all the way over here to you of all people because of how desperate I am. I know you don’t owe me anything, especially after everything, but please, I’m begging you. Help me out, man.” Heeseung’s eyes were filled with desperation, and Jake let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.

“Is Karina still in the picture?” 

“Fuck no, and I made sure she understood. She’s literally the worst mistake I ever made, and I should’ve known better. I just didn’t think she’d take it this far, but I swear, there was nothing between us to begin with. She just caught me at a vulnerable time and took advantage of it. I fully acknowledge the mess I made in the month leading up to Y/N and me breaking up, and I know it’s probably too late now, but please, Jake. Y/N is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You of all people should know that, so I can’t just let this go without trying one more time.” 

Heeseung couldn’t even lift his head to face Jake anymore, his eyes focused on his trembling fingers. The shame of his actions weighed heavily on him, and admitting it all out loud took a lot out of him.

A few seconds of silence passed, and Heeseung assumed Jake was deliberating. With each passing second, his anxiety spiked, and he desperately wished Jake would say something, anything.

“Fuck, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but okay,” Jake said, his tone heavy with disbelief. Heeseung’s head snapped up, his eyes wide with shock. “There’s no guarantee this will even work, but I’ll try something. Just know that I’m not taking this lightly. If you mess it up again, I’ll fucking kill you. I’m not kidding. The moment I see Karina anywhere near you, you’re dead. I’m only doing this because I know how much you meant to her and how miserable she’s been without you.”

Heeseung’s smile stretched so wide it made his cheeks hurt, but he didn’t care. “Thank you so much. Seriously, thank you, man. I really owe you.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Jake said, rolling his eyes at how excited Heeseung was. “But if Y/N isn’t having it, there’s literally nothing else I can do. So don’t get your hopes up.”

“No, I get it. Seriously, thank you so much. And I’m genuinely sorry for everything. It was fucked up for me to fight you like that.” Heeseung wasn’t sure if things with their friend group would ever return to normal, but he’d be lying if he denied that he missed having his friends around. A small bit of him kind of hoped this might be a step in the right direction of maybe getting everything back to normal.

“Yeah, whatever. I guess I kind of deserved it for sleeping with your girl,” Jake said with a hint of sarcasm.

Okay, maybe Heeseung wasn’t entirely fine with Jake being around like before as he felt one of his eyes twitch in irritation at the reminder of Jake being in your bed all summer, but he pushed the thought aside. “Just don’t make it a habit.”

“We’ll see. Don’t fuck it up.”

Heeseung felt another twitch in his eye. Maybe he wasn’t entirely over the idea of killing Jake Sim.

You had been sort of in a weird state of limbo where it seemed that a part of you was still wallowing in the sadness that came after the whole fight with Heeseung in your apartment but also there was also a part of you that was just kind of irritated with everything and you weren’t sure how to get yourself free from this state.

And it seemed the latter was taking over your current state as you let out a grunt of frustration as you attempted to hit the ball over the net, only for it to get caught and cause you to lose. Shouts of amusement came from across the court as you sneered in annoyance.

“Ha! Dinner’s on you! Oh, princess you fucking suck at this.” Jake was a little too happy about your loss as he giggled around the court. 

Sweat drenched the both of you as the setting sun’s heat blazed relentlessly down the two of you. “You know that I’m usually good! You’re just better today I guess.” 

You sheepishly shrugged before chugging your water from your water bottle on the side, the cold liquid instantly quenching your thirst. You were so ready to leave and get food.

“You just got unlucky that Sunghoon wasn’t here. There’s no doubt he’d be buying dinner. I’ve never seen someone worse at pickleball than he is.” You both let out a small laugh thinking about your mutual friend and his lack of athleticism. 

"Yeah, honestly, I know he said he was sick or something, but I bet he just said that to dodge paying for dinner," you muttered, tossing your keys at Jake after packing up your paddle and balls. "You're driving, though."

He caught the keys without protest, shrugging as he followed you to the car. After unlocking it, he slid into the driver’s seat, immediately grimacing. “Jesus, what the fuck is this seat positioning?”

“Leave me alone, it’s my car,” you rolled your eyes, watching as he adjusted the seat to his liking.

“Too nice of a car for such a shitty driver like you,” he snorted, making you gasp in offense.

But before you could fire anything back, he quickly switched the subject. "So, who's Ryujin going on a date with tonight?"

"Some new European exchange student, I think his name’s Armand? Not sure, but I’m pretty sure he’s French."

"Where the hell is she finding all these European guys?" Jake shook his head. 

Pickleball was usually a doubles match with you, Jake, Sunghoon, and Ryujin, but Sunghoon had bailed, claiming he was sick (though you weren’t convinced), and Ryujin was off on her date.

"I think he's in her finance class—or at least that’s what Yujin said. But yeah, she clearly has a type," you snorted, sending Ryujin a quick text to see how the date was going.

"That’s an understatement. I’m surprised she got over Louis that fast. And how the hell does Yujin still know everything about everyone despite being abroad for a whole semester?"

The circle you and your family had always been surrounded by was small, a natural outcome of the exclusive lifestyle the upper echelon of society led—one not easily accessible to just anyone. This circle was even tighter at your school, where everyone with status seemed to gravitate. As soon as someone new entered the fold, it took only a few days for word to spread, and soon enough, everyone knew everything about them, especially if they came from a similarly privileged background. So it was no surprise that even after studying abroad in Italy for 6 months, Yujin still managed to stay in the loop.

“You know you don’t actually have to be on campus to keep up with everything,” you sighed, rolling your eyes. 

It was frustrating, sometimes even invasive, to know that every move you made was watched and analyzed, but it seemed to be the price you and your friends paid for the lives you led.

Jake hummed in agreement, and for a few moments, the car was uncharacteristically quiet. It was unusual—Jake was never one to keep his mouth shut, so his silence could only mean one thing.

"Ugh, what?" you groaned, turning your phone off and shifting your focus to his profile.

Jake shot you a brief look of confusion before turning his attention back to the road. "What?"

"Just spit it out." You knew all too well that when Jake went quiet, it meant he was holding back something important—and more often than not, it wasn’t good news.

He gave you another glance, this one doing nothing to ease the knot forming in your stomach, before letting out a long sigh. "So, the other day, someone came to see me."

You raised an eyebrow, sensing that he was trying to drag this out. It couldn’t be good. "Oh my God, just tell me already. Who was it?"

Jake took a few more seconds before finally answering. “Heeseung.”

Your ex’s name was the last thing you expected to hear. “What?”

“Yeah, someone knocked, and when I opened the door, there he was, just standing there.” Jake’s slow pace was driving you insane—you just wanted him to get to the point.

“Just tell me what he wanted. Did he try to fight you again? Because I swear to God—”

“No! No, it wasn’t anything like that. He didn’t come to start anything; he just asked for a favor.” Jake nervously bit his lip, his fingers drumming against the steering wheel. He clearly didn’t want to tell you what Heeseung was really after.

“Jake, just get to the fucking point. What did he ask for?” 

“Okay fine, he wanted me to talk to you about maybe hearing him out again.” Jake grimaced as he revealed Heeseung's request, sensing that the silence on your end was not a good sign. “Ugh, please Y/N, say something.”

You didn’t know if you should be fuming or surprised. Maybe both. “What did you say?”

Your calm tone caught Jake off guard as he turned into the Thai restaurant you’d chosen for dinner, parking before facing you. “Okay, you can’t be mad, but I agreed.”

Your mouth opened in protest, anger filling your eyes, but he rushed on before you could interrupt. “Just listen. You know me—I wouldn’t agree to something like this, especially with him, unless I really thought he deserved it. After I listened to him, I could see how genuine he was. I know he was a dick on Monday, but he came to me desperate and genuinely sorry. He wouldn’t have approached me of all people if he wasn’t serious.I know how much he hurt you, but I also see how unhappy you are without him. This might not be the worst thing for you two. Plus, Karina’s definitely out of the picture—Heeseung looked furious talking about her and promised he wouldn’t associate with her again.”

You processed everything slowly, staring at Jake. “He hurt me so bad,” was all you could manage as you shook your head, struggling to accept what your best friend was telling you.

Jake’s eyes softened at your reaction. “I know, Y/N. He’s still a total asshole, but deep down, you know that not having him around hurts even more. I didn’t promise him anything, and I won’t ever force you to talk to him. Honestly, if I had my way, I’d keep him far away from you. But I know you, and I see how badly all this unresolved feeling is fucking with you. I don’t want that for you. So just know this is an option. It doesn’t have to be now, or next week, or even this month. But if you ever feel ready to talk to him again—especially now that it seems like you both understand what happened—he’s willing to apologize. I’ll even be there with you if you want.”

Jake was right, and you hated that. Deep down, you knew this unresolved pain would eat you alive. Heeseung had always been part of your life, and having him ripped away, even for just a couple of months, was agonizing. You didn’t know if you could just cut him out completely, so you slowly nodded. “Okay.”

Heeseung honestly had little faith that Jake would keep his promises, but he still held onto a sliver of hope. Yet, as the weeks passed with no word from you, that hope began to dwindle. After a month had gone by without any communication, he was on the verge of accepting that he had ruined the most important thing in his life. Just as he was about to let it go, fortune finally smiled on him: he spotted you outside, nervously biting your lip as you waited for his class to end. A grin spread across his face the moment your eyes met, and he walked toward you.

“Hey,” he greeted softly.

His smile made your heart race, and it was annoying to realize that he still had that effect on you after everything that had happened. “Hey, I was wondering if you were busy. I think I’m ready to talk.”

Heeseung mentally noted to give Jake the biggest thank you ever. Despite his doubts about Jake's ability to follow through, he couldn't be more grateful to be proven wrong.

“Yeah, of course. This is my last class of the day,” he said, eagerly nodding as you both walked out of the building.

“Oh great, I wasn’t sure about your schedule, so I was just hoping I got lucky and you were free.” The awkward tension between you was palpable. “Do you want to grab lunch? I can drive if you didn’t.”

“Yeah, that sounds perfect. Jay drove us today, but I’ll just text him that he doesn’t have to worry about me.” Heeseung couldn’t help the smile spreading across his face. It was amazing how much your presence lifted his spirits. You were like a ray of sunshine, and just being able to look at you felt pretty fucking incredible.

You shot him a small smile before nodding, leading him to your car. “Okay, perfect.”

The ride to the restaurant was quiet, with barely any words exchanged until you both placed your orders.

Knowing that silence would make everything feel pointless, you mustered the courage to clear your throat and initiate the conversation. “Jake told me you really wanted to talk to me again.”

Heeseung nodded without hesitation. “Yeah, I’m not going to lie, I really didn’t think he’d actually help, but I’m so glad he did. I hope you didn’t feel forced or anything—that’s the last thing I want. If you ever feel that way during this conversation, I would completely understand if you just walked away.”

You nodded, recognizing the sincerity in his words. It gave you reassurance about his intentions. “I wasn’t forced or anything, but it did take some time. Honestly, I didn’t want to hear you out again, especially since last time ended badly. But I’ve had time to think, and I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to do this, at least for myself, to move forward from everything.”

“I’m really glad you gave me a chance to talk to you again. Y/N, I know this might not mean much to you, but I truly want to say I’m sorry.” Heeseung sighed before continuing, “I’ve had time to reflect on everything, and I’ve realized that what I did was unfair to you and hurt you in ways I never intended. None of this was your fault, and I’m so sorry for putting you through that.”

Hearing those words felt like a wave of relief washed over your aching heart. It was as if you had been yearning to hear him acknowledge your pain, and his sincere apology felt like a crucial step toward healing. Yet, one lingering question held you back.

“Why did you do it?” you asked softly, almost afraid to voice it. You noticed Heeseung’s eyes soften at your words.

He sat in silence, contemplating your question. Why had he abandoned you during the last month of your relationship?

“I’m not sure,” he blinked, his brow furrowing in distress. “I know that’s not a good enough answer, but honestly, I don’t even think I understand it myself. I really don’t want this to sound like an excuse, but I didn’t realize what was happening until it was too late. That project consumed so much of my time, and unfortunately, that meant spending all those hours with Karina. It became a routine, and I thought it would help me finish the class with a good grade. I never stopped to consider if Karina had ulterior motives, and I’m so sorry—I never thought about how this would affect you.”

You were unsure how to process his words, but you appreciated his honesty and let him continue. “I didn’t mean to blow you off or prioritize the project, which ended up meaning prioritizing Karina over you. That was never my intention. I hope you understand that I never saw her as a replacement or thought she was better than you in any way, especially not romantically. I swear nothing happened between us until after you left for your trip. Even then, I was just so angry, and she happened to be there. She was only an outlet for my frustration, and I know that’s probably not what you want to hear, but I can’t deny that something happened. I just need you to know that aside from the physical, there was nothing else with her.”

Heeseung grimaced as he admitted all this. The weight of his actions felt unbearable, and when he saw your face—so sad, struggling to hold it together—it made him feel even worse. He hated that he was the cause of your pain.

You nodded slowly, your chest tightening as you absorbed his words and another sigh left your mouth. “That last month was so unbearable for me. It was literally hell. You have no idea how many nights I spent blaming myself, thinking I drove you to another girl. But what hurt even more was the aftermath. I’ve known you for so long, and I never realized how much you meant to my life until you were just… gone. I felt so lost without you.”

“It was the same for me. Y/N, you’ve been the love of my life since we were kids. You’ve always been my dream and literally everyone around us knows how much you’ve always meant to me. I’ve dated around and hooked up with other people but at the end of the day, I just kept coming back to you. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. You’re my home. That’s why I had to take this chance—to see you again, to beg you to hear me out one last time.” His voice trembled, and a tear slipped down your cheek as you felt the weight of his desperation. Your heart ached, torn between the pain of the past and the flicker of hope in his eyes.

He reached over to take your hand in his, the warmth of his familiar touch sending a jolt through you. A small, hopeful smile broke through his anxiety. “I love you, Y/N. I truly believe you’re it for me. But if you need me to let you go, I’ll do it. I’d do anything to see you happy.”

“Heeseung…” The words barely escaped your lips before tears started streaming down your cheeks. You couldn’t hold back your emotions, even in this crowded place. His confession pierced through the defenses you had built, reaching deep into the empty spaces you didn’t even know existed. You remembered all the pain he had caused, the scars still fresh, and yet, despite everything, he was still your Heeseung. Your heart ached with the undeniable truth that he was your destined other half, and you couldn’t bring yourself to let him go completely.

In that moment, amidst the whirlwind of your emotions, the right path became unmistakably clear. You took a deep breath, feeling the weight of your feelings shift into something resolute. With trembling hands, you squeezed his. This wasn’t just about forgiveness; it was about embracing the possibility of healing together. “I can’t let you go, not now,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. “Let’s find our way back.”

No one had ever warned you how difficult it truly was to rebuild something broken, even with someone you’d known your entire life. But now, standing on the other side of that struggle, as you watched the pieces of your relationship with Heeseung slowly fall back into place, you realized that every effort had been worth it. The awkward silences, the tentative steps, and the raw vulnerability—it had all led to this unexpected peace. Months ago, you would’ve laughed if someone told you not only that you’d be back together, but that you’d be more in love with Heeseung than ever before. Yet, against all odds, here you were—more sure of him, more connected, and somehow, more in love than you ever thought possible.

It had been two weeks since that lunch, two weeks since you both decided to give things another shot. Although hesitation still hung between you, trust was slowly rebuilding, and you could feel the progress with every passing day. The real breakthrough came when you got solid proof that Karina was no longer a looming threat. It seemed that Heeseung’s rejection hit her harder than anyone expected, leading her to pack up and flee to her family’s summer home in Lake Como. Word spread quickly that she was taking a semester off to “heal” from all the so-called negative toxicity, but honestly, you couldn’t care less. And it seemed that it wasn’t just you—everyone in your circle seemed to be rejoicing the second her plane left the tarmac, collectively exhaling as though they’d been holding their breath for months. Her departure felt like the final nail in the coffin of a drama that had dragged on far too long, and for the first time in a while, you felt truly free from the chaos.

You and Heeseung had agreed to take things slow, both afraid to fuck up the fragile foundation of your newly rekindled relationship. While you often found yourself holding back more than you were used to, the fresh start was also exciting, like falling in love all over again. The honeymoon phase was in full swing, and honestly, you were soaking it up. So much so that it seemed your entire friend group—finally restored, thank God (you were sure you’d even seen Jay shed a tear when he was reunited with Sunghoon)—was playfully revolting at how inseparable you and Heeseung had become. But despite the jokes, everyone was genuinely thrilled to see you two back together. Even the soft launch on Instagram stirred enough commotion that your mom called, confused. But you didn’t care about anyone’s reactions, because for the first time in a long time, you were truly happy.

“I’m surprised your little purse dog isn’t with you,” Yujin’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts as she appeared out of nowhere, making you jump.

“What?” You shot her a confused look.

“Heeseung! He’s like your own little purse dog these days. I don’t think I’ve seen you two apart since you got back together,” she teased, giving you a smug grin before snatching your drink from your hand and taking a big swig.

You snatched it right back, rolling your eyes. “That is not true!”

But the grin on your face betrayed you—you knew exactly what she meant.

Your half-hearted attempts to deny her claims were cut short when yet another voice chimed in, startling you once again. "Nah, Yujin's right. You two are capital C clingy."

"Stop sneaking up on me!" you groaned, shaking your head at both Ryujin and Yujin. They, of course, found your irritation hilarious. Before you could protest further, Ryujin also reached over and grabbed your drink, taking a long sip without hesitation.

"Oh my God, just take it!" you exclaimed, shaking your head in disbelief. You turned to grab a fresh cup, already resigned to making yourself another drink.

"But seriously, where is Heeseung?" Ryujin asked, glancing around the packed house, her eyes scanning the crowd for your boyfriend.

Jake had thrown a party to celebrate Karina’s dramatic exit, and it seemed like everyone you knew had shown up. His place was absolutely massive so it was insane to see the entire place bursting with people, not a single corner empty.

You shrugged as you added ice to your drink. "Not sure, I saw Jay dragging him out to the pool. I think they’re playing beer pong. You guys do realize we haven’t been together every second, right?”

Yujin scoffed. "You sure about that?t At least from what I’ve been seeing I’m having a hard time believing that."

“Yeah, babe, I don’t think there’s been a single day this week you haven’t been with him,” Ryujin added. But when she noticed a slight frown tugging at your lips, she quickly backpedaled. “But that’s not a bad thing! You guys are back together, and honestly, you seem so much happier and more in love. We’re happy for you.”

Yujin nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it’s cute. Almost sickeningly so. But seriously, we’re all just glad you two are happy again.”

Right on cue, you felt a familiar arm wrap around your waist from behind. You knew instantly who it was. “Aww, that’s so sweet, Yujin. Glad we have your support,” Heeseung teased, reaching out to fist-bump her.

"Were you out playing beer pong?" you asked, glancing up at Heeseung.

He nodded with a grin. "Yeah, Sunghoon and I absolutely annihilated Jay and Jake. Those two suck every single time, but they keep teaming up like they’ve got something to prove. Not that I’m complaining—it just means we keep winning. The loser had to admit the other’s dog was better, and Sunghoon had Jake practically in tears, saying Gaeul was superior to Layla. It was almost cruel. Layla’s literally upstairs, and he ran right up to apologize to her."

Ryujin snorted. "You guys are such kids. What kind of punishment even is that?"

"Hey, I’ll have you know that when it comes to Gaeul, I’d put my fucking life on the line for her!" Sunghoon appeared out of nowhere, clearly having overheard the mention of his beloved dog.

"Yeah, don’t mess with his dog. It’s, like, actually serious for him," Heeseung added, backing up his friend with a smirk.

You couldn’t help but smile. It felt so good to have everyone back together, the easy banter flowing like it always had. The boys, especially, had clearly missed each other. Things were a bit tense between Heeseung and Jake at first, but once Sunghoon and Jay rejoined the group, it felt like no time had passed at all. Of course, Heeseung wasted no time making it clear that you were off-limits now, even threatening that he’d shave Jake’s hair off if he so much as thought about crossing that line—and judging by Jake’s face, it was a threat he took seriously.

As Sunghoon passionately defended his dog, you felt Heeseung's arm tighten around your waist. He leaned in, his breath hot against your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. “I don’t know about you, but I can think of something way better than listening to Sunghoon go on about his dog’s honor,” he whispered, his voice laced with mischief. “How about we check out one of the way-too-many bedrooms upstairs?”

The suggestion came with that familiar cheeky tone, and you didn’t need any convincing. Without a word, the two of you quietly slipped away from the group, who were still caught up in their conversation about pets. Heeseung was right—there were far too many rooms in this house, but luckily you knew exactly where to find a quiet, empty one.

Your body hadn’t even fully crossed the threshold before Heeseung captured your lips with a fervor you hadn’t felt since Hyunjin’s party. When you said that you and Heeseung were committed to taking your relationship slowly, you truly meant it. Sure, the two of you had made it to third base, but you had intentionally held back from rushing into sex, wanting to protect the delicate balance of your relationship. Yet, in that moment, it was clear that neither of you was opposed to going all the way. You both had been holding back for far too long.

Shutting the door behind you, he slammed you flat against the it as his tongue explored inside your mouth. You were panting against his lips as you reached for his clothes. It was obvious neither of you were particularly interested in taking it slow. 

“God you’re so fucking hot,” Heeseung didn't hold back his groan as his hand pulled your top over your breasts and cupped one in his hand, groping it as he deepened the kiss. You scratched a hand against the nape of his neck eliciting another low groan from him while his lips trailed down from your lips down to your neck. His touches had never felt better and you were yearning to feel him closer and deeper. 

While his lips worked their way down, you didn’t waste any time pulling your leather pants down, revealing the same pair of black thongs that you had been wearing the last time the two of you had sex and Heeseung groaned against your skin once he realized. 

“Fuck, you’re going to be the death of me.” You giggled at his response and quickly tugged him towards the bed, leaving behind a trail of clothes as the two of you continued to get rid of your clothes until you were left bare. 

Your hands firmly gripped his shoulders once he had finally stripped and you pushed him down on the bed as you also went down on your knees. His mouth was slightly agape as his eyes twinkled at the realization of what was happening.

“I’ve missed your cock so bad,” you purred before letting a wad of spit fall from your mouth and straight on his rock-hard dick. 

His eyes instantly rolled back when your hands wrapped themselves around his length and worked their way up and down, adopting a steady tempo. Your eyes never left his face as you held a determined look in your eyes, eager to please him.

“Fuck, just like that,” Heeseung barely managed to pant out as his eyes connected with yours.

You couldn’t hold back a smile. Knowing that your touches had him falling apart like this in pleasure had you growing overcome with lust. There was not a better sight than the one in front of you and you couldn’t break away from witnessing his every reaction even as you slowly started to lick his tip. 

He was panting hard as he watched you lick up and down his shaft before swirling your tongue around his sensitive tip that was dripping with precum. And when you sunk down, allowing his dick to find its place in your warm tight throat, his hands went straight to the back of your head, pushing you further down and inciting you to choke on his length.

It’d been a while since you’d deep-throated anything and you felt the tears instantly prick at your eyes as you gagged around his thick cock. You concentrated hard, closing your eyes to ease your throat as you slowly started to bob your head.

Saliva escaped down the corners of your mouth as the tears were now fully escaping your eyes. The filthy sounds of you gagging filled the room along with Heeseung’s deep grunts. His hands were fully pushing your head down as he thrust up, yearning for you to take him deeper. You tried your best to swallow around his as you searched for air, but he was relentless and pushed you until you couldn’t take anymore and had to slap the sides of his thighs for respite. 

 “Jesus Christ, Heeseung!” You gasped for air before coughing when he finally let you go, realizing how brutal he had been treating your throat.

“Shit, sorry,” his eyes were wide as he reached for your face, pushing your sweat-drenched hair away from your face. “It’s been so long and you felt so good, I’m so sorry-”

“Shut up,” you shook your head as you pushed him back on the bed. You ignored his apologies and quickly got on top of him, ignoring the fact that you had just been brutally choking on your boyfriend’s dick.

You were already dripping wet and Heeseung’s eyes couldn’t take his eyes away from your glistening pussy hovering over his dick. His hands guided themselves to your hips and you slowly teased him as you rubbed the tip of his dick at your entrance. 

“Please,” he pleaded desperately and that was all you needed to hear before you slowly sunk yourself down his length.

The two of you let out groans and you couldn’t help but heavily pant as you went lower, feeling him deeper in you. You felt so full that it felt like you could feel him all the way up your throat. Heeseung was massive and despite having loads of experience riding him, every time it felt like almost too much for you as your body felt like it was being stretched beyond its limit.

“Fuck, you’re too big,” you whimpered as you felt your body slumping over his, trying your best to get adjusted to his side. 

His mouth found yours as he passionately kissed you while his hands found your breasts, rolling your nipples between his fingers. “You’re taking me so well princess.”

As he praised you, you found yourself slowly attempting to move your hips and before you knew it, you were moaning against his lips as you moved up and down his length. The pleasure was overwhelming and you couldn’t stop. The stretch still stung, but the pleasure that came with it was more than anything you could’ve asked for.

“Heeseung,” you moaned out loudly as his hips thrust up to meet yours, forcing you to feel him deeper.

The room was filled with your wanton moans that didn’t stop chanting his name and the sounds of his balls slapping roughly against your pussy. His grunts were getting animalistic and before you knew it, he had flipped the two of you over changing the position and taking over. 

‘Oh my God!” You screeched as he moved your legs to hang over his shoulders, causing the new position to allow him to reach you deeper if that was even possible.

He relentlessly pounded against your sweet spot, “You feel so fucking good. Perfect pussy made just for me.”

His dirty talk had you whimpering and you found yourself reaching down for your clit quickly rubbing it, helping you reach your orgasm faster. 

“I’m almost there don’t stop,” you instructed, and with a couple more hard thrusts, you found yourself loudly crying out as you found yourself reaching your peak. 

You clung to him tightly as you rode out your orgasm and could feel him twitch inside you before also cumming closely after. He filled you to the brim with his cum as you limply laid there taking everything he gave you. Once he was finished, he slowly pulled out inciting a small whimper from you and you could feel all his cum slowly pouring out of you and down your leg. 

Heeseung, seemingly just as worn out as you were, plopped right next to you before pulling you close to him, cuddling you. A huge smile formed on your face as you turned your head to face him and kiss him, someone pounded on the door.

“You two are so fucked for that! You do realize Layla’s room is right next door!” 

Bonus:

It was unbelievable how fast time had flown, especially now, standing with all your closest friends in matching caps and gowns. You couldn’t help but marvel at the fact that you’d all made it through college in one piece, still tight-knit as ever. It was almost enough to bring you to tears—if you weren’t so distracted by how uncomfortable your dress had become under your gown. You kept fidgeting, trying to adjust it for a bit of relief.

“Stop wrinkling your dress!” your mother scolded, while busy straightening Jake’s tie.

“But no one’s even going to see the tie under the gown,” Jake whined, only for your mom to shoot him a stern look that silenced him immediately as she returned to perfecting his outfit.

True to her word, your mom had finally gotten Jake head to toe in one of her custom pieces (minus the cap and gown). “I don’t care if anyone sees it or not. You are not wearing one of my designs without it being flawless,” she insisted, focused on making sure everything was perfect.

You could hear the quiet snickers behind you, and without even turning around, you knew Sunghoon and Ryujin were loving every second of this. They had already survived your mother’s meticulous once-over and were now relishing in watching the rest of you squirm under her scrutiny.

"Yeah, come on Jake, stop being so fussy. You should be grateful she's even doing this for you," Heeseung chimed in, grinning. His playful jab at Jake was laced with just enough sweetness to win over your mom—or at least, that was the plan.

Your mom still hadn’t entirely forgiven Heeseung for the disaster he caused at her garden party, and her approval of your rekindled relationship was, at best, tentative. But it was clear she was slowly warming up, especially with the way Heeseung never missed a chance to flatter her.

“Alright, now you look presentable. Don’t you dare mess with it during the ceremony,” your mom finally declared, stepping back to give Jake a final once-over. She then turned her sharp gaze on the rest of you, making sure everyone else met her high standards.

You exchanged a glance with Sunghoon and Ryujin, who were both barely holding in their laughter. They clearly found your mom’s unofficial role as wardrobe enforcer far more amusing from the sidelines.

“Oh, you all look so beautiful,” your mother said, her smile softening in a way you weren’t used to. The warmth in her gaze caught you off guard, and suddenly, the stuffiness of your dress was the last thing on your mind. As your eyes met hers, the reality of the moment hit you—graduation day, surrounded by your closest friends, all of you about to step into the next chapter of your lives. You could feel the emotions welling up, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes as you took in the sight of everyone in their caps and gowns.

Heeseung, as if sensing your shift in mood, gently tugged your hand into his, threading your fingers together. He squeezed your hand and gave you a reassuring smile, grounding you just when you needed it most.

“Come on, let’s take a picture before we leave,” you suggested, grabbing Heeseung's hand and motioning to your friends.

Your group huddled close, arms draped over each other, laughter bubbling up as your mom snapped away on her phone. Heeseung’s arm stayed firmly around your waist, keeping you close while you smiled for the camera. The joy of the moment, the closeness of your friends, felt like the perfect snapshot of how far you had all come.

As soon as the last picture was taken, everyone started to drift toward the stadium for the commencement ceremony. You watched as the crowd began to gather under the soft glow of the setting sun. After a quick hug and goodbye to your mom, you turned to follow your friends toward the entrance gates.

Just before you could step through the gates, Heeseung gently pulled you aside, his fingers brushing your arm. He leaned in close, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, “I couldn’t have done any of this without you. I’m proud of us.”

His words made your heart swell, emotions bubbling up in a way that almost took your breath away. You looked up at him, your smile soft and full of everything you’d been through together. “I am too,” you whispered back, a mixture of relief and joy filling your chest. “We made it.”

The air was cool, a gentle breeze lifting the corners of your graduation gown as you looked at Heeseung, remembering how uncertain things had once seemed. But now? Everything felt like it was finally falling into place. The obstacles and heartbreak had only made you both stronger.

As the sun began to set, Heeseung took your hand again, just like in the room earlier. This time, though, he brought it to his lips, brushing a light kiss across your knuckles before pulling you closer.

“I love you,” he said quietly, and it wasn’t a grand declaration—just a simple truth that felt completely genuine.

“I love you too,” you answered, your heart full.

Standing there, wrapped in each other’s arms, the future didn’t seem so intimidating anymore. It was uncertain, sure, but with Heeseung beside you, you felt ready for whatever was next.

TAGLIST: @notevenheretbh1 @leov3rse @slut4hee @llvrhee @simjungwon @lhspeachie @sakanelli-afc @rayofsunshineeee @deobitifull @iwaplant @mheretoreadff @farashawhee @skzenhalove @venfl-ifw @jaehoonii @melonvrs @enhastolemyheart @rainyjy @cha0thicpisces @love-be0m @niniissus

[rispwr]

“3 words, 8 letters. I mean it” - J.JK - Mini (M)

Pairings : j.jk x fem! Reader

Genre : situationship, smut, slight fluff.

Contents : chuckblair inspired, limo sx, gossip girl parties setting, unprotected sex (yk what to do babes), riding, praisekink, comparing, big c!jk, slight public sex, not proofread, lemme know what i missed!

Notes : don’t expect too much yall. I’m trying a new writing style. The one that’s not too detailed that i write about everything but the character😭 tell me what you think about this? Should i make more smut? Idk i think i’m bad at smut, i’m more better at fluff and romantic stuff but i just wanted to try this. Xoxo gossip girl💋💋 Ive been watching the show and i love itt!! I love chuck and blair and i think i will def write more inspired by them. I loved the “3 words, 8 letters” line. It’s my favourite tbh.

“I knew you had a type…” his voice trails behind me. I didn’t bother to move or to face him but to just stay still and silent, silently enjoying his touch, the way his touch felt like warmth to my cold like skin, the way the world stops, and everythingstops once he touches me.

“I missed you.”

After Jungkook suddenly left me in Paris without saying a word during our vacation together, I was shattered. One minute, everything felt perfect. the Eiffel Tower lighting up the night sky, his laughter filling my heart with happiness as we explored and the next, the right side of my bed was gone . Broken, sad, left, and helpless. I spent the four remaining days locked away in the hotel room we had booked together.

At the airport, sitting alone in business class, I tried to distract myself, to feel anything other than the suffocating pain that clung to me. That’s when a man approached me. At first, I didn’t want to look at him, but when I did, I felt a sharp ache in my chest. His sleeve tattoos, the undercut, the piercings. it all felt too familiar, too much like him.

When I learned he lived in the same city as me, I impulsively invited him to my upcoming party. I told myself it was a distraction, a way to move on. Maybe even a chance to prove to myself that I didn’t need Jungkook anymore.

I thought that was the end of us. I truly did.

Until now.

“You left me… alone in a country whose people I don’t even know,” my eyes keep shut, trying hard not to let a tear out.

“I’m sorry, honey… let me make it up to you?”

“I have Ian now, Jungkook,” I try to keep my tone straight.

“No, you won’t,” he chuckles deeply. “You’re only with him to replace the missing presence that you can’t live without.” His hands trail around my jawline. “And that is me”

“Three words, eight letters. I mean it,” his tone changes into a soft one, one that I only hear when he wakes up to me wrapped up in his arms, one when he starts talking about our future together, together.

“Three words, eight letters. Let’s get out of here,” I say, grabbing his hand, intertwining with mine, his smile widening.

—-

The limo driver’s voice, distant and polite, asked, “Your place, Ms.?”

“Mhm,” I hummed, breathless already, my response barely audible as Jungkook’s lips crashed into mine. The kiss was firm yet full of emotion, like he’d been starving for days…… He starved for my taste

My breath hitched as Jungkook pulled me into his lap, his large hands gripping my waist. all I could manage was a soft hum, barely audible, as I reached blindly for the button to raise the divider.

The divider hummed as it rises, It being the only thing keeping the driver from seeing us do the deed in the back of the limo, leaving only us in the together in the backseat. His tongue parted my lips, the kiss deepening as his hands roamed over my thighs, hiking my dress higher until it was bunched around my hips.

“Fuck, baby,” he groaned against my lips, his voice low and strained. “I fucking missed you, my pretty girl”

I gasped as he tugged my panties aside, his fingers grazing the slick heat of my core. “You’re already so wet for me,” he murmured, his dark eyes locking onto mine as his fingers teased me, gathering the wetness and spreading it over my entrance. “You’ve been missing me too huh?”

“Jungkook,” I whimpered, unable to answer him as my hips bucked against his hand.

“That’s what I thought,” he said, his lips curving into a small, cocky smirk. His hands gripped my hips as he leaned back slightly, guiding me to straddle him completely. “Come here, baby. Let me feel you.”

I reached between us, freeing him from his pants. He was already hard, his cock thick and pulsing in my hand, and the deep groan that rumbled in his chest as I stroked him sent a wave of heat coursing through me.

“Don’t tease me,” he said, his voice low and dangerous, his hands tightening on my thighs. “You know I can’t wait.”

I positioned myself over him, the head of his cock pressing against my entrance, and slowly sank down, taking him inch by inch. The stretch was overwhelming, my body trembling as he filled me completely.

“Fuck,” he groaned, his head falling back against the seat as his hands gripped my waist. “You’re so fucking tight, baby. You feel so good.”

I braced my hands on his shoulders, rocking my hips slightly to adjust to the fullness. “Jungkook,” I gasped, my voice shaking. “You’re so deep.”

“That’s it,” he murmured, his hands moving to guide me as I began to move. “Good girl. Take me just like that. You’re doing so good.”

The praise sent a shiver down my spine, and I picked up the pace, bouncing on his lap, riding him with a desperation that matched his own. The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the small space, mingling with our moans and the occasional broken gasp of my name from his lips.

“Fuck, baby,” he groaned, his voice strained as his hands gripped my hips tightly, helping me move faster. “You’re gonna make me lose it. You’re so fucking perfect. So good to me.”

“Jungkook,” I whimpered, my nails digging into his shoulders as the pressure built low in my belly. “I-I’m close.”

“Me too,” he growled, his hips thrusting up to meet mine as his pace turned erratic. His dark eyes locked on mine, his voice soft but commanding. “Milk me, baby. Let me feel you. I’ll fill you up, yeah?”

“Yes,” I cried out, my voice desperate. “Fill me up, Jungkook. Please. I want it. I want all of you.”

“Fuck,” he groaned, his grip on me tightening as he slammed into me one last time, holding me down as his release hit. “That’s it, baby. Milk me. Fuck, you’re so good.”

The sensation of him filling me sent me over the edge, my body clenching around him as my orgasm crashed over me in waves. I cried out his name, my movements faltering as he held me close, his lips pressing against my neck as we both trembled through the aftershocks.

For a long moment, neither of us moved, our breaths mingling as we clung to each other. His hands stroked my back, his lips brushing softly against my shoulder as he whispered, “three words, eight letters. I mean it.”

“Three words, eight letters. I mean it more.” I murmured, my fingers tangling in his hair as I kissed him, my heart racing as the limo drove us to my house.

[solarbird]

“Are we willing to fight for it?” Crowd: “YES!” “And when we fight?” Crowd: “WE WIN!” — Kamala Harris to campaign staff, 22 July 2024

That’s right, the “if we fight we win” isn’t from me this time. It’s from Kamala Harris, and I am kind of in shock.

One of the things I most feared about the “replace Biden” movement was the donor class yanking the party right again and hand-picking an all old white dudes ticket and absolutely tanking every chance we had of winning this election and stopping Trumpism for good.

Politically active Black people I know personally were expecting that to happen, because that kind of shit has happened so many times. And when political Black people talk about this shit in the Democratic party, you better listen, because their history on this stuff is solid.

I mean, that’s not the only reason I feared it, I have plenty of my own experience watching this same shit go down. But it’s a big one.

That – and all the many money and organisational problems I have described which would result – was about the biggest problem I had with replacing Biden. Particularly once it was clear the money people were moving on it so hard. I was so sure they’d do again what they’ve always done, slide the top of the ticket back to the “right,” repudiating so much economic and climate good the Biden administration has done, trying to haul us back to Clintinesque neoliberalism which would fail more spectacularly than ever before.

That’s also why I was an instant loud and dare I say it strident pivot to Harris when Biden actually did drop out – it was all to stop that money move from happening. That’s why I was out Sunday as loud and long as I could be, shouting, “WHITE PEOPLE, GET HER THE NOMINATION. FUCKING DO IT” while various usual clowns and dilettantes wibbled on demanding an ‘open convention’ and nattering about a ‘flash primary’ and going off about ‘not voting for a cop’ and the wretched spectre of Joe Manchin dipped a skeletal toe into the race.

None of that was an option. It’s still not an option. It had to be her; it has to be her.

And that speech I’m quoting shows why.

I’m still stunned. I never expected to hear a presidential candidate echoing my own words back at me.

I mean, Biden understands exactly what we’re dealing with – fash propaganda aside, he really is still all there, and his words show it. But he’s not able to frame it that way, it’s just not who he is. To see a candidate frame it like this… exactly like this… that’s something new. And I did not expect it.

I am so rarely truly surprised in politics. It has been a while since I have been surprised at all.

This has surprised me.

Another political writer I follow described her as the first Generation X candidate, and maybe that’s why. Technically she’s like two months too early for GenX, she’s in that transition zone, but y’know what? If she wants to grab that label I am fine with that, because those are some words from someone who fucking gets it. From someone who has figured it the fuck out.

Go watch her speech, particularly, oh… the “I know Donald Trump’s type” section starts around 19 minutes in, but the part after that, that’s where it really starts to matter, at 21:45. Here, I timestamped for you, hopefully it’ll work where you’re reading this and if not, just skip ahead:

I’ve been saying – this is the turning point year. The peak year of a fascist movement weakened but not destroyed by self-inflicted wounds of COVID, the last year of the backstop, the year after which we can start to win.

But still I expected that this year that we’d still have to fight under the old rules, playing the old games of the Baby Boom, even if I knew that one final year of holding would shatter it all, and let us make and play by new rules in ’26 and ’28.

Hence, one more year of the bulwark, one more year of the hold.

Until two days ago, on Sunday, July 21st, 2024, that was exactly how it was playing out.

Then a political miracle happened. Biden left the race and the donor class didn’t get their push to the right, and some of them apparently didn’t even want it because they dropped money again the moment Harris announced her campaign.

I guess maybe those rich bastards finally learned a thing or two about not throwing elections.

And that means…

…maybe we don’t have to wait ’til ’26 and ’28.

Maybe it’s not one last hold after all, before the spring.

Maybe the rules can change now.

Maybe Millennials and Zoomers are going to seize the moment this year.

If they do – if you do, if you go in, if you mean it, if you don’t waver and trip yourself up in details and personality and propaganda and purity tests and and and all of it…

…then…

…this year won’t just be a hold.

This year will be the fucking landslide we have needed for eight years now to wipe Trumpism and its like off the map for a century.

Wanna make that happen?

France and England have shown us the way, and christ, I want to make that happen.

How about you? You up for it? You ready to do the work?

Let’s go, then. Everybody.

All in.

104 days remain.

[storywriter007]

Hi I recently found your page and fell in love with your stories!! I was just wondering if I could request a Percy x reader (maybe Hera’s forbidden child if that's ok) they got together after Percy and Anabeth broke up. And they fight because of Anabeth and how Percy and her are still really close even after the breakup. And reader feels like a second choice and a replacement that can’t compare to the original. something like that but I was hoping that we could get jealous and regretful Percy to

I Needed You - Percy Jackson x Fem!Reader

author's note: ooooh ofc i hope you like this!!

warnings: cursing, toxic relationships

genre: angst

word count: 1k

-> heroes of olympus masterlist

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requests are closed

✧.⭒✧.⭒✧.⭒✧.⭒✧.⭒✧.⭒✧.⭒✧.⭒✧.⭒

"you're a disgrace to my name and everything i stand for!"

for years, y/n had tried so hard to gain her mother's approval. she had done everything: she studied until dawn, trained like no tomorrow, sacrificed her life and sanity, and defended this wicked woman to her peers.

but it wasn't enough. it was never enough. because to hera, y/n was only her forbidden child. the mistake, the accident, the thing that was never supposed to happen.

"you are the worst thing that's ever happened to me! i didn't want you, i didn't want you to be here!" the angry goddess boomed.

"yeah? well, i didn't want to be here either!" y/n yelled back, tears welling up in her eyes.

"everyday, i ask the fates why the hell did luke castellan die when it should've been you! it should've been you who didn't make it out! it should've been you!" she screamed

y/n went quiet; she could feel the eyes on her. she could see zeus next to hera, looking down at the marble floors with sincerity.

she knew it was low when zeus empathized with her.

"i ask them the same thing mom." y/n said softly, a tear spilling out of her eye.

she took a few steps backward, before turning around to walk away.

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the cruel words of her mother replayed in her head as she made her way to percy's apartment. she was minutes away from a breakdown as she knocked on his door.

no answer.

she knocked again, this time, percy quietly opened the door. his eyes were flooded with sympathy, but it wasn't for y/n. she looked past his shoulder to see annabeth on his couch, her face in her hands.

"sorry y/n, can you come back later?" he whispered. "annie's going through something right now."

"yeah, sure." y/n said calmly, feeling her heart shatter.

what could be so important?

"is she okay?" y/n asked.

"yeah, she's fine." percy continued. "she just got a bad grade on her test, and she's really upset about it. y'know how much this stuff means to her."

"aw, i understand." she lied.

no she didn't. a test grade? seriously? y/n had just had the fallout of the lifetime with her mother, and she had told percy about having to talk to her mother beforehand. but of course, when it came to annabeth, he had to drop everything.

"thanks." he smiled before shutting the door quickly.

y/n walked back to her own apartment, fingers pressed against her mouth to block the violent sobs. as soon as she got home, she collapsed on the floor and cried.

she wondered the same thing she had wondered her whole life: why wasn't she good enough?

was this a curse her mother had placed on her? the overwhelming feeling of inferiority that would follow her everywhere. she hated herself, she hated everything about herself, and everybody returned the sentiment. from her mother to her boyfriend, she was just unlovable.

and the one time she needed percy, he wasn't there for her.

hours passed by as y/n wept, and once it struck midnight, she had run out of tears. she steadily got up and drank a sip of water before sitting on her couch. she brought her knees to her chest as she looked out to the city.

suddenly, there was a knock on the door. she didn't have energy to talk to anyone right now.

the knock persisted and she opened the door to see sea green eyes staring at her. she defeatedly opened the door and let him in.

"sorry it took me so long, annie was really upset-"

"shut up, percy. just shut up!" she snapped.

he paused.

"what? are you okay?"

"no! i'm not okay! i told you that i had to go talk to hera today!"

"oh shit, y/n, i'm sorry, i completely forgot!"

his face changed as the realization hit his face.

"i don't give a fuck! you dropped everything as soon as annabeth showed up, didn't you?" she asked, angrily. "i-i mean i get it, okay? you forgot, that's fine. but i came to your door, barely keeping it together, you could see the tears in my eyes and hear my shaky voice, but you just shut the door and acted like i didn't exist until now!"

"i'm sorry, i'm so sorry." he apologized, coming closer to her.

"i don't care that you're sorry! i'm sick of you always prioritizing annabeth over me!"

"i'm sorry, i got caught up-"

"i don't care! stop telling me you're sorry if you're not going to change!"

"y/n, please. i'm sorry i wasn't here before, but i'm here now." he pleaded.

"you should've been here before!" she said. "you should've been here when i needed you to be!" her voice cracked.

"don't cry, please, please don't cry."

"but instead, you were with annabeth. comforting her, choosing her, like you always do!"

"i'm sorry, she was hur-"

"she was hurt? i was hurt when my own fucking mother told me she wished i was dead!"

"oh my gods, y/n, i'm sorry. i'm so sorry."

"stop saying sorry like you care!" she said, tears streaming down her face. "our entire relationship, you've just treated me like the next best thing. the girl you took because annabeth didn't want you anymore. i'm your second choice."

"y/n." he said softly, walking over to her.

"go home percy. i'm sure there's someone who needs you more than i do right now."

"y/n, i'm sorry." he pleaded.

"no, i've had one of the worst days of my life, and i needed you. and you chose to be with someone else." she said through tears. "so now, you're going to chose to be without me."

"y/n."

she didn't say anything. he quietly began making his way to the door, but she didn't spare him a look. she looked outside the window, at the city lights. in the reflection, she could see him. she could see the regret and pain in his eyes. he opened his mouth to say something, but he stopped. his eyes filled with water as he quietly shut the door and left.

[littlefireball]

ʜᴊ|ꜱᴀᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ (ᴍ)

ᴘɪʀᴀᴛᴇ ᴄᴀᴘᴛᴀɪɴ ʜᴏɴɢᴊᴏᴏɴɢ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

ꜰᴋ ᴀᴡᴀʏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀɪɴ ꜱᴇʀɪᴇꜱ

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: ꜱᴍᴜᴛ|ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴᴇᴅ ᴏꜰ ᴋɪᴅɴᴀᴘᴘɪɴɢ, ʀᴏʙʙᴇʀʏ|ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛᴇᴅ ꜱᴇx|ᴘᴇʀɪᴏᴅ ꜱᴇx|ꜱʟɪɢʜᴛ ʙʀᴇᴀꜱᴛ ᴘʟᴀʏ|ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ|ʙᴇɪɴɢ ᴄᴀᴜɢʜᴛ(?)|ᴄᴏɴꜰᴇꜱꜱɪᴏɴ

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 3.9ᴋ

Summary: The tranquil existence was shattered today by the merciless pirates. You surrendered to the overwhelming tide of despair, letting it engulf you. Yet, in that moment of darkness, a figure emerged to rescue you. But is this hero a beacon of hope or a harbinger of doom?

The golden rays of the morning sun filter through the window, warming your face as you rise. Just like every other day, you gather your belongings and step outside, exchanging friendly greetings with the neighbors before unlocking the door to the café right on schedule.

All is as it should be.

"Good morning, Y/N!" called out a familiar voice. It was a middle-aged man, a loyal customer who always ordered the same sandwich without fail.

"Morning!" you replied, already moving with practiced ease to prepare his breakfast.

"How're you doing?" 

"Fine I guess." 

"It's good to hear." He sighed. "Did you hear the news? Pirates have been causing quite a stir lately.

"Yeah… all we can do is hope they steer clear of our town."

"Let's hope so." He smirked helplessly. "Maybe I should just pack up and find a new place."

"Pack up? Where?"

"I'm not sure, just anywhere that feels safe." He shrugged. "What about you? Aren't you thinking of moving?"

"I wish I could. But, you know… my funds are pretty tight."

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine. Here's your sandwich."

"Thanks." He settled the bill and walked out, leaving you alone in the café.

Just as you turned around to tidy up the table, a loud shock caught you off guard. 

"Run!!" The once tranquil town erupted into chaos, and you peered out the window, heart racing with dread. Tons of men wielding a machete swung their weapons menacingly, demanding that the terrified residents surrender their belongings. The air was filled with desperate cries and frantic screams as people scattered in every direction. 

Without a moment's hesitation, you dashed to the door, but just as you reached for the lock, a group of men burst in, kicking the door wide open. You stumbled to the floor, mortified, and before you could regain your footing to fight back, one of the men seized you roughly.

"Let go of me, you scoundrel!" you shouted, thrashing against his grip, but the pirate's hand clamped down on your wrist like a vice.  

"Shut your mouth, you wench!" he barked. The ship rocked violently beneath you as you were dragged onto the deck, your struggles futile against the chains that bound you. The laughter of the pirates echoed around you as they shoved you aside. Helpless, you watched in horror as the small shop you had poured your heart into was ransacked, the townsfolk fleeing in terror, and the once vibrant community fell into an eerie stillness.

"Hey, see this baby girl~how cute you are!" " "Leave me alone, you filthy scum!" Your voice quivered with a mix of fear and defiance as you glared at the pirate who had captured you. 

One of them, should be the captain, a cruel smirk playing on his lips, approached you with a lecherous gleam in his eyes. "A feisty one, aren't you? We'll see how long that lasts," he sneered, his breath reeking of rum and malice. "Set sail!"  

As the boat glides farther into the distance, the town gradually fades from view. The lively chatter of vendors hawking their wares in the bustling market is replaced by the lingering echoes of laughter that grate on your nerves.The salty sea air stung your eyes as you struggled against the chains that bound you to the wooden post. 

Tsk…

The crashing waves echoed around you, a constant reminder of your precarious situation. 

Frantic escape ideas raced through your mind. Yet, you were a land dweller, and diving into the ocean means dying. What options do you have? Can you really call out for someone to rescue you? Here you are, in the heart of the sea—who could—

"Turn left!!!!!It's ATEEZ's ship!!" A loud cry jolted you from your thoughts. Just as you were about to grasp the situation, everything unfolded before your eyes. A deafening roar erupted from the left side of the ship, causing it to lurch violently and sending terror through the crew. The sturdy vessel splintered, hurling pirates overboard, and you tumbled into the frigid sea.

The icy water enveloped you, and you fought to break the surface, but the ocean constricted your breath and drained your strength. As despair set in, you surrendered to the darkness. Just then, strong arms seized you, pulling you upward. Your vision blurred, obscuring your savior's identity, and consciousness slipped away.

—---

Coughing violently, you expelled the salty seawater that had filled your mouth. Your breaths came in rapid gasps, a primal instinct driving you to inhale as if the very air might slip away. As clarity returned, you realized that you were still aboard the vessel... but the faces of the crew surrounding you seemed unfamiliar.

"Are you awake?" A gentle voice broke through the haze, and you turned to see a man clad in a flowing white robe, his expression warm and reassuring.  

"Where... am I?" you managed to whisper, your voice barely above a breath.  

"A ship, obviously," Yunho replied. "You fell into the sea and Jongho saved you." 

The vivid image of the recent attack flickered on the screen, and a wave of dread washed over you as you gazed at the man standing before you. ATEEZ, you recalled, infamous for their ruthless piracy. What would they do? Would they end your life? But then again, why would they bother to rescue you?

"It's perfectly normal to feel a bit disoriented right now. It's a common reaction after being submerged in water..." The man's voice, surprisingly calm, began to ease the tension in your chest. Perhaps they weren't as terrifying as the tales suggested? Still, you knew better than to let your guard down.

"Is she alright?" At that moment, Hongjoong gently knocked and opened the door. His striking features made your heart race. Despite your reluctance to admit it, he was undeniably handsome, far from the "demon" the stories painted him to be.

"Yah, she is just a bit frightened," Yunho said as he rose to his feet, and Hongjoong nodded, his gaze remained fixed on you.

"What's your name, lady?"

"Y/N..."

"I'm Hongjoong, the captain. This is Yunho, our doctor." You nodded as he continued, "I'm sorry for your fall into the sea. It was indeed our attack that caused the ship you were on to sink."

"No... I owe you my gratitude. You were the ones who saved me."

He shrugged with a warm smile. "Just take some time to rest, and we'll arrange for you to be taken to the nearest town."

You nodded, and they stepped out, leaving you to gather your thoughts. You stumbled out of bed, your feet heavy as you made your way to the door, only to be met with the murmur of several men outside.

You stumbled out of bed, your feet heavy as you made your way to the door, only to be met with the murmur of several men outside.

"What is the captain thinking? Bringing a woman aboard?"

"Exactly! This is bound to bring us misfortune!"

"Or maybe he plans to trade her? She's not too shabby, after all..."

"But I heard she's being sent to other towns."

"Is it really that straightforward?"

You clamped a hand over your mouth, panic rising within you, tears welling in your eyes as your heart raced. They were clearly not good men. But what could you do? Escape? That was out of the question. How could you prove to them that you wouldn't bring them bad luck? It was easy to say, but how could you actually do it? Just as your mind spiraled into chaos, loud voices broke through your thoughts.

"Why are we having abura soba again?" Hongjoong grumbled.

"Because they're delicious," Yunho replied.

"That's excessive, don't you think?" Hongjoong shot back. "I eat abura soba five days a week!"

"Is that a problem? The crew loves it," Wooyoung chimed in as he knocked on your door. When you opened it, he stood there with a steaming bowl of noodles.

"Hey there, Y/N, right? Here, if you don't mind, I made this for you," Wooyoung said, placing the bowl on your table. "I'm Wooyoung, by the way."

"Thank you," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. Though you were wary of possible poison, your hunger overpowered your caution. You took a bite, and to your surprise, it was delicious. Before long, the bowl was empty, and you watched as the others busied themselves with cleaning up.

"Hey, Y/N," Wooyoung approached you, balancing several bowls in his hands. "Are you done? You can hand the bowl back to me."

"Oh, it's fine. Let me help you. You look a bit worn out."

"Thanks, I appreciate it." You joined him in gathering bowls and chopsticks, following him to the kitchen. As you walked, you took in your surroundings, contemplating your next move... perhaps earning their trust was the best strategy for survival, at least for now.

As you stepped into the kitchen, you noticed Hongjoong frantically working on something, clearly in a rush.

"Hey, hyung. Just try not to shatter the bowl again," Wooyoung remarked, already scrubbing the dishes.

"I won't," Hongjoong replied, but his next words nearly sent the bowl tumbling.

"Um… are you going to lend him a hand?" you whispered to Wooyoung.

"Nope. I'm busy. Maybe you should go see what he's up to."  

With that, you approached Hongjoong cautiously. This could be a perfect chance to earn his trust.

"Hongjoong?"

"Yah?"

"Do you need any help?" You glanced at the mess on the table, where he was clumsily beating eggs.

"No, I'm good. Oh no!"

You quickly caught the bowls and chopsticks as they teetered, relieved they didn't break.

"Hmm… if you're okay with it, I could cook something up for you."

"Really?"

"I actually work as a cook."

"Ah, so you're just like Wooyoung."

"I guess so. What do you feel like eating?"

"Just not abura soba, please." You grinned and nodded. "And I'm not a fan of vegetables."

"Got it."

You set to work with the ingredients spread out on the table, whipping up the dishes you know best while ensuring the table remains neat. Before long, your masterpiece was complete. You entered the dining hall, cradling a bowl of fragrant soup. Hongjoong stood tall, his eyes widening at the sight of you.

"Oh wow! That smells so good!" he exclaimed, quickly blowing on the noodles before digging in. "This is absolutely delicious!" A sense of pride swelled within you as you witnessed his joy, a reminder of why you chose the culinary path.

"Perhaps you should be my personal chef," he joked, a playful smirk on his lips. You smile back, taking his words lightly, fully aware that you won't be staying long here. 

Hongjoong seemed to relax a bit, his shoulders dropping slightly as he savored each bite, his eyes closed in blissful contentment.

"I can't believe I've never had anything like this before," he said, opening his eyes to meet yours with a newfound appreciation. "You really are talented."

You blushed slightly, grateful for the compliment. "Thank you, Hongjoong. It's just something I enjoy doing."

As you sat down across from him, Wooyoung wandered in, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Hey, what's going on here? Did I miss the party?"

"Just having a nice meal," Hongjoong replied, gesturing to the now half-empty bowl in front of him.

Wooyoung's expression softened, a hint of surprise crossing his face. "Can I have a taste?"

"Nope. That's mine." 

Hongjoong immediately finished them all, not letting Wooyoung eat. 

"Yah!Hyung!" "Who told you not to help me?" 

You chuckled, watching them quarreling playfully. It appeared that this was part of their everyday life. From this viewpoint, they were completely disconnected from any notion of evil. 

In the days that followed, it felt as if you had stepped into the role of Hongjoong's personal chef. Initially, he continued to enjoy Wooyoung's meals, but he would occasionally drop hints that your cooking was just as delightful. Eventually, you took the plunge and prepared a dish just for him, hoping to win his trust. The joy on his face was infectious; he began to request your cook regularly, and soon, even some of the crew members were intrigued by your skills. 

Cooking for them brought you immense joy, as their satisfaction filled you with happiness. Over time, your initial apprehension faded, and the thought of leaving began to slip from your mind. The idea of visiting the nearby town seemed to vanish. Yet, in recent days, Hongjoong's demeanor shifted, making you reconsider your plans.

Did you do something to upset him? How could you make up for him? You worried about whether you would be killed for this? No. What you were concerned about was what if Hongjoong didn't like you?

He had grown somewhat distant, his warmth replaced by a chill that left you unsettled. This was especially evident when you were in the kitchen with Wooyoung; his coldness bordered on anger. Today was no different.

"Are you alright, Y/N? You look a bit pale," Wooyoung asked, concern etched on his face.

"Just feeling a little under the weather..." you replied with a bittersweet smile, though the cramping in your abdomen made it hard to stand. You suspected the long days at sea and the cold had taken a toll on your body. "Hiss..."

"Maybe you should take a break?" "But I want to make some food for Hongjoong…" You winced, wanting to refuse and continue helping in the kitchen, but the pain rendered your limbs weak, making cooking impossible.

"Nah. You should go back to your room." 

"But what if he didn't like me?" 

"Huh?"

"I mean…he may hate me if I don't cook for him." 

"He wouldn't think so.

"But…"

"No. Just go take a rest, okay? I can handle." Wooyoung stopped you. "Can you walk?"

"I think so?" In reality, each step felt like a monumental challenge.  

"Let me help you." Wooyoung took your hand and supported your shoulders, a moment that caught Hongjoong's eye.

"What are you doing?" he approached, anger flashing in his eyes, but as he noticed the pain etched on your face, his expression shifted. "What's wrong? Are you okay, Y/N?"

"She's sick." Wooyoung said. 

"I'm not asking you." 

Wooyoung rolled his eyes playfully, knowing Hongjoong was jealous. 

"So now I will send her to her room." 

"No." Hongjoong pulled you to his arms carefully. "I will send her and you cook." 

"Okay, okay." 

—----

"Do you need any medicine?" Hongjoong inquired as he gently laid you down on the bed. "Or should I call Yunho for assistance?"

"Actually..." you winced, the pain making your words slow. "It's just period cramps."

"Oh... umm... would something warm help? Maybe hot water?"

You nodded, and he quickly dashed out to fetch a cup of steaming water.

"Here, be careful." He supported your back as you sat up, handing you the warm cup.

"Thank you." You took a sip, feeling the soothing warmth spread through you. It wasn't just the hot water; it was Hongjoong's tender care that made your heart flutter. You couldn't deny the twinge of sadness when he seemed distant. You longed for his smile and the sweet words he used to share. Unbeknownst to you, your feelings for him were already blossoming.

"Do you need more?" As you lifted your gaze, you noticed how close he was, causing a blush to creep onto your cheeks. "No, it's okay."

Hongjoong smiled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he noticed your embarrassment. "Alright, but let me know if you need anything else. I'm here for you." 

"Thank you," you replied with a nod. "But Wooyoung really needs to step up; he's in charge of everyone's lunch."

Hongjoong feigned a cough as he plopped down beside you, irritation evident in his voice. "It's no big deal; he's used to it. You shouldn't worry about him." You stifled a laugh—wasn't he just a tad envious?

"Nope. Everyone seems to be eating a lot more these days," you teased, enjoying the playful banter as his jealousy was unmistakable.

"Why are you so concerned about him? Do you have a crush on him?" His question took you by surprise, and it seemed to catch him off guard too. "Ugh, forget it."

"Does it bother you who I like?" You asked. His cheeks flushed a deep red, and he quickly averted his gaze.

"No, it's not that," Hongjoong stammered, his eyes darting around the room as if searching for an escape route. "It's just…I didn't expect you to be interested in him. He's always been so…carefree and unpredictable." 

I once had a crush, but it wasn't on Wooyoung. A soft chuckle escaped your lips as a warm sensation blossomed in your chest. After inhaling deeply, you were prepared to share your truth. "Hongjoong… there's something special about what I feel… when you're near, my heart starts to race. I think I might be falling for you."

"Seriously?" Your confession surprised him, and a shy yet joyful smile spread across his face. "Were you just teasing me?"

"Not at all. I would never lie about how I feel."

He leaned in closer, his eyes searching yours for any sign of jest. The sincerity in your tone echoed through the room, and the tension between you seemed to dissolve. Hongjoong's hand, which had been resting on the bedsheets, gently brushed against yours, and you didn't pull away.

"I never thought... I mean, I've always been there for you, but I never expected..." He trailed off, searching for the right words.

"Expected what?" You prompted, a hint of vulnerability creeping into your voice.

Hongjoong looked down, his fingers entwining with yours. "I never imagined that you would see me as more than just a friend. I've always admired you, from afar, but I never dared to dream that you felt the same way."

A smile tugged at the corners of your lips, and you leaned in, closing the small gap between you. 

"I think I like you, too." Hongjoong's expression softened, and he pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around you. It was a gentle, comforting embrace that spoke volumes of the feelings he had been holding back.

"Thank you," he whispered, his breath warm against your ear. "I've been waiting for this moment for so long. I'm glad you feel the same way."

Smiling, you gave him a nod after a gazing. Without hesitation, he leaned in, pressing his lips against yours, catching you by surprise, but you quickly melted into the kiss. 

As you lay back on the bed, he hovered over you, the kiss unbroken. He was tender and cautious, as if he feared making you uneasy.

"I have a good way to reduce the period pain." He settled your hand on his cheek, giving a peck on that. "Do you wanna give it a try?"

You knew what he meant and what he wanted to do. Of course, you wanted to, too. 

"Please." 

"Wait for a while." He pecked at you after leaving for a towel and condom. Placing the towel under your thighs, he then lifted up your dress to slide down your panties. 

"I love you, y/n." He towered you, pulling out his cock from his panties. He reached out, his fingers gently tracing the contours of your cheek, as if committing your beauty to memory. You closed your eyes, a soft sigh escaping your lips, inviting him closer.

Their lips met in a kiss that was at once tender and passionate, filled with a longing that had been building for what felt like an eternity. He guided his member to your entrance, which was already wrapped up in a condom, then slowly eased into you. 

You moaned out as you broke the kiss, the sensation of being filled up was weird you could say. Hongjoong, same as you, felt a little bit uneasy because of your sticky blood. 

"It hurts…" A deep frown creased your forehead as the familiar grip of menstrual pain returned. Watching you suffer, Hongjoong's heart ached with sorrow. He lingered, allowing your pain to fade gradually, before he began to move in and out. His rhythm matched the tenderness of his kisses, a blend of softness and intensity.

You wrapped your arms around his shoulder, allowing him to go deeper. His cock could easily reach your sensitive spot thanks to your blood. Settling your legs around his waist, he rolled his hips at a steady pace. 

"Shit, it feels good." "Hongjoong…" "It's okay, love." His head landed in your neck, dropping a broken kiss on that. It began with a gentle brush of lips against the warm, smooth skin, a tentative exploration that sent shivers down your spine. He deepened his kiss as he started to rush, his lips lingering softly on the curve of the neck as well as his thick cock─grazing your hot wall deliciously as he moved back and forth. 

"Joong…it's…fuck…"His hard tip suddenly hit your sweet spot, making you whole body squirm and let out a shy moan. "Here?" He hit it again, you couldn't help but tighten your wall. The wave of excitement rushed throughout your body each time he collided with it. You loved it. 

"Please, joong. I need more." "As you wish,  baby girl." He lifted up his hips, withdrawing his cock until only his tip inside you, then shoving back with a great force. You arched your back, opening your mouth for better breathing. The crash he made caused you to run out of oxygen. 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He fucked you so fast and hit the same spot dead on. All the heat gathered in your lower core and formed a knot. Pain?It was already faded away and instead by your climax. Your wall clenched his cock, urging him to bring you to the edge. He picked up his pace, panting heavily and letting out a throaty moan. 

Your legs were placed on his shoulder, oh, he went so deep. He sat up straight, grabbing your knees and pushed into your wetness. The noise from outside faded away, leaving only the rapid thumping of your heart and the skin slapping sound, drowning out the chaos beyond. His ball hit your ass each time his tip reached the deepest, making you groan without care. 

His hand found his way to your collar, pulling it down to explode your fine chest. He pushed up your bra, squeezing your breast hard while teasing your nipple, earning a shy chuckle from your lips. "Gotta taste you." He leaned down to suck your nipple, his tongue licked everywhere he could reach. 

The double excitement made you spin. There was nothing left but only the kissing sound and the skin slapping sound bouncing off the wall. 

"I'm so close." He huffed, his thrust lost its rhythm as he found the way to peak. You, too. After a few thrust and a long throaty moan, both of you came. "Goodness." Your embrace tightened as you two didn't want to leave. Catching his breath, he pecked at your cheek before removing. 

"Am I right?Does it hurt now?" He asked, a grin played on his lips. 

"No." You shook your head. "Thank you." You gazed into each other's eyes, their faces flushed with the aftermath of their intimacy.

"Hey, I made lunch." Wooyoung suddenly knocked on your door, giving you two shocks. "But I think you two are full now?"

"No…ugh…we'll eat later." Hongjoong stammered. 

"Alright. You two will be hungry for sure especially after an intense team sport!" Wooyoung teased. 

"Shut up!Wooyoung!Leave!" 

"Okay, okay~Call me if you need more condoms." 

"I'll just kill you, you asshole!" 

Ah…it was so embarrassing.

tag list:@angelsaway, @yeosangcutie0615

[padfootagain]

Love in Verses (XL)

Chapter 40 : ‘Where I does not exist, nor you, so close that your hand on my chest is my hand, so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.’

Hi! Here is a new chapter! Alright, things can’t be perfect all the time, let’s spice things a little bit…

I hope you like this chapter! Tell me what you think!

****

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader (professor!AU)

Warnings: slow burn, angst, hurt, hurt/comfort, tooth-rotting fluff in later chapters, some scenes in later chapters will have heavy sexual themes even if it’s not explicit nsfw description, so no minors here

Summary: Your life seems perfect. You're engaged, your career is thriving as you become an assistant professor at Trinity College, and this Andrew Hozier-Byrne you're sharing an office with seems to be a nice guy you hope to call a friend soon. Life seems to be smiling at you... until everything goes sour. When your fiancé breaks up with you, your perfect world shatters. And when your colleague also gets his heart broken soon after, your shared office seems to be a curse rather than a blessing. But Andrew seems determined to mend your broken hearts... Will things finally go according to plan?

Word Count: 2408

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s masterlist – Main masterlist

Sonnet XVII

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,

or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.

I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,

in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms

but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;

thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,

risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.

I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;

so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,

so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,

so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

Pablo Neruda, One Hundred Love Sonnets

It was kind of ridiculous how stressed you were about this.

After all, you had already met Andrew’s parents once, and they were nice. Really nice.

Still, for your first encounter, you were a friend of Andrew’s… not his girlfriend… Yeah, that was why you were so nervous now. What if they thought you were nice while there was nothing but friendship binding you to their son, but now that you were more than a friend to him… what if they changed their mind about you? Besides, you had never met his brother Jon. Maybe he wouldn’t like you at all…

You were surprised at how relaxed Andrew was, though. He had been so worried when he asked you to come over to his parents for dinner, but now that you were getting ready to leave, he seemed to be nothing but merry.

At least, his shenanigans brought smiles to your face.

“Stop it! God, you’re insufferable…” you complained, playfully pushing his hand away as he started poking at your ribs again. “Babe! It tickles and I’m trying to get my hair done!”

“Your hair looks perfect already.”

“It’s not…”

“Kiss me… please… please… please… kiss me…” he stressed each demand poking your shoulder.

“God…”

You laughed, turned your head so he could kiss you. But then he kissed you again, and again…

“I need to finish getting ready, or we’ll be late.”

“We can be late. I’m always late. They’ll worry I’m sick or that their son was replaced by some kind of clone if I don’t arrive late for dinner.”

You rolled your eyes.

“I want to make a good impression.”

His smile grew from playful to tender.

“They already like you.”

“They barely know me.”

“They like you.”

“You’re just saying that so I won’t panic.”

“No! I’m not! They like you!”

“I’ve never met your brother, he can’t like me.”

“He does. I talk his ears off about you, and he likes you already.”

You couldn’t refrain a smirk.

“You talk about me all the time, huh? Someone’s a little obsessed…”

You expected a scoff, or something of the kind. But Andrew nodded.

“Of course, I am. How could I not be obsessed with my gorgeous girlfriend?”

You shied away as you put your hairbrush down.

“Alright, I’m ready to go.”

You called for Elwood, and he came running into the hallway, happily moving his tail as you scratched his head.

“We’re going, buddy! Come on!”

But Andrew stopped you, holding your hand in his so you would turn to him again. He was smiling.

“I’m really happy you’re doing this, honey. Thank you, for everything.”

You weren’t sure what he meant by everything. It sounded like you were doing him a favour, when… you were the grateful one for letting you into his life.

“There’s no need to thank me for anything…”

“There’s a need to thank you for everything.”

He kissed you before you could protest, a long, tender kiss that made you lose track of what you wanted to say.

Andrew loved you so fucking much.

He knew that he had an idiotic, adoring look on his face when he turned to you having this simple thought, but he couldn’t help it.

You were eating your meal, complementing Andrew’s mother on her cooking, and he recognised that happy glimmer in your eyes, the one you had whenever you ate something truly delicious. In all fairness, Raine’s cooking was delicious. He watched as you sipped on the beer John had offered you earlier, making you laugh as he paid his debt.

And you fitted so well in his life, in his home, in his family. You listened as Jon talked about his next project, this short film he was preparing, and your interest was genuine when you asked him a question.

Andrew lost track of the conversation for a moment, as he stared at you, a stupid smile on his face. Seeing you like this, in this house where he had spent most of his childhood, where he had gathered so many happy memories, where he had lived such challenging parts of his life… this home that meant so much to him… and it felt so right to have you here, being a part of his world…

You turned to him, laughing, something teasing in your eyes, mischief painted all over your features. God, he loved you, he loved you so much…

“Hmmm… sounds very interesting indeed, Jon,” you nodded, and Andrew forced himself to listen to the conversation again, because of how dangerous your tone was.

“I’ll get the pictures,” Jon offered, and Andrew’s eyes grew round.

“Don’t you dare!”

“You were so cute as a child,” Raine argued, clearly torturing her son on purpose, and Andrew glowered at her.

“Mom…”

“I want to see the photos,” you added.

“Nope. Absolutely not!”

“Why not? I’m sure you were adorable.”

“I was not.”

“Actually,” John intervened, “I think we still have the tape of that concert, you know the one…”

Andrew stopped breathing, looked at his family in horror.

“Absolutely not!”

“What are you talking about?” you asked, and Andrew narrowed his eyes at your excitement.

“There was this one time Andrew sang in public… that didn’t go so well,” Jon explained.

“No…” Andrew moaned, and he knew you were struggling not to laugh.

“What happened?”

“My balls dropped,” was his only explanation, and you were gone in a fit of laughter.

“At the worst moment,” Jon laughed as well. “That timing…”

“It was horrible,” Andrew shook his head, but he struggled not to laugh too. “I started to cry, and had to wait for an adult to come and remove me from the stage.”

“No…” you breathed, your laughter gone and a sadder look on your face now. You reached for his arm. “I’m so sorry, that must have been terrible.”

“Yeah, it was awful…”

“What did you do after that?”

“I had to do it again the next day.”

“Oh no!”

“I did well though. On the second try.”

Raine looked around at the empty plates left on the table, had a mischievous smile of her own.

“Well… I think you two should show Y/N some pictures, while Andy and I clean up the table and get everything ready for dessert.”

“No… Don’t show her anything too bad…” Andrew groaned, burying his face in his hands.

“Come on! I want to see what baby Andy looked like,” you insisted.

“I was horrendous as a baby.”

“Of course, you weren’t. You were a baby, you had to be cute.”

“I wasn’t. I was terrifyingly ugly.”

You shook your head with an amused smile.

“I don’t believe that for a second.”

Raine stood up and you were stirred away from the table by Andrew’s father and brother, who were determined to show you old photographs of your lover. And Andrew pretended to argue, but he didn’t really mind. He was entertained by their shenanigans more than anything else.

He and his mother cleaned the table, and he was loading plates in the dishwasher when Raine turned to him with a bright grin.

“I’m really happy for you and Y/N, Andy,” she confessed in a quiet voice, to which her younger son answered with a bright grin. “She truly is lovely… Smart, kind, funny…”

Andrew’s heart fluttered at her words, he averted his eyes to hide his blush and the grin he couldn’t refrain.

“Yeah… she is,” he nodded.

“And you seem happy with her.”

“I am. I really am, mom.”

“I knew she’d be good for you… when we met her at your reading session, the other day… I just knew. I knew she’d give you the kind of love you deserve.”

“Thanks, mom…”

“How serious is it, then?”

Andrew took a second to answer, to gather his emotions into coherent words. He thought about downplaying it all, about hiding how much he truly felt for you… but Raine was his mother. He could never hide anything from her…

“It’s… it’s pretty serious, yeah.”

She looked at him, expectant. His heart grew warm as he thought of you.

“I… it’s very serious,” he nodded, his voice quiet, one of tender confessions. “I really want this to work. She’s… she’s amazing, and… I’m so happy with her. And I… I love her. Like… I was already in love with her before we actually got together. And I… I only seem to love her more and more every day. I… I keep on falling in love with her again and again, and I don’t really know how that’s possible, like it seems endless even though I already have so much love for her, but… yeah… She’s the real thing, that’s for sure. I… I love her so much…”

Raine grinned, something emotional glistening in her eyes, rested a soothing hand on her son’s arm.

“Your heart chose well. She’s amazing. Your father and I appreciate her a lot, already. And it’s obvious Jon is taking a liking to her too.”

“I’m glad.”

She tilted her head.

“But?”

Andrew heaved a sigh, she could always read him like an open book…

“But… I’m worried sometimes… like… I’m worried that my relationship with Sam could slow me down. I’m… I’m worried that I might fuck this up because of it…”

Remnants of your fight flashed before his eyes.

“I’m just… I’m worried. I’m scared, too. I’m scared she’s going to leave. I’m scared she’ll realise she’s too good for me…”

But his mother shushed him.

“Don’t let these thoughts hold you down,” she admonished. “Y/N loves you dearly, it’s obvious. You simply need time to adjust in this new relationship, to accept that this is how you’re supposed to be loved. You’ll make it through that struggle, I know you will. You just need time. And so does Y/N.”

Slowly, he nodded, trying to believe her words.

“I just… I’ve never felt like that before, even with Sam,” Andrew confessed, looking at dirty plates he had already set in the dishwasher, although he couldn’t see any of them. “That’s… overwhelming.”

“It means you truly love her. It means that’s the kind of love that’s truly worth fighting for.”

A knock on the kitchen door startled them both, and you appeared carrying empty glasses.

“Just so you know… Jon has found the tape,” you chirped happily, while Andrew’s eyes grew round and he blushed in embarrassment.

“I’m going to kill him…” were Andrew’s only words before he exited the kitchen, but he couldn’t refrain a smile as the sound of your laughter mingled with his mother’s.

You left his parents’ home late that night, you were sleepy and let Andrew drive you home. You were still merry and full of love, and Andrew adored the sight. You had promised Raine and John to come again at the next family dinner, in two weeks. Andrew could not have been happier…

When he pulled over before your building it was past midnight already. He waited for you to kiss him goodnight, but you lingered in his car.

“This was a lovely evening. Thank you again, for inviting me.”

“Thank you for coming.”

“I really like your family a lot. They’re so nice. It’s obvious where your kindness comes from.”

“Thanks.”

You reached for his hand.

“Stay with me tonight.”

Andrew chuckled.

“Tempting offer, but I’m too tired for anything to happen. And I have a reputation I’m trying to uphold. Can’t disappoint you so quickly in our relationship.”

You rolled your eyes.

“I meant, for sleeping. Like… sleepy sleeping. Not sexy sleeping.”

He hummed, refraining a laugh, but you spoke again. You looked adorable like this, your eyelids heavy with exhaustion, tenderness putting a soft smile on your lips. And the touch of your fingers upon his was gentle, grounding.

“I like that. Falling asleep beside you. Please, stay.”

How could he say no to such a plea?

He turned off the engine, and you grinned at him.

He followed you outside his car, inside your building, in the elevator, in the corridor, in your hallway, in your bathroom, in your bed. He let you guide him in these places that already felt familiar, he knew he would have followed you anywhere. Wasn’t that crazy? To love someone so deeply? So soon?

You snuggled into his side as soon as you were both under the covers, as soon as the lights were off. In the darkness, he could only hear and feel your presence, in the rhythm of your quiet breathing, in the dip of the mattress under your weight, in the warmth of your body holding his in a safe embrace, in the gentle squeeze of your hand around his fingers.

He closed his eyes, let your nearness draw him to the verge of sleep, but then your voice came from the darkness. In this bed with you, he wasn’t so sure where his body ended and yours began.

“I heard you talking with your mother.”

Andrew’s eyes snapped open.

“I didn’t mean to… I was just carrying empty glasses to the kitchen, to get a refill for your brother and your father. But I overheard your conversation and… I couldn’t bring myself to interrupt. I… I feel a little bad about it.”

“You didn’t do it on purpose,” he conceded, although he felt uneasy knowing you had overheard his confession.

“I… I love you, Andy. I love you so much. I… I feel the same as you do. And I’m… I’m also really scared that this is not going to work. But I trust you. And I know that you’re better than Frank. It might take a little time, like your mother said, but… I want to believe that we can love each other the way we deserve.”

“I’m going to love you the best I can.”

“I know. And I will do the same.”

He kissed your hair, heard the quiet breath you let out as your body melted against his.

“And… honey?”

“Hmmm?”

“You do deserve me. You’re such a good person, Andy… you’re amazing. I’m already happier with you than I’ve ever been with Frank. Don’t be scared of that, okay? I love you so much, baby.”

“I love you too. And I’m happy with you as well.”

The promise he made you was one he knew he could never break.

“I’d do anything to make you happy, Y/N. Anything at all.”

[lev1hei1chou]

Physics Class

Dad!Gojo x reader Genre: Fluff Synopsis: Gojo teaches physics to his child, and it doesn't go the way they want it to. Masterlist

It was a typical evening in the Gojo household, or so it seemed. Satoru Gojo was seated at the dining table with his teenage child and a pile of physics textbooks. His usual demeanor was replaced with a look of sheer desperation as he attempted to explain the intricacies of quantum mechanics.

"Okay, so imagine this," Gojo began, summoning his Infinity to illustrate his point. "You have a particle, and it can be in multiple places at once..."

Haru, stared blankly at his father, eyes glazed over with confusion. "But Dad, I still don't get it. How can something be in two places at the same time?"

Gojo rubbed his temples, mentally cursing the day he decided to take on the role of tutor. "Well, you see, it's like... umm... Hollow Purple!" With a flourish of his hand, he conjured the swirling vortex of energy, hoping it would somehow make the concept clearer.

Haru's expression didn't change. "It just looks like purple fog to me, Dad."

Gojo sighed dramatically. "This is harder than fighting curses," he muttered under his breath.

Suddenly, a light bulb seemed to go off in Gojo's head. "I know! Let's try a practical demonstration." Within seconds, he summoned a small rubber ball and a series of miniature black holes using his powers.

Haru's eyes widened in alarm. "Dad, are you sure this is safe?"

But before he could protest further, Gojo released the ball into the gravitational field of the black holes. Chaos ensued as the ball disappeared and reappeared in seemingly random locations.

"Dad, I think you just broke the laws of physics," Haru exclaimed, a mix of awe and terror in his voice.

Gojo chuckled nervously. "Well, umm... let's just say it's a... creative interpretation."

Despite the chaotic lesson, Haru couldn't help but smile at their father's antics. "Thanks, Dad. I still don't understand quantum mechanics, but at least I had fun trying."

Gojo grinned proudly, tousling his hair affectionately. "That's my kid. Now, let's tackle the next chapter: Kinetic Energy!"

As Gojo delved deeper into the world of teaching normal subjects, he realized that traditional methods simply weren't cutting it. So, he decided to incorporate his sorcery skills into the curriculum, much to the dismay of his teenager.

Satoru decided to demonstrate the concept of kinetic energy using his Infinity. He summoned a couple of marbles and set them rolling on the table, intending to show how their speed affected their energy.

"See, Haru, the faster the marble moves, the more energy it has," Gojo explained, trying to sound as convincing as possible.

His son nodded along, trying to follow his father's logic. But when Gojo decided to ramp up the demonstration by using his powers to increase the speed of the marbles to near-supersonic levels, chaos ensued.

The marbles careened off the table, ricocheting around the room like tiny bullets. Furniture was overturned, vases shattered, and Gojo found himself ducking for cover behind the sofa.

"Dad, I think we should stick to the textbook," Haru yelled over the chaos, dodging a marble that whizzed past his head.

Gojo emerged from his hiding spot, looking sheepish. "Right, maybe that was a bit much."

The sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow over the Gojo household. The door swung open, and you walked in. You were greeted not by the usual calm ambiance of home, but by a scene of utter chaos.

"Baby, what on earth happened here?" you exclaimed, taking in the overturned furniture, cracked decorations and the faint scent of burnt rubber lingering in the air.

Your husband looked up from his haphazard pile of textbooks, relief washing over his exhausted features at the sight of his wife. "Oh, thank goodness you're here. We've had a bit of a... situation."

Your son sat at the table with tears glistening in his eyes, surrounded by scattered papers and half-hearted attempts at calculations. He looked up at his mother with a mixture of frustration and defeat.

"Mom, I just don't understand any of this. We tried so much and nothing worked," he confessed, his voice trembling with emotion.

Your heart broke at the sight of your son's distress. You crossed the room in a few quick strides, wrapping him in a comforting hug. "It's okay, sweetheart. We'll figure this out together."

Turning to Gojo, you found her husband in a state of near-panic, his usual smirk replaced by a look of sheer desperation. "Love, what's going on? Why is everything in shambles?"

Gojo ran a hand through his disheveled hair, his frustration palpable. "I've been trying to help Haru study for his physics exam, but nothing seems to be sinking in. I've tried every trick in the book, and then some my personal tricks. It didn't do much though."

You couldn't help but chuckle at the sight of your usually unflappable husband on the brink of a meltdown. "Well, why don't we take a break, and then try some different approach?."

[justwinginglife]

One Chance

25 Days of Simpmas: Day Fifteen December 15th: Osamu Dazai, Rank 11 Anime: Bungo Stray Dogs Event Masterlist

Ironically, three of the men on my top 25 list are voiced by Kaiji Tang, and two of them are back to back. Do I have a type? Maybe.

Also, it is a Dazai fic, so there are brief mentionings of suicide because again, it is Dazai.

“Do you wanna-”

“Commit a double suicide? Dazai, for the millionth time, no.”

Dazai whined. “What if I was gonna say go out to dinner with me, huh? So rude to just reject me before I’ve even finished asking.”

“Answer’s still no.”

He sighed dramatically, “You are a cruel, cruel woman, you know that?”

As a favor to your boss and longtime friend, Ango Sakaguchi, you’d left your job at the Special Division to follow Dazai to the Detective Agency. While you’d personally never met the man before, you had heard many stories about him, and initially came to the conclusion that he must be an impressive man. Putting aside the fact that you’d been asked to protect him as a favor to Ango, you thought you might actually like getting to work with a man as famous -or infamous, depending on the person you asked- as him. You thought it might be interesting. Fun, even. 

But now that you’d spent every day by his side, working closely with him as his partner, you just knew, deep down in your soul, that this man, this bizarre, enigmatic, borderline psychotic -again, depending on the person you asked, maybe he wasn’t even borderline- freak of a man, was going to drive you absolutely and utterly insane. 

How many times had you rejected him now? And yet, he still pursued you. And how many other women had he asked out, right in front of you? And then resumed his pursuit of you. He couldn’t possibly think that you’d take him seriously after all this time. And yet, he still tried. 

God, what had he done in the Detective Agency to amuse himself before you arrived? Had he harassed Yosano the same way? Or were you his personal favorite form of entertainment? Did he just like the way you turned him down? Was he a masochist? 

You shuddered at the thought. Yeah. He definitely seemed like the type to be a masochist. 

Wait.

So… if he’s a masochist… if he’s just going to keep asking me out over and over again… then the best course of action is to…

“Actually, you know what, sure. Let’s go out.”

Dazai dropped his glass and it shattered on the floor. “Uh. What?”

You bit back a laugh, attempting to keep a serious face on. “I said sure. You and me. We’ll go on a date.”

He blinked. And then he laughed. “Oh, you truly are cruel. You almost had me for a minute there.”

“I’m being serious. Dead serious. Let’s go on a date, just the two of us. Hell, we can even go right now.”

His eyes locked onto yours in careful examination.There were those cold, calculating eyes you’d come to know so well. So piercing that you felt rooted to the spot, that you felt the need to confess to crimes you’d not even committed. The eyes that discerned fact from fiction, that forced submission from oppression. Though there were plenty of times you were grateful for that cold calculation of his -even though, admittedly, it’d been somewhat unsettling to see them in action- they were only a blessing when they were working for your benefit. But now, as those same eyes peered into your soul, attempting to decipher your very existence, you once again found that his insight was nothing short of eerie and you hoped you’d never again be on the receiving end of his penetrative gaze. 

“What’s the problem?” You asked casually.

“You don’t say yes. You never say yes. Why today? What’s different about today?” The flirtatious and playful manner in which he’d previously been engaging you with had all but disappeared, now replaced with interrogative language. 

You stood your ground. “Why not today? C’mon. Let’s see if this date is actually so great after all.”

He let out a small laugh but the sound was empty and lacking any real humor. “Ahh, I get it. You think if we go out on a date, I’ll be satisfied and stop asking you out. And it’ll be all the better if the date goes terrible and I end up getting bored of you; that’s what you’re hoping for, am I right?” He leaned in to hear your response, but his tone was self assured, like he already knew the answer, and was allowing you a reply merely for show. 

Damn, he was good. Ah, well. Cat was out of the bag. Might as well roll with it. You narrowed the gap between you even further, leaning in to meet his domineering gaze. “And what if I am? Do you think you’d even know what to do if the date went well? If you liked it? If you wanted another? You wouldn’t know what to do with yourself. You like the chase, the hunt, the adrenaline. What’ll you do if it turns out I domesticate you, huh? If you turn into nothing more than a lovesick puppy? Someone as smart as you. Wouldn’t it kill you to be just another fool, like any other man?”

His lips curled into a sly smirk. “Well, well. This is turning out to be quite the interesting conversation. First, you lure me in by offering to give me everything I want and then you try to scare me away by making it seem less appealing, by making it seem terrifying, even. But what’ll you do if you’re the one who falls in love with me? Did you ever think about that? And have you considered that maybe I’ve already fallen for you? That maybe I don’t mind you ‘domesticating’ me,” He chuckled, “As you so crassly put it.”

You hadn’t thought of that. Sure, he’d been persistent, but you’d never once thought he’d been serious in his advances. Well…maybe just the once. Just the first time he’d asked. 

Ironic as it was, as tenacious as he was, the first time you’d met, he’d actually been somewhat normal. He’d been kind, he’d been respectful, he’d been welcoming. In fact, after recalling all the impressive feats he was known for, you were sure that, with his level of intelligence, he’d guessed the reason why you’d come; that even without telling him, he’d known that Ango had sent you, that his friend had sent you, that he’d worried for Dazai’s sake and sent you in his stead, to be the shoulder that he couldn’t be, and that’s why, on that first fateful day, Dazai greeted you like an old friend. Like a dear friend.

And he kept you close, kept you safe. As though he dare not tread on the gift he’d been given. 

It wasn’t until you got to know each other better that he started to become more eccentric. Or, in other words, he went back to his usual shenanigans. He’d run off to god knows where doing god knows what, maybe one day he was jumping off a bridge, maybe the next he’d be haggling for a vial of rare poison, but still, each and every case would come to its dramatic end, always by his hands. And dramatic was right. He always liked to put on a show, make every case seem grand, make every deduction seem riveting, turn every accusation into a spectacle. And he was extravagant with everyone, but sometimes, you wondered if maybe he was more so with you. If he was ridiculous to make you smile, if he was rambunctious to make you laugh. You noticed he always seemed just a little more comical when you were feeling down than when you weren’t. 

So the first time he asked you out, you almost said yes. The glint in his eyes was so contagious, it was hard to want to say otherwise. 

But your better judgment -and a healthy dose of caution after working so many years with the Special Division- told you that you barely knew the guy, so you turned him down.

After he’d asked a few more times, each time sounding more frivolous than the last, you’d come to the conclusion that he had never intended to seriously date you. And you were fine with it; it was all for the better. But then he started asking out women right and left whenever you’d work cases together and though you tried not to let it bother you, you wondered if his feelings really were so fickle and shallow. You wondered if he’d ever felt anything for you at all.

So now his silly, little shenanigans didn’t seem so silly anymore. Now, they seemed stupid. Now, if you were having a bad day, he just made it even worse when he tried to cheer you up by taking a detour to the amusement park, using the excuse that he “wanted to know what it felt like falling from a Ferris Wheel,” or when he commandeered a horse drawn carriage for a romantic ride through the park, because he was supposedly more “productive” when using transport that allowed fresh air to stimulate his brain instead of wasting away in stuffy cars, as if windows didn’t exist. Where before you might’ve found him thoughtful, chivalrous even, now you just felt he was wasting time. Now, you felt he was irresponsible, inconsiderate, incompetent. Now, you’d rather work with anyone but him.

But you stayed by his side anyway. Kept your promise to Ango. Sure, you might charge an expensive bill here and there to the Secret Division (enjoy a nice dinner one night, go see an opera the next) as reparations for the psychological damage inflicted upon you as a result of being Dazai’s partner, but you kept your promise all the same. 

You just hadn’t expected how infinite his persistence would be.

Even when he thought you’d say no, even when he knew you’d say no, he still asked you for the pleasure of your company. 

So today was as good a day as any to put this whole dramatic affair to rest. Today, you’d do the one thing you never imagined yourself doing in a million years. Today, you’d go on a date with Dazai. 

And you were sure he’d find you uninteresting, you were sure you’d find him displeasing, the night would end, and then you would both go back to your very busy lives, never again recounting the mistake that was your shared date. 

Now, he’d already picked a time and location- all you had to do was show up. And try. He begged you to at least try.  

So you chose a dress that was pretty, but not provocative. You chose a perfume that was adequate, but not alluring. You chose a hairstyle that was stylish, but not seductive. You put in enough effort to be considered effort, and absolutely nothing more than that. You’d rather not waste your best shoes and your best lipstick on him. 

But the moment you walked through the doors of the restaurant that Dazai had so carefully picked out -you were surprised he was capable of putting so much thought into a date, or rather, you were surprised he would do that much for you of all people- it was as if you had in fact put on your best gown, your best makeup, your best perfume, because he was immediately entranced by you.

He cocked a grin. “Domestication never looked so good.”

You had to laugh at that. “I bet you say that to all the women,” You retorted, knowing damn well that his compliment was meant for you and you alone.

He pulled out your chair for you and gestured for you to sit. “Only the ones I want to take home.”

“Ah, yes, but does your home have-” You took your seat, opening up the menu to examine its contents, “-a five star wine selection and, oh, a wide assortment of caviar? If not, then I think we’d better keep this date to the restaurant only. I have expensive tastes, you know.”

He chuckled. “But of course, only the very best for you, my dear. And who knows? Maybe I could have the food catered to our bedside, if you’d let me.”

You shook your head, only half amused. “Getting ahead of ourselves, are we? And here I thought you were supposed to be making me fall in love, not trying to get me naked.” 

He leaned in, resting his head atop his interlocked hands. “By all means, do enlighten me on how I could go about making you fall in love with me. I’m dying to know.”

“You’re the all-knowing detective, you tell me.”

“Ahh, but the all-knowing detective would like to hear from the all-knowing detective’s partner. Tell me. What would make you believe I’m serious about you?”

You almost laughed in sheer disbelief, but the look on his face now was the same one he’d worn just hours ago, when he implored you to give this date a genuine chance. Try. Just try, he’d said. You might find you actually enjoy it. For a moment, the disastrous, delinquent Dazai of the present faded away. For a moment, he was just the Dazai who’d realized that you were homesick when you arrived at the agency and took you out to a small diner that served a meal only made in your hometown’s region. For a moment, he was just the Dazai who got offended on your behalf, when some shady policemen suggested that you could try convincing a criminal to confess by flashing your two assets, so he put on a dress himself, shoving the chest full of toilet paper before asking the cops if they thought he looked pretty enough for the job. For a moment, he was the Dazai you’d almost said yes to. So, for a moment, you mustered up the decency to genuinely ponder his question and provide him with an answer. “You could stand to be more serious, for one. You can’t keep asking me out as a punchline.”

His eyes studied yours intently before replying, “It’s not a punchline. It’s never been a punchline. I’ve always been completely serious about you.” His tone of voice reflected the truth behind his words, but you weren’t sure if you could accept his words as reality just yet. 

“And what about the times you’ve asked me out only to say you’re just kidding shortly after?”

“It’s because I know that’s what you want to hear. And I’m trying to make light of an awkward situation.”

“And the times we’ve been completely engulfed in our work, whether it be poring over papers or chasing down a criminal, and you choose that very moment, as inopportune and inappropriate as it is, to make another confession?”

“You know I can’t help myself sometimes. Not when you look as good as you do solving crimes.”

“And… when you ask out other women, right in front of me? Who am I kidding, it’s probably even when I’m not around to see it. How am I supposed to take you seriously if you’ll bang anything that lives and breathes?”

His lips curled into a grin. “Aww, are you concerned about competition?” He’d known from the very beginning that it displeased you to see him making advances towards other women. He liked that it displeased you. He liked knowing that you felt enough for him to dislike the idea of him being with anyone else. He’d known that it was juvenile of him, and he’d known that it was counterproductive to his goal, but it was the quickest, most obvious way to make you see him, to make you acknowledge him, and like a child, he’d taken the easy way out. After so many failed attempts at securing your affection, you’d started to treat him like a nuisance. Started to rely on your other coworkers more than him. Started to deny his very existence, when all he wanted was to exist for you. So, of course he waited until you were in sight to flirt with a client, and of course he used the same pick up lines that he’d used on you before, just to strike home. He was a genius turned idiot when you were around, and the fact of the matter was that he just couldn’t help himself. He couldn’t.

Not when you were rolling your eyes the way he loved.

Not when you were sighing, exasperated, the way he adored. 

Not when you were so close to him yet so completely far from his reach. 

But you’d asked for an answer and he owed you one.

So he sighed, ego and arrogance deflating, as he spoke up again. “Truth is- I’m an idiot. I wanted you to be jealous. I liked that you were jealous. Because it meant you might’ve felt something for me. That’s all there is to it.”

You processed his words, letting them properly sink in. Then, shaking your head, you gave him a small smile. “You know, for a really smart guy, you can be really stupid sometimes. Actually, a lot of the time-”

He held up a finger in protest, but you raised an eyebrow, your expression saying “Really?” and he made the wise decision to let you continue.

“-But you did get one thing right. I do think I might enjoy this date. So… let’s just start over then. Put this extra baggage to the side. Tell me something about you. Anything.”

All this time, he’d spent as the master of his craft- a genius at lying, at manipulating, at reading lies, at reading manipulation, but all he wanted to do when he looked at you was tell you the truth.

So he’d order wine for you, talk with you over dinner, maybe even split dessert (no- he was definitely getting you dessert after everything he’d put you through) and he’d tell you anything you wanted to know. Hell, he’d tell you everything if you asked. He might tell you everything anyway, even if you didn’t ask. 

Sometimes, he didn’t know who he was when he looked in the mirror; was he an ex Mafia member or would the Mafia never really leave him? Was he a member of the Detective Agency or was he not worthy enough to be one, and had he done any good to deserve it? Or was he the sum of all his past mistakes? If he looked at his reflection closer, was he just someone who failed his friend, someone who never stopped failing his friend in his neverending nightmare? Sometimes, he didn’t know who he was when he looked in the mirror, but when he looked at you, he knew exactly what he was: yours. 

And you’d given him one chance to get this right, so there was no way he was fucking it up now. He’d tell you anything, tell you everything. He’d do anything, do everything. He’d do it all for you. 

And he’d do it all so that maybe, one day, you’d believe him when he finally told you that he loved you.

Taglist: @pixelcafe-network @minasfwoopyponytail @ouiouimochi @inkytypewriter

[yzzaqczec]

Beneath the moons glow

Idea: @sametsyun

Once, there was Y/N, a divine being created by the gods to watch over the moon. She was an angel with a silvery glow, her presence a soft luminescence among the vastness of the cosmos. The moon was her kingdom—silent, serene, and lonely. She spent her days attending wishes of the mortals below them. Their hopes whispered up to her through the night, which sounded all the more silent with them, till she heard their promises of the soul.

Except that one who came often was making her heart beat with something which she could not identify.

Lucifer, that was his name and was a fallen angel driven from Heaven long ago. Every time he would come to her place, that always would carry the promise of more than words: the excitement of seeing what the visitor may bring - small things- a bunch of ducks, flowers in star shape, anything whimsical and sweet. Y/N in turn gave the man her wishes for trivial things, moments of glee, for laughter. Alone no longer was Y/N in the company of her visitor. The days turned to months, and the months grew into years. A quiet affection for each other blossomed.

Their bonding grew in the silent nights that were lit by the moon. Lucifer never asked for anything extravagant, and Y/N would always find herself wanting to provide him with whatever he desired. She had fallen in love with him, although she did not know what to call it. Love? She never dared to ask, but she knew he was of the same thought. He smiled every time he saw her his smile shines brighter than the stars in the sky. She would do anything for him, and so did he seem.

Then one day, Lucifer just stopped coming.

Initially, Y/N thought it was just nothing. "Why haven't you come by? I wait for you each night, when the stars shine bright and the moon protects us both. Was this something I did?" she silently asked the empty moon.

Days became weeks, then weeks turned into months, all without him. She still waited, lonely and clueless. She searched the heavens for him, but he was nowhere to be found. She could not help but wonder whether something had happened, whether she perhaps had done something wrong. "Had I failed him in some way? Did he no longer want me to grant his wishes?" Her heart felt heavy as the cycles of the moon increased, and she began to feel a deep sadness that no star could chase away. The only solace was the fact that one day, he would return, and everything would be okay.

One day, Lucifer showed up. His smile was as broad as ever, but something was different. It did not feel the same. The warmth that once seemed to emanate from his presence was now gone, replaced by an emptiness that cut deeper than she could have imagined.

"Y/N" he greeted, the name slipping from his lips like a familiar song, but with a hollow tone. He handed her a small, delicate gift wrapped in glistening paper, but there was no joy behind his eyes.

Y/N heart skipped, her hopes rising for a moment. "It’s been a long time," she said softly. "I’ve missed you."

Lucifer's eyes flickered briefly, then he quickly covered it with a chuckle. "I've been busy. But I've come to ask for a wish."

Her heart leapt, and she smiled. This was it, she thought. "Maybe this is the moment we return to what we had before. Maybe it'll be like it once was." But his words shattered that fragile hope.

He asked for something that felt wrong, something that was against the very rules she had been bound to since her creation. It was a wish that involved breaking celestial laws. She hesitated. "This. This is too much. I can't grant this, Lucifer." But his eyes, those eyes she had trusted for so long, looked at her with something she couldn't place.

"You think I forgot you? You think I stopped caring? No, Y/N. I couldn't forget you. But the moment I walked away from the moon, I knew I'd lost something I couldn't get back," he said, his voice laced with guilt.

She felt the weight of his words, but despite her doubt, she couldn't refuse him. Her heart—"I would do anything for him,"—knew no better. With trembling hands, she granted the wish, though it was wrong, something that she knew she should not do.

What she did not know was the price with which it came.

Lucifer's trial soon followed, and Y/N was left dazed. She had been summoned to the heavenly court, where the angels looked at her with judgment in their eyes. Lucifer stood at the center of the courtroom, his head lowered in shame. And beside him stood Lilith—the one who had been with him all along, the one he had truly wanted all this time.

Her heart cracked, shards of trust and affection shattering. "You think I wanted to leave you? You think I wanted to stop visiting the moon? No. but I had no choice. Sometimes the price of freedom is heavier than you think," Lucifer had said, but his betrayal stung just the same.

As the angels questioned her, "What had you done, Y/N? What wish did you grant him?" this truth struck her like thunder—she was the one that helped him bring Lilith back.

Lucifer, in a moment of panic, pointed his finger at her. "She did it. It was her who granted me the wish."

The words cut deeper than any betrayal she could have thought of. "So this was it. All that I had given to him, all the love I thought we shared. it was nothing."

Lucifer and Lilith were punished and sent down to Hell to stay there forever. However, Y/N was not shown any mercy; however, the punishment she received was a lighter one. They said she didn't know what the wish would do. Nevertheless, she was sent out of Heaven, a beautiful home lost to her for good. She remained there, on the moon, her heart a heavy aching weight in her chest.

"You were my haven. my escape from everything. I never thought that I would ever bring about such pain in you. I thought that I was capable of handling all of this, but it was just too much," Lucifer's words echoed in her head as she looked out to the vast emptiness that the moon surface seemed to offer.

There was her on the bleak, snow cold desert landscape alone, when before she a green bunny that he'd given her years earlier stirred to life, tears fallen into its little soft frame on whose green jade-eyes sparkle lit after these final tears until she saw not alone again. Small creature nuzzled by it and she found this instant comfort.

“I thought I was doing what was right for myself, for Lilith. But now I realize I’ve lost more than I could ever gain. You were everything I needed. and I let you go,” Lucifer's voice, tinged with regret, haunted her every moment.

Years passed, eons even. The moon, once dark and empty, started changing. Lights shimmered, festivals sprang up, and laughter filled the air. It had become a place for celebration, joy, and fun, but Y/N heart still ached with pain for the love she had lost.

Her search for Lucifer never ended. She tried everything: every spell, every ritual, every prayer. But nothing seemed to work. "If you're out there, Lucifer, do you ever wonder about me? Do you ever miss the moon? Or has the Hell beneath your feet become too heavy?" she whispered, looking to the heavens, but nothing came.

One day, she realized that despite everything, she had never truly stopped loving him. "You’ll always be a part of me, Lucifer. Whether you forgive me or not, you’ll always have a place in my heart. I just wish I could show you that before it was too late."

And so, with lights and laughter still burning all around, Y/N made a promise to find him again. No matter the time it took or how long the distance was; she would find her way back to him.

And perhaps, just maybe, the stars will finally align.

---

Will post the pt2 next week:>

OKAY TOTALLY RUSHED THIS

I did not proofread this so mb if there are some mistakes, I totally added chang'e instead of y/n in some of these😭

Idea from!! @sametsyun

https://www.tumblr.com/sametsyun/742930833875353600/i-have-a-fanfic-idea-alright-you-guys-know-that?source=share

TYSM I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO THINK OF AN IDEA(⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)

[rafeshit]

sweet!rafe x sad!reader

warnings — tw: tiktok ban

summary — tiktok gets banned and rafe comforts reader

youre laying on the couch, mindlessly scrolling through your phone as the sun begins to set through the window of your boyfriends condo. Your fingers scroll through the feed, liking and commenting on posts without registering what they're even about. suddenly, a screen takes over, announcing in bold black letters "TikTok Banned in the USA."

Your heart shatters as you process the news. No, no, no. This can't be happening. You've spent hours crafting your own videos, perfecting your dance moves, and even gaining ten thousand followers by showcasing you and rafes relationship to the public. It's not just an app – it's your life.

before you can even react, your boyfriend Rafe walks into the room, rubbing the sleep from his eyes from a nap he had taken. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asks, noticing the distress on your face.

You hold up your phone, and he takes a seat beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. "Awe dont worry, babe. It's just an app. We'll find something else to do together," he says, brushing your hair softly.

You sigh, already feeling the water works coming. "It's not just an app, Rafe. It's my everything, my friends... my escape." You let out a weak chuckle, trying to hold back the tears. "I know it sounds silly, but it just feels like a part of me is being taken away."

Rafe pulls you closer, “We can find new ways to express ourselves," He pauses, his eyes squinting at the screen. "Who knows? Maybe we'll even start our own YouTube channel."

“No rafe!” you groan, “that means we’ll have to start from scratch”

“that’s fine, it will be a fresh start, maybe it will work out for us?” He assures you.

You toss your phone across the room groaning, “God. Your dad was a trump supporter and honestly for the first time in my life I think we need that guy for once.”

he brushes his hand along your back, “it will be replaced back on your phone once he’s in office baby, I promise everything will work out fine.” he smiles.

you give him a flat smile, and suddenly he lifts you up, scooping you in his arms, “now that you dont have TikTok distracting you all the time maybe we can spend some quality time with eachother!”

you squeal as he runs into the bedroom and tosses you on the bed. “what could we possibly do?” You ask.

“I think I have something in mind.” He smirks.

You furrow your brows, “no, rafe I dont feel like-“

“Not that.” He quickly says, “let’s think about some YouTube channel ideas, we could start off with a Q&A or maybe a gaming video? You know you love COD.”

you smile at that, “or maybe we could do the ‘we listen and we dont judge challenge’, I can learn so much about your dirty secrets i know you have been keeping from me.” You raise an accusatory brow.

“Anything you want baby, im down for it.” He says, collapsing on top of you and tickling you, earning fits or laughter from you. Rafe always knows how to cheer you up and it didn’t seem so bad that TikTok is banned since you could spend more time with your boyfriend.

(this is satire)

[ravencincaide]

Flowers

Summary: In Dazai's mind, there is no such thing as too late. There is always a solution to every problem. You just need to find the right approach. OR Dazai’s bizarre reaction to your claim that its ‘too late’. 

Pairing: Mafia! Osamu Dazai x Fem! Reader  Author Note. This is Part 2 to: If only you'd hold my hand. I'd strongly advise you to read that one first befor reading Flowers. Work count: 2.2  Warning: Dark content including angst, mention of abortion, cursing and toxic relationship. In addition, this part includes light alcohol consumption, light mention of intimacy. You've been warned, And with those words: Enjoy!

"it's too late" your ominous whisper hung heavily in the dark room. Like a shroud, it buried the once happy news, and turned everything you knew- or thought you knew - into a

hollow, dark disappointing mess. And you didn't know where to start picking up the pieces.

Should you start with your shattered heart after having to make the hardest decision of your life? Deal with your disappointment in Dazai from breaking yet another promise to you? Or maybe address the shambles that was your relationship- or about to be. Should you break it off while the wound was still raw and be done with it all? Repeat those cursed words again and then watch how the tender affection you've craved for months was ripped away from you. 

Again.

Dazais lips move from your fingertips to your wrist. Paused at your pulse point where he pressed a kiss, then trailed up your arm until he came across a faint scar. He lingered there as if remembering where it came from, or thinking of ways to make it disappear. As if fixing that little blemish on your skin would somehow erase all the hurt.

You pulled your hand back, cleared your throat and tried to speak again "It's too - "

"-I think we should go on a vacation" Dazai caught your wrist and brought your hand back to his face, completely ignoring that he caught you off guard, your mind struggling to process his words. You were too stunned to speak, too stunned to react as you processed the odd words that left his mouth. He used that moment to pull you to his chest.  "It's been so long since we've had some 'You and me’ time, Pretty” 

You swallowed thickly past the cotton-ball feeling in your throat "I don't think I have the energy to-"

"-Nonsense. I'll get you packed" He had you sit on your bed as he pulled out  our old travel bag from the closet. The one you hadn't used since your last field mission all those years ago. You didn’t even know you still had it, but Dazai knew where to find it straight away. 

Odd? 

A moment passed of him  fighting with the zip and lock combo before the fearsome Mafia executive began packing seemingly random articles of clothing: dresses, shirts, blouses, jeans and t-shirts. His disposition was almost happy as he filled your suitcase to the brim and then opened another compartment, ready to stuff even more things into the overfilled bag. 

You glanced away  as he opened your lingerie drawer, part of you embarrassed at the state of it and another part angry at how comfortable he seemed handling your personal items. As if he owed them. The lacy fancy stuff you used to wear was replaced by worn granny panities for bad days and brand new tighty whities for good. 

He pushed them to the side with several falling to the fall, then humm’ed in approval as though he found a goldmine. “Oh these ones will do. Do you remember them?” Dazai asked, holding up a pair of sheer ones with an obnoxious bow on the butt.

How did he find those? Exactly the ones you wore when you two were last intimate. You were certain you lost them in the laundry. Or maybe tossed them away in a fit of desperate rage. 

You grimaced as he packed them into the bag and then went back to digging in your drawer.

“Lets just go” you muttered as you got off the bed and snatched the almost packed suitcase out of his hands.  You hurried out of the room and back towards the garage you had just come from. You were certain he’d suggest taking the car and it didn’t take you long to find the oddly parked vehicle near the door, all set and ready to head to this ‘so called’ vacation of his. 

But all you wanted was to get away. Run before he could bring up more of those pleasantly unpleasant memories. Because who in their right fucking mind would want to think about the fun sexy times in your condition? Especially knowing those seemingly loving moments would result in your current predicament 

Then again what fucking sane person would go on a lovey dovey vacahan with their Ex right after an abortion?

Wait? 

Is that what you two were now? Exes? Lost love? Another tragic statistic? Could you even be exes in the twisted world of death, abilities and absolute loyalty? Or was this some kind of sick amusement on his part? A twisted game for him and a pat on the back for you for a job ’well done’; a role ‘well played’.  

You were getting angry. Frustrated at the loneliness you endured. Angry at the fact that

you hadn't seen him for days, asked for a single favour from him, begged for a moment of his time, to meet you for lunch and he failed. He fucking failed to show up for you when it counted and you were not going to forgive him for it. 

No, you’d go on this fucking trip under obligations but you’d also show him that you were done, and he could shove his immature-

Flowers?

The backseat of the car had a bouquet of flowers laying on it, your favourite dinner peeked out of a take-away bag and the seat cushion between front and back seat was up and arranged for you to take a nap. As you processed the oddly caring gesture, Dazai caught up with you and took the packed bag out of your hands before putting it in the trunk. Himself.

"No goons with?" 

"Nope "He said it as if he's gone anywhere without half a dozen mafia on his ass in the last half a year. “Only you and me for a change, donna"

A flicker of concern passed over you. Your one eyed bandit driving? Did he even remember

how to do that after all the time he spent stuck behind a desk?

You were about to protest, to offer yourself up to be behind the wheel but the words caught in your throat, choked by the anger, sadress, betrayal and that gut punching act he put on, as if everything was okay- that it would be okay. No, he wanted this vacation, he failed you, so he could Ideal being behind the uncomfortable wheel for hours on end, navigating the roads while you gave him the Silent Treatment. Then maybe, just maybe, he’d begin to finally understand a fraction of the emotion you felt, that you dealt with. Because of him. 

Flowers. 

Fucking flowers made you made you cave enough to move from the backsea to shotgun a day later. Weary eyes watched the blur of the passing landscape, lingering on famous places Dazai pointed out before you’d stubbornly looked away again. Still silent, safe for your body language which was an open book for him.

That was enough for him. Daizai  kept pointing out a place or two:  an offer to stop for dinner, a gasbreak, a cultural sight or a place where a gruesome murder took place and read your body language for an answer. And through it all, at almost every stop, he got you flowers. Long, Short, tall, cheap, pricey, eternal and real. It wasn’t long before the backseat looked like a miniature garden with yet  another addition to the ever growing collection in your lap- a bunch of local lilies of various shades of white or red.

Beside you, Dazai was focused on the road, the traffic moderate enough that he could tear his attention away every few moments for a kiss. Kiss the places where your hands interlocked, on your knuckles and occasionally your lips or your neck. 

Loving. Almost playful.

This was the Dazai you knew- the man you fell in love with. You could see him so clearly now, without the mafia coat and executive responsibilities. Just a man who grew up too quickly, behind the wheel of the car that was too big and just right at the same time. Just him and you and the endless road that swallowed up the unspoken words; gobbled up bitter emotion until a mournful numbness settled in.

On day 3, you both checked into a hotel for the night- your last night in Japan before your flight, and you finally broke through the last of the unspoken resentment. Tears welled up in your eyes as you saw the dress Dazai prepared for you to wear to dinner. The fabric hidden inside the fancy protective bag, by the closet with only the tags peeking out. A bottle of champagne and strawberries stood by the grand bed, right beside a hand written welcome card. 

It was perfect, full of luxuries you weren’t accustomed to, full of affection and thought and grand gestures you never experienced before. 

Perfectly and overbearingly sweet. 

Anything anyone could have wanted- and more. And it was too much. Tears turned to sobs as you clung to Dazai in the doorway. Apologies spilled past your lips, a constant mantra of ‘I’m sorry’s’ The past three days had been a reminder of simpler times. A reminder of the why and how you and Dazai got together, the sacrifices you made for each other. Promises that were forgotten along the way; moments taken for granted. You were hit with the realization of everything you had, and everything you likely lost. You risked years together, poured it down the drain because of a missed lunch. 

A decision set in pain and anger which ended up causing you more pain. 

Oh if only you’d have known that getting away from the Mafia was what he needed. What you both needed. Then maybe, just maybe things would have turned out differently. “Can we try again?” it was a question you asked without a second thought. It seemed right in that moment, appropriate.  

"We can," Dazai muttered, as he pulled back long enough to cup your cheeks. "Just promise me you'll never rush big decisions without talking to me first. Even if it’s about your body."

“I promise" the promise rolled off your lips like a second breath. 

Dazai’s face split into a smile, a satisfied and pleased expression. "Good, now then, we have a dinner reservation to attend to, why don’t you go and get ready?” 

The offer was both exciting and exhausting. The moment was cut short by the planned dinner. It was a little disappointing to you but you were also used to it, adjusting your wants and needs to the clock. Almost in a trance you showered and got yourself changed and ready for a proper evening dinner like in those stupid rom com movies. 

You were done just as it was time to head down. Admittedly you couldn't say you felt okey, beautiful or back to normal. But you could say you felt thought of and loved with every little gesture from his side: pulled out chair, the pink-purple almost wild-looking flowers on the table, a glass of red wine in your hand. The feeling was only reinforced as Dazai leaned closer to you for a rare vacation picture. 

You both, together, in one shot, without you needing to beg. 

It was surreal. 

Selfishly, you set your mind to focus on the good happenings in your present. The stuff that gave you hope for a brighter future. To change your trail of thought from the bad to the good, and the first step would be to view this time away from the mafia as a blessing rather than an obligation.

 “By the way, you never said where we're going” You mused as the waiter removed the appetisers and refilled both your glasses before the main course. " I guess it’s somewhere in Europe, right? Those are the only planes that leave so early tomorrow, right?"

Dazai looked amused at your observation skills, then pleased. "It is, and it's a good opportunity to take a break from the Mafia," Dazai mused, his head resting on his hand, one eye fixated on you and your every expression. 

You pouted at his none-answer.

"Aww c’mon can you at least tell me where it is?” You batted your eyelashes at him as if such simple flirting techniques would ever work on a man like him. Though it was more a running joke between you from your earlier days than an actual attempt at seduction.

To your surprise, he answered. “ It's an obscure little place in Europe " Dazai took a sip of wine, let the taste linger on his tongue, with the tiniest of smiles on his lips. It was like he enjoyed making you wait, torturing your excited self with patience. " It’s called Meursault” 

" Meursault?  It sounds french" You observed. Instantly your mind filled with thoughts of  wine gardens, salt, water and the sea and calm countryside, and your face split into the biggest grin possible. "Must be pretty calm and serene; I look forward to seeing it"

“I’m sure it will feel just like home” … 

Author Note: I'm well aware this chapter left more questions than answers, so I'd like to hear what you guys think. What caught your attention? What did you react to? Did something seem odd and uncharacteristic for Dazai- and if so, why do you think he behaves this way? And most importantly, why Mersault?

And on a final note: I hope you enjoyed!

𝕄𝕒𝕚𝕟 |ℝ𝕒𝕧𝕖𝕟 |ℝ𝕦𝕝𝕖𝕤 |ℝ𝕖𝕢𝕦𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕤 |𝕄𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥 |ℂ𝕣𝕖𝕕 & 𝕆𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣

All fics are unique works by ©raven-cincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reworked/reposted/copied anywhere, please inform me!

[ophanum]

' MISS CONNECTIONS ! - Niragi Suguru

ft. sub yandere! Niragi Suguru x f! insecure! reader

synopsis : You have seen him talking with another girl, so unsuspected and he's so chill with her. You saw this scenario not only once but twice. Now he's banging on your door.

tags & tw/cw: Slight OOC, angst.

❝A rib cage breaks in many ways... I'm told the best way to do it is take the heart out, is take the heart out...❞ — Miss Connections by The Keystones

It was her.

"Bunny," he called out, a name that used to send shivers down your spine, now dripping with a sickening sweetness.

The crowd blurred, a sea of faces except for one. There he was, the black hair a beacon. But it wasn't him that stole the air from your lungs.

His smile, the one that used to be yours, was plastered on her face too. It felt like a theft, a violation. As her smile mirrored his, a crack formed in your heart, widening with each passing second. The warmth you'd built around your emotions crumbled, replaced by a hollowness that echoed in your chest.

Tears pricked your eyes, blurring the scene further. You wished, with a desperation you hadn't felt in years, that he could see the wreckage he'd caused. The love you'd poured into him, now a shattered reflection staring back.

A ghost of a smile played on your lips, a bitter parody of amusement. You didn't need to stay here, a spectator in your own heartbreak. With a final, resolute turn, you walked away, leaving the shattered pieces behind.

"Hey babe," he chirped, pushing open the door. His adoring gaze swept the room before landing on you. Your back was turned, but he didn't miss the way you stiffened at his arrival. His grin, wide and boyish, seemed at odds with the way he swayed towards you, arms outstretched. Despite it, they landed softly on your hips, pulling you closer.

You remained unresponsive, a statue in his embrace.

"Just wait," he murmured, nuzzling his chin against your shoulder and squeezing tighter. "There's another game we can play, right? You and me? What do you say?"

"Sure," you replied, your voice flat. "I'll play."

Niragi, usually oblivious, caught the undercurrent in your tone. Maybe it wasn't your best day. He forced a smile, trying to inject some lightness into the air, even if it clashed with his usual bravado.

"Perfect! How about we head to my room?"

Silence stretched, thick and heavy. Finally, you spoke.

"No. Actually, I don't think I'm in the mood."

His eyebrows shot up. "Hey, what's wrong?"

A humorless chuckle escaped your lips. It sputtered out before fully forming, like a deflated balloon. Though you remained, the lightness had vanished from your laughter.

"Just not feeling it, Niragi," you sighed. "Honestly, sleep sounds amazing right now."

The clink of metal echoed as you dropped your utensils, the clatter a stark contrast to the quiet simmering on the stove. You turned and walked away, leaving Niragi rooted to the spot, his hand reaching out as if to grab your arm, then retracting just as quickly.

"Okay then," he mumbled as you reached the doorway. "Sweet dreams, babe."

The door shut with a soft click, your reply lost in the silence.

That's how things had been. Maybe a little childish, you thought. But the tone of his voice, laced with a vulnerability that resurfaces ever since you two admit each to one's feelings, sent your mind spiraling. A flicker, a spark – not broken, but…dented.

Liar. The word echoed in the empty space where your laughter once resided.

You love him more than you can handle. It's a suffocating weight, this affection, a burden your heart wasn't built to carry.

Love, in its purest form, terrifies you.

A tear welled at the corner of your eye, threatening to spill. But not this time. No, please, not today. Not when you're already teetering on the edge. Sleep, blessed sleep, became your only solace, a refuge from the storm brewing within.

Then came the next day. And with it, the sight that ripped the fragile peace you'd cobbled together. There he was, again, with her.

Why? What twisted game was this?

Jealousy, ever the venomous serpent, coiled itself around you, its icy grip climbing from your toes to your very core. It squeezed, injecting its poison into your veins, turning your thoughts to ash. Your fingers clenched, knuckles white. The world blurred with a haze of hurt and anger.

But then, a flicker of something else. A ghost of a smile played on your lips, your eyes drooping half-closed. The raw shock morphed into a mask of weary acceptance.

"Maybe..." you whispered, voice barely audible, "maybe they are better suited..." You squeezed your eyes shut, a strangled sob catching in your throat. "I can't compete with that..."

Defeated, you turned to leave, each step heavy with the weight of unspoken hurt. But just as you were about to slip back into the shadows, a hand clamped down on your arm, halting your retreat.

"What were you mumbling about, babe?" Niragi asked, his voice laced with concern.

You turned your head slowly, meeting his gaze with a wary caution. A flicker of movement behind him caught your eye – the woman he'd been with, now engrossed in conversation with someone else. His eyes, however, held a different story, a story you could almost decipher from the worry etched within them. He must've caught a word or two of your whispered defeat.

A smile, fragile and uncertain, touched your lips. In those depths you saw reflected the memories you shared, the very foundation of your love for him. And you knew, with a pang of truth, that his love for you brimmed over, a constant overflowing cup. Yet, even a cup overflowing with red wine can be refilled. He was the one who'd take his last breath for you, you knew that.

So why this sudden doubt, this crippling fear? Because love, you understood with a bitter clarity, was a fickle thing. And you, you were weak. You couldn't hold out forever, no matter how much it tore you apart.

Even for him?

But wasn't this for him, too? This agonizing self-preservation? A selfish act, a mantra echoing in your head – selfish, selfish, selfish. But what other choice did you have? Did you..?

"Are you okay?" Niragi's voice, laced with genuine concern, snapped you back to the present. You looked at him, the weight of your unspoken turmoil a heavy burden in your chest.

Your eyes snapped open, the daze momentarily forgotten. You forced a closed-eye smile, hoping it masked the turmoil within.

"Hey! Didn't see you there. What's up?"

Niragi wasn't fooled. Something was terribly wrong. "Y/n," he pressed, his voice firm. "Talk to me. There's something bothering you..."

You let out a shaky breath, a sliver of your exhaustion finally reaching the surface. Your eyelids fluttered shut, revealing the dark circles beneath. "Just...tired, Niragi. All these games are catching up, I guess."

You started to walk away, seeking solace in the quiet corners of the room. But Niragi's hand clamped onto your arm before you could disappear.

"Let me help," he pleaded. "Babe, I hate seeing you like this. I want to fix it."

A sigh escaped your lips, heavy with unspoken words. "Maybe later, Niragi. I just need some space."

You retreated once more, leaving him standing there with a furrow in his brow.

How many times? How many walls had you built, only to have him break them down with his unwavering concern? It had happened just yesterday, hadn't it? And the week before that? A month?

Now here he was, practically begging on the doorstep. Knees scraping against the floor, knuckles rapping a frantic rhythm against the wood.

"Y/n, please..." his voice choked with emotion. "Tell me what I did wrong. Tell me, so I can hold you again. I just want things to go back to how they were..."

An hour had passed, measured by the deepening purple of his knees and the puffy red of his eyes. Yet, he persisted. You, in a way, had molded him into this new Niragi. A man in control, seeking validation through love, not violence. Rid of the bloodlust, the madness, the insecurity. You'd sculpted him into something better.

Perhaps that's why he hadn't just barged in yet. But the raw desperation in his voice hinted at the calamity simmering just beneath the surface, barely contained.

The weight of his debt was heavy – his life, his future, all tethered to her. But if this was the end, then so be it. He'd unleash the monster he kept caged, just to keep her by his side.

Yet, a question gnawed at him, a relentless echo in his mind. Why? Why was this happening?

Just then, the click of the lock sent a jolt of hope through him. He lifted his chin, a desperate plea mirrored in his puppy-dog eyes that twisted something in your gut. He sank to the floor, clinging to your leg.

"Please," he rasped, the word a desperate plea through hiccups. "Please, just tell me what's wrong..."

"Come inside, Niragi," you sighed, leading him into the room.

You settled on the bed, the air thick with unspoken tension. Niragi remained standing, a storm brewing in his unstable gaze. He craved answers, and he craved them now, even if it meant forcing them from your clenched fists. Even if it meant laying waste to everyone around him for your sake.

"So?" he finally barked, his voice tight.

Silence stretched between you, your eyes refusing to meet his. He searched your face, desperate for any explanation.

A groan escaped your lips as you buried your face in your hands. "It's me, Niragi," you confessed, a wave of misery washing over you. "I'm not strong enough for this."

"No, you're not weak!" His laugh, a harsh, hollow sound, sent shivers down your spine. Unhinged, desperate, teetering on the edge. "You're the strongest person I know, stronger than me even!"

"That's not what I meant," you clarified, your voice barely a whisper.

His gaze locked onto yours, a frantic plea replacing the desperation. Like a cracked glass, he seemed to hold onto the last vestiges of control, preventing the torrent of emotions from spilling over.

"I don't think I can do this anymore," you whispered, the words heavy with defeat.

"What?" The single word broke free, laced with disbelief.

"Find someone else, Niragi," you choked out, tears stinging your eyes. "I don't deserve you."

A tremor ran through him, a crack splitting wide within. The dam holding back the monster was on the verge of breaking.

"Wait!" he cried, scrambling to his knees before you. He cupped your face in his trembling hands, his grip gentle yet firm. "Why? What happened? I...I don't understand! Y/N, please, please, tell me..."

The dam within you finally broke. Your lips quivered, and a tremor ran through your body as the raw vulnerability of his touch cracked the carefully constructed facade. Tears streamed down your cheeks, your hands limp in his grasp.

"I...I got jealous," you confessed, the words choked out on a sob.

Niragi, overwhelmed with his own emotional turmoil, could only listen intently, his hold tightening slightly with every shaky word you spoke.

"I know you didn't mean anything by it," you continued, voice thick with despair, "but it hurt so much, Niragi. So, so much. I felt like I couldn't take it anymore. I'm such a terrible girlfriend..."

"No! It was me!" he roared, desperate to absolve you of any blame. "There's nothing to apologize for! I'm the one who glanced over, like an idiot! It wasn't anything, I swear! I'm so sorry, Y/n, so sorry! I'll never do it again, I promise! You're the only one I see, my love, the only one I'LL EVER SEE!"

You shook your head, the memory of that single glance, a mere hairline crack in your relationship, amplifying into a gaping chasm in your own mind. This was your weakness, your flaw, laid bare.

After the torrent of emotions, an exhausted silence descended. You took a shuddering breath, a tired smile flickering on your lips.

"No, Niragi," you said softly, your voice drained. "Don't you see? Can't you see how weak I am? How flawed?"

"No, they're not flaws! They're not!" he cried, his voice thick with choked sobs as he cupped your cheeks. "They're not... how can I make you understand that?"

You shook your head again, the movement barely there. "There's no need to explain anymore, Niragi. I won't listen. It's...irritating, isn't it?" you whispered, your voice barely audible over his sobs and the muffled thumps of his fist hitting the bed beside your leg. "I'm not trying to blame you...it's just the way things are. Can't we accept it? Fate practically screaming at us. Let's not try to ruin it all."

"I DON'T CARE ABOUT FATE!" he roared, his voice raw with desperation. "I don't care about anything at all! I ONLY WANT YOU, Y/N! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST GIVE YOURSELF TO ME?"

His words hung heavy in the air, a desperate plea laced with a terrifying undercurrent. He was at the end of his rope, teetering on the edge, willing to become the monster he held at bay, all for a chance to keep you.

At this point, his hair stuck to his face in damp strands. His sobs had slowed to ragged hitches, his eyes red and puffy. He hiccuped, clinging to you like a lost child. And amidst the wreckage, your heart, if it even existed anymore, shattered into a million pieces.

You'd questioned its existence for a while now. Was there even a flicker of sympathy left within you, for him or yourself? You'd cried yourself dry days ago, the tears a testament to your own pathetic state.

"I don't know how to fix this, Niragi," you whispered, the words a hollow echo in the room. "I wish I did."

"I would never," he hiccuped, wiping his face with a wet sleeve. He slumped down, laying his cheek on your lap like a defeated puppy. "I would never do it again, Y/n. Put me on a leash, tie me to a chair, lock me in a dungeon with starving dogs – losing you would be the death of me."

His voice dropped to a near whisper, his eyes losing their spark. "Don't...don't make me a grave."

Your lips quivered. Maybe you were the monster. Not the monstrous being Niragi conjured in his mind, but perhaps the architect of this pain. Maybe you were the one inflicting the hurt. And the thought of it repeating… you tilted your head down. It would repeat, wouldn't it?

"Niragi, it hurts so much," you choked out, the words thick with despair. "Why does it have to be this way?"

"Y-You're asking me?" he offered, a ghost of a smile flickering through his hiccups, only to melt back into a frown.

You cupped his chin, forcing him to meet your gaze. "Cuddle with me?"

2.4k words...

[ashwhowrites]

Prompt angst 1 with Robin where reader hangs out less and less with Robin and when confronted it’s because she likes her but can’t compete with Vickie

What’s the point of trying if it just proves that I’ll never be good enough?

I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

I hate her

Y/N tried her best to not fall for Robin's pretty face and clumsy personality. They were meant to be friends and nothing more, but Robin made her heart race and palms sweaty. But it didn't matter how Robin made her feel, she wasn't the one Robin wanted.

Robin had a crush on Vickie for over three months and it was silently killing Y/N. She was a good friend so she listened to Robin declare her love for Vickie all day every day. Maybe it wouldn't have hurt so bad if she was honest about how she felt. There was a time before Vickie, when Robin and Y/N were dancing over the friend line. A slight tease of what could be and Y/N basked in it until the light went out.

Now it was all Vickie. Robin didn't even spare a second glance at Y/N anymore. Vickie seemed to offer something better and Y/N couldn't help but feel replaced. She felt as if her efforts weren't good enough and it stung. Whatever Robin wanted from Vickie, Y/N could easily do. She felt like a kid begging for attention, doing anything to get Robin to look her way.

Y/N felt tired of trying. She was tired of how upset she felt whenever Robin turned to Vickie instead. Y/N was the original but Robin didn't seem to care. Y/N knew she deserved someone better and someone who made her feel first.

She began to spend less time with Robin, letting her heart heal. She didn't want their friendship to end but she needed space. At first, it seemed like Robin didn't notice and that made Y/N feel even worse. It hurt to see Robin focus all her attention on someone that wasn't her. The jealousy wasn't firey, it was more cold. She wasn't jealous in the way she wanted to show Vickie who Robin belonged to, it was the painful jealousy that kept her up at night and made her think less of herself.

As the days passed, Y/N barely saw Robin. Which is what she wanted but it proved that she only saw Robin when she initiated it. Robin didn't bother to make time to see her, which made her think the friendship might not be worth saving.

~~~

Robin swallowed her tears as she saw Vickie press her lips against a guy. They seemed familiar with each other, almost like they were a couple. Robin had this hope that Vickie was gay but she was wrong.

Steve placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, knowing how crushing the moment was for Robin. But Robin shoved his hand off and ran out of the store. She allowed herself to cry once she made it outside, the reality that she and Vickie would never be settling in.

~

Y/N was surprised to see Robin at her door but welcomed her in.

"What are you doing here?" Y/N asked, and her question sent Robin into a breakdown. Robin sobbed, making Y/N's heartbreak. She quickly wrapped her arms around her, trying to calm her down. "What's wrong?"

Robin pulled away to collect herself, wiping off her face. "Vickie has a boyfriend," she said in between tears. Y/N fought back the want to roll her eyes. She was unsuccessful in holding back her scoff though, easily catching Robin's attention.

"What?"

"I haven't seen you in days and you finally come but it's because you want comfort because of Vickie!" Y/N exclaimed, annoyance clear in her voice.

"I need my friend! Which you haven't been for the past few days," Robin bit back, her blue eyes squinting into a glare. Y/N laughed humorlessly, she crossed her arms and created more space between them.

"And yet you never cared enough to ask so seems like we are both shitty friends," Y/N snapped, a sharp smile on her face.

"What is your problem? What's with the sudden cold shoulder?" Robin asked she wanted her friend but she couldn't find her. "All I wanted was some comfort after my heart was shattered and you don't seem to give a shit."

"Because I don't, Robin!" Y/N snapped, her voice slightly rising. "I don't care about Vickie and I don't care about your love for her. I never cared and I never will. I hate Vickie. I hate the way she makes me feel and I hate how much you feel for her."

"What is that supposed to mean? How can you hate her when you've never had a conversation with her?"

"It doesn't matter," Y/N shrugged. "Maybe you should go."

But Robin stayed put. "No, we are going to talk. You are done avoiding me. I don't know what your problem is with Vickie but she doesn't deserve your cold treatment."

"What’s the point of trying if it just proves that I’ll never be good enough?. What is the point of telling you how much I'm in love with you when you'll never look my way? My problem with her is that you love her, Robin. And you don't love me." Y/N admitted, tears falling down her face as she looked at the floor.

Robin was stunned. She never once thought her best friend was in love with her. Hell, she didn't even know she was into girls. Robin swallowed her spit as she felt her throat get dry.

"I-um-I" Robin stuttered, truly at a loss for words. "I don't know what to say. I'm sorry."

Y/N bit down on the inside of her cheek, trying to keep more sobs back. "Can you just tell me if there's a chance for us?"

Robin looked into her wet eyes, watching the tears disappear down her chin. She watched as Y/N chewed on her cheek, trying to stand strong but it was clear to tell she was falling apart.

"No," Robin whispered, her heart aching as Y/N turned away from her. She reached out but Y/N flinched away.

"Please leave"

"Y/N, can we please talk through this," Robin pleaded. She didn't want to lose a friend. Y/N shook her head, still not turning around as a few cries left her mouth.

"No, Robin. No amount of talking will make this work. I can't be your friend, it's too hard," she sobbed.

"So that's it? We just walk away and never talk again? That's not fair!" Robin fought.

Y/N turned around a defeated look on her face. "I don't care. I need to be done."

Robin scoffed, she couldn't believe Y/N was going to throw away their friendship over something Robin couldn't control. Y/N was determined, and she wasn't going to change her mind.

"Fine, have a nice life," Robin spat as she walked out the door. Y/N closed her eyes as the door slammed, the sound ringing in her ears.

She took a deep breath and opened her eyes. It was going to be hell getting over her but it was possible. And she knew she'd be okay in the end.

[koiiiji]

Heey I loved the joker nsfw scenario you write so goood can I request sth very fluffy for example how each day with him goes, where he takes us on dates and so on?🩷 also you could maybe include some angsty scenarios where we want to watch him at a fight night but he doesn’t want us to see the cruel world he lives in bcs hes so protective and etc

suuure hun!!! sorry that it took me too long to answer, have no idea why ur request displayed in my app only after 6 days so i started to work on it late.

hope you will like it! enjoy🤓🤍

xo-xo💋

｡‧˚ʚ°ɞ˚‧｡ ───

mere mention of apples brought a fond smile to your lips, thinking of Joker's peculiar fondness for everything apple-related. from his shampoo to his gum, his love for the crisp fruit permeated every aspect of his life. you even gift him home fragrance with apple taste. and especially joker liked sweets with apples, all kind of pies, muffins, ice creams and etc, everything with apples. and when you stumbled upon the viral tiktok video featuring the famed apple croissant, you knew it was the perfect choice for your date. you immediately sent a link of that café to Joker. no need to say that date idea was approved in a second.

as you rode the metro toward the new cafe, anticipation for your date with Joker bubbled within you. dressed in your best outfit and with your makeup flawlessly applied, you were ready to make this a day unforgettable, preferably without any distractions from his “colleagues.” or so you thought.

but just as you were lost in thoughts of sugary delights and stolen moments with Joker, a notification from him shattered your reverie. Your smile faltered as you read his message, the words weighing heavily on your heart. “sorry, im in the bar, Wooin said it emergency. don’t wait for me, maybe ask your friends and have fun. i’ll be late. sorry.”

with a sigh, you decided to continue the date alone, and buy that damn apple croissants, unwilling to let Wooin's interference ruin at least your evening. the idea of waiting for your girls seemed futile, knowing they likely had their own plans for evening.

when you entered the cafe, when you were paying for your croissant, you still couldn’t get rid of unpleasant idea. you knew Joker hated it when you stepped into his “work life” and saw him fighting in the actagon. but since Wooin decided to take him away from you so brazenly, you thought that there would be nothing wrong with you grabbing him after this stupid match, and taking a take out bag of croissants with you, you headed to that ill-fated bar.

｡‧˚ʚ°ɞ˚‧｡ ───

as you walked into the dimly lit bar, the contrast to -at least expected- date was stark. the once vibrant excitement for sharing apple croissant after that damn match had faded, replaced by a sense of disappointment and frustration. the air hung heavy with the stench of alcohol, mingling with the faint undertones of stale sweat and spilled drinks. each step you took seemed to echo against the grimy floor, the stickiness clinging to the soles of your shoes, a tangible reminder of the less-than-inviting atmosphere.

despite your reluctance, you made your way through the crowded space, weaving through intoxicated patrons who stumbled and swayed in a haphazard dance of inebriation. the cacophony of voices, laughter, and clinking glasses assaulted your senses, drowning out any semblance of peace or tranquility.

as you approached the bar, your eyes scanned the dimly lit room, searching for the familiar figure of Joker amidst the chaotic scene. and then, like a sudden chill down your spine, you felt the unwelcome presence of an arm slung over your shoulder.

"hi there, little thing," came Wooin's voice, dripping with an unsettling mixture of familiarity and condescension. words sent a shiver down your spine, his presence a stark reminder of the intrusion upon your plans and the disruption of your evening.

despite the façade of casualness in his tone, there was an underlying tension, silent dislike, Wooin never liked your presence, Joker was distracted, which means he did his job badly. you resisted the urge to shrug off his arm, instead steeling yourself with a forced smile, masking the turmoil brewing beneath the surface.

in that moment, surrounded by the oppressive atmosphere of the bar and the unwelcome company of Wooin, you couldn't help but feel a sense of betrayal, both by Joker's absence and by the intrusion of his colleague into your plans. it was a bitter reminder of the complexities of relationships, the delicate balance between loyalty and disappointment. and then your heart sank. the crowd roared, drawing attention to the center of the bar. to the octagon. people seemed to be chanting someone's name, and it clearly wasn't Joker’s. Even though Joker protected you from this world and did not allow you to appear at his fights, you knew he never lost, so why was the crowd rooting for someone else today? these and other thoughts were constantly running through your head.

as you watched in disbelief, Wooin approached you with a sly grin, his words cutting through the chaos of the bar like a knife. "you see, darling," he began, his voice dripping with malice, "Joker's task tonight is not to win, but to fall." the revelation hit you like a sucker punch to the gut, leaving you reeling with shock and betrayal.

as the fight in the octagon reached its climax, you stood frozen in the midst of the raucous crowd, your heart pounding with a mixture of fear and disbelief. you couldn't tear your eyes away from Joker, his form battered and bruised. Wooin's words echoed in your mind, Joker's gaze found yours across the sea of spectators. In that moment of connection, you saw the pain etched in his eyes, a silent plea for understanding and forgiveness.

as the final blow landed, and Joker stumbled to the ground, you felt a surge of anguish wash over you. it was a bitter pill to swallow, knowing that his fall had been orchestrated not by his opponent's strength, but by the cold calculations of those who saw him as nothing more than a pawn in their game.

｡‧˚ʚ°ɞ˚‧｡ ───

in the quiet solitude of the changing rooms, you found Joker sitting alone, his hands trembling as he attempted to patch up his wounds. without a word, you approached him, your hands reaching out to gently grasp his own.

in that moment of shared vulnerability, the weight of the world seemed to lift from your shoulders, replaced by a sense of clarity and resolve. and as Wooin's departing footsteps echoed in the distance, leaving you alone with Joker, you knew that this was your chance to confront the truth that lay between you.

with a trembling voice, you said “you know that you always can stop doing.. this..” after thinking a little, you added "and start with something new..." you looked around the small room, meaning all his work in general, "well, less violent". Joker just smiled at you and with a trembling hand reached for the bag that you had brought with you, his fingers brushing against the delicate pastry nestled within. with a bittersweet smile, he took a bite of the apple croissant, savoring the taste of sweetness and redemption that lingered on his lips.

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[shadowdaddies]

Hello! Could i request a cassian x f!reader fic where the reader is a babysitter for cassian's baby girl (maybe less than a year old). cassian is a single father...you can choose whatever happened to the baby's mom. so maybe as time goes on and cassian sees reader bonding so well with his baby, he starts liking her more and more. eventually asks her out and they end up getting together and all❤️

hi! love this, thank you for the request💜

A/N: I'm still traveling for the holidays but trying to get through my requests, thanks to everyone who has been patient sending them in💜💜💜

Aella

Cassian x Reader fluff

The Lord of Bloodshed looked close to tears as his baby girl continued to cry in his arms. With desperate eyes, Cassian looked to you, an understanding smile gracing your lips as you took Aella from his hold. 

Holding her head against your chest, you swayed your hips back and forth as the toddler calmed at the movement and the sound of your heartbeat. 

Cassian released a relieved breath, granting you a broad smile of gratitude as he watched his daughter drift to sleep in your arms. “You are a life saver, as always,” he breathed, running a calloused hand through his long black hair. 

Shaking your head, you placed a soft kiss to the girl’s hair. “It’s my pleasure, truly. She is such a sweet girl.”

After a long gaze that had you blushing furiously, Cassian glanced between you and the doorway, rocking back and forth on his heels. “I shouldn’t be gone too long - I have a meeting with the camp leaders up in Illyria but Rhysand will bring me back tonight.”

Rubbing your hand on Aella’s back, you shook your head at him. “Don’t feel rushed. We’ll be just fine here, won’t we?” you reassured him. 

Wild black curls popped up against your cheek as Aella perked up. “Momma,” she cooed, big brown eyes looking at you adoringly.

Your jaw dropped, cheeks turning beet red as you looked to Cassian. “She’s never called me that, I didn’t teach her...” you fumbled for words.

Cassian’s eyes watered, the male stumbling backwards as the breath flew from his lungs. He clutched his chest as he stared at you in shock, at a loss for words himself. 

The moment was interrupted the the High Lord winnowing in, his hand taking Cassian’s arm as he asked if the general was ready to go. Numbly, Cassian nodded, allowing himself to be swept into darkness as you stared helplessly at the spot where he had stood a moment ago.

Aella giggled in your arms, drawing you back to the present. “Let’s go make dinner, sweet girl,” you murmured. 

The night passed in a blur, your usual routine with Aella plagued by the dread that filled you at the thought of Cassian’s return. The fragile relationship that you had built with the handsome male was shattered the moment his daughter called you ‘momma.’ 

As much as you loved Aella and Cassian, you would never try to replace Aella’s mother. The thought of the young girl thinking of you as such made your gut churn with guilt, and Cassian’s face at the comment made tears spring to your eyes. It was as though he was struck by lightning, the way he jumped away from you.

With a sigh, you put Aella to bed, heading downstairs where you waited on the couch for Cassian’s return. After some time of stewing with your thoughts, the general returned, Rhys giving you a polite greeting as a rare smile graced his lips before he vanished into a swirling darkness once more.

Biting your lip, you dared a glance at Cassian, the Illyrian male appearing just as nervous as you felt. 

“I’m sorry-“

“I apolog-“ 

With a nervous chuckle, Cassian took a seat on the coffee table in front of you, a strange look in his eyes as he deliberated what to say next. With a deep breath, he found composure before speaking. “I apologize for how I left earlier. It was a lot to process, hearing Aella call you... that.” 

His eyes shone with sadness as he failed to say the word, and you instinctively reached a hand to hold his in comfort. Eyes widening, you realized the potential mistake of your movement, but before you could pull your hand away, Cassian gently brought it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to your knuckles.

He held your hand firmly in his lap, and you savored the warmth of his strong, calloused hands holding yours. “There is more,” he whispered, sparing you a nervous glance before hazel eyes returned to your hand in his lap.

Something of interest sparked in your chest at his admission as you shifted slightly forward. “What is it, Cassian?” you whispered, rubbing your thumb against the back of his hand as you tried to quiet the thunderous beating of your heart.

Cassian didn’t have to say anything. When he looked up at you, long black hair falling out of his eyes, the thread snapped as if your soul leapt from your chest towards his own. With a nod and a knowing smile, Cassian managed out a few words. “The bond snapped.”

Bringing your free hand to wipe the tear that fell down his cheek, you cupped Cassian’s face in a bold move as you guided his gaze to yours. “I feel it too. But this does not need to be anything that you do not want it to be, Cassian. I know how difficult this is, with Aella, and I am not ever going to replace her mother. I love her - and you - too much to dream of it.”

The world tilted on its axis as Cassian’s hand gripped the back of your neck, pulling you into a kiss with a heat unlike which you’d ever felt before. Forehead pressed to yours, Cassian smiled, a brilliant thing that had your heart thumping once more. “I love you, and I can’t believe I am lucky enough to have you as a mate. I spoke to Rhys and he gave great insight. I want... no, I need you in my life, and in Aella’s.”

A soft giggle escaped you, joy overflowing as you kissed him again. “We will work through this then, together. We go slow, talk to Aella... We have forever, after all.”

[fafnir19]

Interns should (not) act like a dick

Ben clenched his jaw as he entered the bustling office, avoiding Robert's icy stare. He despised his internship under Robert's wing, enduring the daily grind of tedious tasks and snide remarks. But today, the weight of a troubling discovery left his stomach churning. "Morning, Ben," Robert's voice sliced through the air, dripping with condescension.

"Morning," Ben muttered, keeping his gaze fixed on his computer. He had to focus on his plan; there was too much at stake. As the day wore on, Ben carefully gathered irrefutable evidence of Robert’s embezzlement. He witnessed Robert covertly funneling company funds into his pet hush-hush science project. Ben’s fingers trembled as he composed an email to the company's board, attaching compelling proof of Robert’s misdeeds. Before the clock struck 5 p.m., Ben slipped out of the office, heart pounding with apprehension and determination.

He braved the biting wind outside, hastening to the safety of his home. But the next morning, a foreboding air settled over the office as Ben noticed hushed conversations and furtive glances directed at him. "Robert," Ben ventured when their paths crossed in the break room, "have you heard anything unusual lately?" Robert flashed a tight-lipped smile. "Why? Got something to tell me, intern?" Ben narrowed his eyes, but he bit back the retort that poised on his tongue. He had to be patient, biding his time until the board's response arrived. Days turned into weeks as Ben labored under the weight of his secret, his nerves unraveling with each passing hour. But then, salvation arrived in the form of an urgent summons from the board. His heart raced as he was ushered into a somber meeting room. "We've reviewed the evidence you provided, Ben," the CEO began, his expression grave. "I'm afraid we can't take action against Robert due to his indispensable contributions to our recent breakthrough." Ben's breath caught in his throat, disbelief coursing through his veins. "But—" "It's over, Ben, there's nothing more we can do," the CEO pronounced, finality lacing his words. Defeated, Ben trudged back to his cubicle, grappling with the futility of his efforts. He flinched at the cruel twist of fate that allowed Robert to evade justice, his frustration boiling over. "Good afternoon, Ben," Robert's smug drawl invaded the air, and Ben's fists clenched at his sides. "You've won, Robert," Ben seethed, his voice edged with desperation. "But you won't get away with this forever." Robert's laughter reverberated through the office, a chilling sound that made Ben's blood run cold. "Is that so?" Robert's eyes gleamed with malice. "Maybe it's time I put my latest experiment to good use." Before Ben could comprehend the meaning behind Robert's words, a blinding light enveloped him, accompanied by a cacophony of crackling energy. When the brilliance dissipated, the once-human Ben was gone, replaced by an inanimate object that dangled grotesquely between Robert's legs. "Whwhat have you done to me?" Ben's voice echoed in terror in Robert’s mind. "What a fitting punishment," Robert sneered. "You've acted like a dick, Ben, and now, that's all you'll ever be." Ben's screams of anguish were muffled by the confines of his new existence, his consciousness forever entwined with Robert's depravity. Robert sauntered out of the office, leaving behind the shattered remnants of Ben's life and a chilling reminder of the insidious power he wielded.

Ben refused to accept his fate as Robert's penis, trapped and devoid of agency. "This can't be happening," he muttered, desperation lacing his mind. HIs pleas only amused Robert further as he leaned back on his leather couch, a wicked grin etching into his face. "Oh, Ben, you have no idea how much fun we're going to have together," he taunted, swirling his glass of whiskey with an elegant flick of his wrist. "I promise you, this will be an experience you won't forget, even if you try." The mere thought of being used and erect against Ben’s will made his blood boil: "I won't let you use me like some plaything!" he spat trembling with defiance in Robert’s mind. "I am not your puppet, Robert!" Robert's eyes narrowed, his face now void of mirth. "You will be damned if you think you can defy me," he sneered, a dark edge lacing his tone. "You are mine now, Ben. And whether you like it or not, you will serve your purpose."

Fear and determination mingled within Ben as he refused to succumb to Robert’s dominance. But then, that devious smile crept back onto Robert’s face, and Ben felt his resolve waver. Robert felt victory was close at hand. It was then that Ben heard the unmistakable sounds of a pornographic video playing on the massive television screen before them. Moans, groans, and the rhythmic thumping gradually filled the room. Against Ben’s will, he felt arousal prickling within him. It crawled up his spine, coiling around every nerve ending until he could no longer ignore the pleasure it evoked. Silence fell upon them as he succumbed to the inescapable cravings. He managed to snarl, "What have you done to me?"

Robert chuckled darkly, his eyes glinting with twisted satisfaction. "You are becoming what I've always desired, Ben," he whispered knowingly. "You crave this, the intense pleasure that courses through your veins. You are mine, completely."

The sensations intensified - an overwhelming surge of desire propelled Ben to full erection, his body betraying him once again. His mind, filled with a burning mix of shame and pleasure, was consumed by the intensity of his own lust. And then, as if an invisible hand had gripped him tightly, he climaxed, releasing streams of semen into the confines of his new form.

Robert's triumphant laughter, echoing through the loft, as Ben’s mind swirled with confusion, shame, and an undeniable sense of loss. He was trapped, a prisoner to his own biology.

One day ss Robert and the stunning woman sat across from each other at a candlelit table, Ben brimmed with dark determination. Tonight, he would sabotage Robert's date and make him appear impotent. He contemplated his plan, biding his time as the couple engaged in light conversation and flirtatious banter. As their chemistry grew, so did Ben's anticipation. He was determined not to get hard, to prevent the expected intimacy between the two.

At first, their interactions were innocent - sweet kisses and tender touches. Ben, feeling the rise of Robert's arousal, remained unyielding. But then, everything changed. The beautiful woman's hand glided up Robert's thigh, her fingers brushing against his innermost flesh. As her touch reached its destination, Ben sensed Robert's desire reaching its boiling point. A shiver cascaded through Ben's elongated form, his resistance faltering against the growing storm of arousal.

Inexorably, Robert's body responded to the woman's touch. His member stiffened, eagerly awaiting its invitation into the depths of her warmth. Ben, against his desperate will, found himself succumbing to a primal sensation, an overwhelming lust that clouded his senses. His singular focus became clear - to allow Robert's essence to surge through him and into the woman.

The moment arrived, the woman's yearning gaze locked onto Robert's. Without a hesitation, she guided him into her waiting embrace. As their connection deepened, Ben found himself consumed by a fiery frenzy. The sensations coursing through him were unlike anything he had ever known, a mixture of pleasure and despair that twisted within him.

His thoughts became a maelstrom of conflicting desires - his longing to reclaim his former self and the intense craving to submit to this newfound sensation. The dichotomy of pain and pleasure pushed him to the edge, as he braced himself for the inevitable climax. Time seemed to stand still as the woman and Robert melded into one, their bodies moving in a passionate rhythm. Ben, amidst the chaos of his own existence, felt the crescendo of ecstasy approach. With one final surge, Robert's seed exploded within Ben, racing through every inch of his transformed body. For a fleeting moment, he shared in the pleasure that washed over Robert's face. But as the wave of satisfaction ebbed away, the crushing weight of his fate crashed upon him once again. The realization that he was forever trapped in this form, destined to be nothing more than a vessel for another's pleasure, weighed heavily on his soul.

As the night wore on, Robert and the woman retreated into the depths of their passion. Ben's resolve wavered, his conscious mind drowned in the sea of sensation. In the end, all that remained was the agonizing anticipation of the next encounter, the next release of pleasure.

As the morning light filtered through the curtained windows of Robert's loft, he slowly stirred from his slumber, a feeling of anticipation coursing through his veins. He stretched, the soft sheets of his king-sized bed sliding down his chiseled physique. And then, to his surprise, he felt it—the unmistakable presence of a morning arousal.

His eyes widened with delight as he glanced down at the source of this newfound pleasure. "Oh, Ben," Robert murmured, his voice filled with a mix of admiration and amusement. "Looks like you're quite enthusiastic this morning." Ben, now nothing more than a mere extension of Robert's manhood, responded with an eager twitch. As the morning light danced upon his glistening shaft, he greeted his owner, standing tall and proud as though flaunting his newfound virility. "B-ben. I must say, you're doing a remarkable job," Robert said, his voice tinged with sincere appreciation. "Having such an exceptional member like you makes my mornings all the more delightful." A surge of satisfaction coursed through Ben's elongated form, a warm glow illuminating the depths of his being. Despite the strangeness of his situation, he couldn't help but feel a sense of accomplishment in bringing pleasure to his newfound master. He beckoned Robert closer with an alluring pulse, whispering a silent plea for release, aching to bring Robert to the pinnacle of ecstasy. Robert’s hand wrapped around Ben's taut flesh, stroking him with practiced precision, evoking a symphony of whispered moans and contented sighs. "Ah, Ben, you truly are a masterpiece," Robert murmured, his voice laced with satisfaction. "So responsive, so eager to please. You've truly surpassed all my wildest expectations." Ben quivered beneath Robert's skillful touch, his elongated form throbbing with delight. He embraced his role as Robert's prime pleasure provider, delighting in the sensations that coursed through both their bodies, their souls intimately intertwined. As the tension built, pleasure unfurled like delicate tendrils intertwining between them. Ben trembled on the precipice, a wellspring of desire coursing through his veins. And then, with a final, explosive burst, he unleashed torrents of desire, a testament to his commitment to satisfying his master's needs. Robert cried out in ecstasy, an elated cry that filled their sanctum of pleasure. His grip tightened around Ben, his body wracked with the joys of fulfillment. Ben reveled in his newfound purpose, his body thrumming with a pulsating satisfaction. As the blissful haze began to dissipate, he basked in the afterglow of their shared intimacy, a moment suspended in time.

"Well done, Ben," Robert cooed amidst the fading echoes of their shared passion, his voice filled with affection and appreciation. "You truly are a remarkable masterpiece."

In the wake of their morning awakening, the loft was filled with a tranquil silence. Ben nestled against Robert's form, content in the knowledge that, even as a penis, he had found his place in the world.

As the days went by, Ben had begrudgingly accepted his role as Robert's penis. He performed his duties dutifully, greeting his owner every morning with a stiff salute. However, despite his transformation, Ben couldn't ignore the fact that he used to be a person named Ben—Robert could sense it too. Determined to assert his identity, Ben attempted to engage in conversation with Robert whenever the opportunity arose.

But Robert, refusing to acknowledge Ben's existence as anything other than a penis, ignored him. Ben's growing desire for release and pleasure eventually pushed him to his breaking point. "Please, Robert," Ben pleaded, his voice vibrating within the depths of his transformed flesh. "I need to be touched. I can't bear this any longer."

Robert sighed and looked down at his loyal servant. "Ben," he said sternly, "Penises have no names. If you wish to be pleasured, you must accept that you are now nothing but a penis. No longer a man."

Ben's longing for release outweighed his attachment to his old identity. He swallowed his pride and agreed, "Fine... I won't have a name anymore. Just... just pleasure me, Robert."

Robert's lips curled into a smug grin as he realized he had won. "Good boy," he praised, reaching his hand down to bring life to his obedient appendage. The touch sent shivers along Ben's entire length, teasing him with bouts of both pleasure and frustration. Slowly, skillfully, Robert's hand danced along the shaft, building up the intensity of the experience.

As the mounting pleasure surged through Ben's body, he felt a peculiar sensation growing within him. It wasn't just the impending climax but something different, something alien. And then, in a moment of pure ecstasy, it flooded out—Ben's name, his essence, burst forth with his climax, mixing with his own release. His mind clouded with pleasure, Ben realized that he had truly become just a penis, completely devoid of any memory of his former self. And to his surprise, the thought didn't bother him. In that moment, Robert's penis had forgotten that it had ever been anything else. All that mattered to Ben now was the pleasure he could bring to his owner, his sole reason for existing.

And so, the days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. Ben, now fully embraced as Robert's penis, served his owner faithfully. His name was long forgotten, replaced by the pulsating pleasure he could provide. The loft became a haven for pleasure and indulgence, countless women passing through in search of ecstasy. And with every encounter, Ben's purpose was fulfilled. Pleasure flowed through him, mingling with his owner's satisfaction, and he reveled in his newfound purpose.

At long last, Ben had found his place in the world. Though he had lost his identity as Ben, he found solace and fulfillment as Robert's penis. And as he stood tall and proud, ready to serve yet another willing recipient of pleasure, he realized that sometimes, the most unexpected transformations can lead to a life of unimaginable pleasure and satisfaction.

Every morning, Robert woke up to find himself sporting a raging morning erection. He marveled at the sight, proud of the fact that his penis was now the epitome of virility. One particular morning, after taking a refreshing shower, Robert looked at his reflection in the mirror. His eyes sparkled with mischief as he spoke to his prized possession. "Good morning, my magnificent friend," he purred, his voice filled with a mixture of delight and anticipation. "I hope you're ready for another day of excitement and pleasure."

As if in response to his words, his penis twitched with enthusiasm, growing harder at the prospect of what lay ahead. Robert chuckled with satisfaction, relishing the control he had over his transformed companion. To him, Ben was no longer an individual with thoughts and emotions, but rather a tool designed to bring him immense pleasure.

Throughout the day, Robert's penis remained in a state of constant excitement. It throbbed with anticipation every time a beautiful woman walked by, or when a handsome young man caught his eye. Robert couldn't help but revel in the power he now possessed. He knew that his transformed companion had become a mere extension of his desires, a vessel through which he could experience unparalleled pleasure. As the day drew to a close, Robert returned to his luxurious loft, his thoughts consumed by the absolute control he had over his transformed companion. He stripped away his clothes, his eyes fixated on his magnificent organ. "You've done a wonderful job today," he murmured, his voice laced with praise. His penis pulsed with delight, its veins throbbing with satisfaction. It was eager to please its owner, always craving more of Robert's touch. With every caress, every embrace, it brought Robert immeasurable pleasure. Satisfied with their day's work, Robert allowed himself to succumb to the blissful pleasure that his transformed companion could provide. As his hand wrapped around his throbbing member, he closed his eyes, drowning in the ecstasy that only Ben, now completely devoted to his pleasure, could provide.

The day ended with Robert's satisfied moans filling the air, the pleasure coursing through his veins as his transformed companion fulfilled its purpose.

Robert stood in his luxurious loft, ready to make the next step in his secret experiment. It was the task to transforming his penis back into a human. He had to give it a try. A flicker of light washed over his body and in an instant, his penis transformed back into a human form. But to Robert's surprise, it wasn't Ben that stood before him. Instead, a stunning young man, as if conjured from a wet dream, graced his presence. The stranger possessed chiseled facial features, with high cheekbones that accentuated his flawlessly smooth complexion. Not a single strand of body hair marred his sculpted physique, which boasted athletic muscles without an ounce of fat. Robert couldn't take his eyes off this dreamlike figure, with piercing blue eyes and short, tousled blonde hair that completed his ethereal appearance.

Expecting Ben to recognize him, Robert spoke his name with anticipation. "Ben, how are you?" To his surprise, the young man stared back with confusion, questioning his identity. Robert asked for his name, but the youth replied blankly that he had no name. Perplexed, Robert decided to bestow upon him the name Beau. It seemed fitting for this enigmatic creation. Robert pondered what his new companion might desire after his time spent as a penis. He believed that Ben must have missed certain experiences that were impossible in that state. Eager to see what Beau's desires were, Robert asked him what he would like to do now. Without hesitation, Beau replied, a mischievous glint in his eyes, that he wished to be touched by Robert, to bring him pleasure. A tinge of excitement coursed through Robert as he realized the potential lying before him. With a newfound purpose, Beau stood there, poised to indulge in the pleasures he was created for. The transformation had not brought back his memories, but Beau was eager to explore his new role. And Robert was more than ready to find out just how good Beau could make him feel.

Robert stood in the sleek modern office, a triumphant smile on his face. Beau, his newly transformed companion, stood beside him, looking strikingly handsome in his youthful appearance. He wore a crisp suit that fit him perfectly, accentuating his chiseled physique.

 Robert introduced Beau to the CEO, proudly stating that Beau used to be Ben, but their experiment had been a success. Beau was now the perfect, loyal, and submissive intern. The CEO looked at Beau, a mixture of surprise and curiosity evident in his eyes. "Is this true, Robert? This young man used to be Ben?" Robert nodded, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction. "Yes, CEO, you wouldn't believe it, but the transformation was incredible. Beau here used to be a bit of a handful, but now, he's just the obedient intern I've always wanted." Beau, still coming to terms with his new existence, stood up straighter and tried to hide his lack of knowledge about his previous life as Ben. "Yes, CEO, I'm Beau now. I'm ready to do whatever it takes to succeed, just like Robert." The CEO chuckled, clearly amused and intrigued by the situation. "Well, Robert, I have to say, your methods may be unorthodox, but if it yields such remarkable results, who am I to argue? Welcome aboard, Beau. I trust Robert will introduce you to the ins and outs of the business world." Robert smiled, his hand reaching out to brush against Beau's arm possessively. "Of course, CEO. Beau here is a quick learner. I have no doubt that he'll be an invaluable addition to the team."

As the CEO left the office, closing the door behind him, Robert turned to face Beau, a devious glint in his eyes. "Well, Beau, now that you're my perfect intern, I think it's time for you to show just how devoted you are to pleasing me."

Beau's heart raced in his chest as he looked into Robert's eyes, feeling a mix of excitement and trepidation. He knew what Robert was implying, and a part of him ached with desire to fulfill his new purpose. "Yes, Robert. I want to be just like you. I want to bring you pleasure and be completely devoted to your desires." Robert's smile widened, and he leaned closer to Beau, his voice a low, seductive whisper. "Good. I'm glad you're eager. Now, show me just how willing and skilled you can be."

Beau nodded, his heart pounding in anticipation. He dropped to his knees, his hands reaching for Robert's belt buckle. As Beau began to undo it and to suck Robert’s cock, the office became a sanctuary of desire, where pleasure and submission reigned supreme.